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x husbands new wife is trying to take my grandkids from there mother

Posted by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:09 AM
  • 12 Replies

Good morning just wanted to ask and get some opinions on this situation my daughters x has remarried a woman with a record you can see it on maryland judicary systems website she is very upset that her children have to be anywhere near this woman and she has brainwashed my daughters x into believing my daughter is some kind of horrible mother she is a professional in the medical field and is a outstanding person all around.

They are very jealous of her and what she has been able to accomplish and she is raising the 2 children to be wellrounded and respectful adults.

But they new wife has stopped all communication between her x and her it has to go through a court ordered system called the wizard and he is suppose to be the only one writing emails on it but she is constantly on there writing long nasty emails to upset my daughter we believe she does this to try and get our daughter to lose her temper the goal which has been made known is to take the children so they can stop paying the 1200 a month in child support. They don't want the kids its all a money issue the oldest is going to a counseler once a week and the counsler has told our daughter that she has seen this many times before and its all about the money its so sad the x can't see what he is doing to his kids they really don't even want to go to his house for visitation they have 4 dogs at his home and the kids say its just gross one of the dogs which belong to the new wife has bitten our grandaughter 5 times over the past 2 years any suggestions about what to do about that?

He blames our grandaughter for her getting bitten and scolded her for telling her mother about the dog bite.

THe counsler has told her that was exactly what she should have done now she is scared to go for visitation on wed because he will yell at her for telling her mother about the dog bite that happened at his house.

I could go on for days its been a nightmare the court advocate has recommended she file papers to get total rights to all decision making since he is so unreasonable about everything she ask him to do with the children alot of activites the children have are on his weekends and he refuses to take them when it comes to vacations he is flat out no about bending at all for that he has stopped the children from going on trips to Colorado, Disneyworld and even coming to visit us in Ga they love coming down there and spending 3 weeks in the summer but its always a fight and the court advocate has to get involved and that cost money.

I feel so bad for her and what she is going through just needed to vent thanks for listening and have a great day everyone!!

by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:09 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mytrueloveS
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 9:50 AM
She can try full custody. Tell her to save all the emails as well as records where the dog bit ur granddaughter.
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breebree04
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 9:55 AM

Ugh I feel for your dd having to go through this and deal with them. Sad for the children involved. Hopefully your dd can deal with this in court and get some things changed. Can she use the new wifes record against her? I would tell the judge about the dog bites too.

amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 1:51 PM

That's horrible!  I hope your daughter is keeping a record of all of these emails/communications from both the ex and his new wife.  They can be admissable in court.

victoriahearts
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 3:29 PM
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I'm sorry that your daughter is having to deal with such a horrible situation, best advice that I can think of is for her to print out all the emails that she has received from the new wife out, she shouldn't response to any of her emails unless it comes from her ex and it's related to the children. Second I'm sure your daughter has taken your grandchild to the doctor after each dog bites, I would ask the doctor office to give her copies of her chart from each visit, it's obviously happen more then once or twice , which means your grand child father has done nothing to prevent it from happening again, this is considered abuse and your daughter should report it immediately to child services as well as report the dog to animal control. I would also tell her to fill for full custody of her children, between the dog bites and the therapist testimony at the very least the court will start an investigation and demand supervised visitation in a neutral place. Because her ex and his new wife is such scumbags I would also recommend she get an attorney if she can afford one so that she has someone that will stay on top of all these little details. Best of luck.

kb636
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:21 PM

Man, I am sorry for your grandkids your daughter and you.  This situation is crazy, and unfortunately versions of it play out all the time.  I used to work with battered women and the things those men (using the term very loosely) would do.

Victoriahearts has given you very good advice.  The record of the new wife may not help, depending on what the charges were.  You may want to check into that and see what the charges were and if they originally strted out as something else and a plea was worked out.

Physicians records and documentation of each dog bite, in addition to any other injuries that happen while the kids are in his custody, are great to have and keep.  Obviously not little everyday type of kids injuries, but falls, cuts, and anything that leaves a mark should be documented.  Those that do not require an office visit can be documented with pictures.

Contact the local version of chldrens services and let them know about the dog bites as well as the conditions cause by so many animals.  The sort of "gross" I am imagining may be grounds for loss of visitation if only temporary.

Regarding the new wife taunting and trying to get your daughter to do something that will be held against her through the courts contact system, in addition to printing out the emails she should contact the site administrator and let them know that it is being used by an unauthorized individual.  I addition, depending on local laws, she may be able to file harassment charges,

Basically document EVERYTHING.  If he has the kids, and ends up working late or something that forces the girls to spend more time with this new woman, document it.  If they fail to provide edications as advised, document it.  If they refuse to get them to events that they enjoy (and which are probably very good for mental health given the way some of the "adults" are acting) document it.

If your daughter can not afford an attorney at this time, she may want to look into the possaility of getting a guadian ad litem  for the kids.  If childrens services gets involved, which I hope they do, they will most likely get one for them.

I hope at least some of this is helpful.  My thoughts are with the children as well as you and your daughter.

Good luck.




Serenitymom
by Bronze Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:34 PM
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I am very suprised that the couselor has not reported the X with child protective services. If this child is explaining dog bites, and a horrid living condition to the counselor, the counselor should have contacted child protective services with just these matters. I would talk to your daughter about the counselor your granddaughter has, he/she may not be a very good one if he/she is not reporting these dangers. Also, if the child is explaining her fears of going to see him to this counselor, something should have been done already.

I also agree to documenting everything like with the previous posters has said. This is going to take some serious law enforcing. And the harassing emails.... save them. They can be used against her to file a protection from abuse or stalking order. Have her ready up a lawyer..... She'll need one.

I hope you guys the best.

easinpc
by Gold Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 9:30 AM

Hugs!!

HyperMom38
by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 9:37 AM

This!!!  -but I would also get a restraining order or something added to the custody agreement preventing this new wife from having contact with your grand children based on her criminal history.

Quoting victoriahearts:

I'm sorry that your daughter is having to deal with situation a horrible situation, best advice that I can think of is for her to print out all the emails that she has received from the new wife out, she shouldn't response to any of her emails unless it comes from her ex and it's related to the children. Second I'm sure your daughter has taken your grandchild to the doctor after each dog bites, I would ask the doctor office to give her copies of her chart from each visit, it's obviously happen more then once or twice , which means your grand child father has done nothing to prevent it from happening again, this is considered abuse and your daughter should report it immediately to child services as well as report the dog to animal control. I would also tell her to fill for full custody of her children, between the dog bites and the therapist testimony at the very least the court will start an investigation and demand supervised visitation in a neutral place. Because her ex and his new wife is such scumbags I would also recommend she get an attorney if she can afford one so that she has someone that will stay on top of all these little details. Best of luck.


sid1083
by Silver Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 3:06 PM

Why is the judge or a court referee not monitoring MFW? This kind of situation is EXACTLY why the site was created.

hurricane37
by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 9:44 PM

Well, if I were her, I would not talk to the new wife. She should ignore what she says and not reply to that to show restraint which will be a good thing if she gets into a custody battle. She should not say anything vulgar or anything on there that they can use against her and she should definitely not list any problems on there.

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