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should she just file for custody!!! wwud??

Posted by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 12:50 PM
  • 19 Replies

so ive posted here b4 this is for my daughter .....her lawyer drew up an agreement for her ..and them to sign and he wnts to change alot like he wants 50 /50 and in there is says visittion hours for him no he wants both of them to have visitation bc its attacking him how does the mom have visitation when baby lives with herhe also had a drug and acohol background he goes to aa meetings so in there she put no drugs or acohl around baby he wants it to be directed to both of them bc its attacking him again  also hewants a 2 weekvactation w a 10 week oldthats ebf bc she gets a vataction bc there againg its attacking him after a 1yr she said she would reconsider no not good enough .....if she does file should she file for sole custody how likely is that possible ??i dont know anyone whos been through custody so im lost at helping her so i need advice please !!!!

by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 12:50 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Robsessed98
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 3:28 PM

If he won't agree to sign it, then it's time to take him to court or a mediator and get it done. When he finds out how much it may cost him, he just might sign the agreement.

MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 3:35 PM
1 mom liked this

If he is fighting then she should file for primary custody or sole custody with visitation for him. Is he trying to pay less in child support? Those are two seperate court issues.

3grls1wildboy
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 3:40 PM

hes not paying cs yet but if he gets joint does that mean he pays less??bc this guy is allll about money and his aa councelor is a lawyer so he gets all the free help there is while my daughter is struggling to pay for her lawyer is it hard for a mother to get sole custody or primary custody whats the difference?? 


Quoting MeeshMom:

If he is fighting then she should file for primary custody or sole custody with visitation for him. Is he trying to pay less in child support? Those are two seperate court issues.


 

MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 3:42 PM

If a custody order is set first saying they get equal parenting time, he will pay less in child support or maybe nothing. It really depends on who makes more than who and what state and so on. She needs to make sure the kids are mostly with her and he has visitation.

Quoting 3grls1wildboy:

hes not paying cs yet but if he gets joint does that mean he pays less??bc this guy is allll about money and his aa councelor is a lawyer so he gets all the free help there is while my daughter is struggling to pay for her lawyer is it hard for a mother to get sole custody or primary custody whats the difference?? 


Quoting MeeshMom:

If he is fighting then she should file for primary custody or sole custody with visitation for him. Is he trying to pay less in child support? Those are two seperate court issues.




 

steviechick
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:03 PM

hugs< this is for your daughter.  Hope she works everything out with the stbx loser.

PinkButterfly66
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:11 PM

She should not sign that.  She should take him to court for sole custody and only supervised visits for no more than a few hours at a time.  No overnight visits.  

3grls1wildboy
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 5:26 PM

 is it fairly easyfor a mother to get sole custody? the paper that lawyer wrote up he was only going to get baby 2 days a week thats totally not 50 /50 she doeant want him to have 50 /50 but he says its only fair ...


Quoting PinkButterfly66:

She should not sign that.  She should take him to court for sole custody and only supervised visits for no more than a few hours at a time.  No overnight visits.  


 

PinkButterfly66
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 5:33 PM

Yes the mother can get sole custody.  It's not about what is fair, it is about what is in the best interest of the child.  The child is an infant.  Does she trust her ex to be able to feed the child round the clock and keep the child's diapers changed?  If this lawyer is not representing HER and HER wishes, then she needs a new lawyer.

Quoting 3grls1wildboy:

 is it fairly easyfor a mother to get sole custody? the paper that lawyer wrote up he was only going to get baby 2 days a week thats totally not 50 /50 she doeant want him to have 50 /50 but he says its only fair ...


Quoting PinkButterfly66:

She should not sign that.  She should take him to court for sole custody and only supervised visits for no more than a few hours at a time.  No overnight visits.  




3grls1wildboy
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 5:46 PM

 

the lawyer ison her side and put in agreement for her to have sole custody he looked it over and he said no way he wanted 50 /50 and wanted other things changed  ..i think hes tring to get out of paying cs bc hes tring tto get her to drop it ( hes all about money ) she only had the lawyer foro the time to write up an agreement .h.is aacoulselor is a lawyer so he get all the free help he wants and my daughter dont want him putting things in there that will hurt her and baby in the end we are not law savvy like i didnt know 50 /50 means less or no cs

Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Yes the mother can get sole custody.  It's not about what is fair, it is about what is in the best interest of the child.  The child is an infant.  Does she trust her ex to be able to feed the child round the clock and keep the child's diapers changed?  If this lawyer is not representing HER and HER wishes, then she needs a new lawyer.

Quoting 3grls1wildboy:

 is it fairly easyfor a mother to get sole custody? the paper that lawyer wrote up he was only going to get baby 2 days a week thats totally not 50 /50 she doeant want him to have 50 /50 but he says its only fair ...

 

Quoting PinkButterfly66:

She should not sign that.  She should take him to court for sole custody and only supervised visits for no more than a few hours at a time.  No overnight visits.  

 

 



 

sandie66
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 6:21 PM

 I don't know what state you are in. This is pretty much what would happen in Florida.

It's almost impossible to get full custody unless the other parent is found incompetent. 50/50 in Florida means, the child goes back and forth to each parent's house for a week (sometimes 2) at a time and NO ONE pays or receives child support.

Shared parenting means the child lives with one parent and the other parent has visitation and all major events MUST be agreed to between both parents (medical, education, religion etc).

If they can't come to terms between the 2 of them, then they will go up before a judge. So your lawyer would send this agreement to your ex and the court. He will have 30 days to answer. After he answers you will get a court date. Your lawyer will tell the judge what you want and your ex will tell the judge what he wants and the JUDGE will decide.

And unless the father gets an attorney, it won't cost him a penny because you will pay for your lawyer and court costs. When I went to court, my attorney asked for my ex to reimburse my attorney fees and we were told since he had no lawyer it would not be right to make him pay for mine and my ex can afford a dozen lawyers, but after 3 divorces I guess he's a pro.

 

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