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Daughters dad had another kid &

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Now him & his gf are living together.

Me & his gf dont get along for things for many different reason.

He wasnt paying cs, so I filed &now hes already in back pay & owes 562 a month . I had to do it because it wasnt fair that he was making more babies & not even supporting his first one.That money isnt for me its for our kid to surve each day.

So now im ready to go to the next step & thats custody......

We dont get  along & neither me & his gf. He brings her for drop off & she makes her lit comments & I dont like it because its not her child. I dont tell her anything anymore. I just brush it off. So I would like to know is it ok if I ask for no gf/bf pick up or drop off & for her not to get involved in our business with our child??

& i honestly dont trust this gir with my child, I dont feel like she treats my daughter as her own. I would rather my daughters dad be with someone who cares for his child & now it will really show if she cares for her since she just had her  1sr child.I think things will be different because when ur with someone who  has a kid & u dont, your all about their kid & once u have a kid. totally diff stor

advice please

by on Feb. 3, 2013 at 12:51 PM
Replies (31-36):
LifeCafe42
by Nora on Feb. 5, 2013 at 11:06 PM
Is your child safe in the home? Is she being abused? Does she have food and a place to sleep? Your exs gf isn't required to love your child like her own a bonus if she does. Remember whatever you put in the order will reflect you too so if you get a bf they can't be around her either. If there is a new baby around you probably will have this person in your life for a long time. Be the bigger person and try to get along
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faerie75
by Ruby Member on Feb. 6, 2013 at 1:16 PM

 yes definitely. i even told my ex "try not viewing me as an ex but rather a business partner w a common interest" he thought i was ridiculous but eventually he changed his ways.

Quoting ssilva03:

I need to not fight back with him,its just more stress i give myself.i need boundaries with him.


Quoting faerie75:

 ya i was there too and i used to dish it right back. i decided NOT to engage him. it eventually worked. lol


 

 
        
         

proudmommy5994
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 1:20 PM

Our custody agreement says no paramores (which is live in or over night visits with boyfriend/girlfriends or lovers).

sid1083
by Silver Member on Feb. 6, 2013 at 4:26 PM

Don't waste your effort writing a custody agreement solely around one person. Who knows, this relationship may not work out and now you have a semi-moot CO on your hands. And then the next one is worse.

michiganmom5150
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 5:03 PM
We have the no gf/bf spending the night while kids are present in our divorce papers. I think it says unless they are living there. Neither of us are the type to do that unless we are married anyway. You can request that all things involving your kid are handled between you and him. This way she can't say he can 't talk to you or whatever. Good luck.
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MamaHens3
by Martica on Feb. 6, 2013 at 7:03 PM

Unless she's hurting your DD, or she's in harms way you can't control his life. You can at least ask if he pick her up, sans the gf and that way you two can keep the peace. She shouldn't be butting in, that includes saying comments to you and he should be telling her to knock it off it not being helpful. She's not suppose to love your child like her own, I agree with that yet it's good to know your ex is with someone who does though. 

My XDH he met someone, or got more serous with someone when I moved out of the house oct 2010. By that Christmas, he had her moved in and i was in fire! I was ticked, he would bring her over along side and i told him you can come alone. An not need a helper, if you don't I'll tell her what I think about it all. An he stopped, he knew I would and my fourths dad when around was never involved in our business. I got the kids on my own, he knew he was around them and he treated them well. My XDH's now wife, they got married been for over a year now. She treats our children well, she loves them and that's a plus. If he had to be with someone, I would rather her like them and love them some how as her own level. He's having one with her, due soon enough and I know she will want time with her first child. An I know I will get more time with our kids, the three with my XDH and can't wait. LOL. 

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