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I HATE getting jealous over my ex :(

Posted by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:18 PM
  • 16 Replies

It's so frustrating when I have all these good memories of being with my ex come up and then I talk to him on skype and hear a random girl in the background and get all pissed off. Sorry for my really long sentence. I hate all these mixed feelings. I have absolutely no right to be jealous as I have be sort of seeing another guy here (I moved about an hour away). My ex and I parted on good terms and both decided that we would leave the option of getting back together open but that if we met someone in the meantime, we shouldn't let our history get in the way of new opportunities.

And yet here I am, all jelly and pissed off and just want to yell at him and ask why it can't be like we both wanted so bad for it to be :(

and yes, I know it's a total over reaction and that I need to just move on. That's way easier said than done.

by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
AngeLnChainZ
by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:19 PM
1 mom liked this

all "jelly" ?

Yea.. you lost all bit of mature advice I was going to offer ..

        

BensMom12412
by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:35 PM
I understand how you feel. How long were yall together?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:39 PM
1 mom liked this

*HUGS*

Lil_MissFaye
by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:40 PM

 I was being facetious when I made they "jelly" comment hun.


Quoting AngeLnChainZ:

all "jelly" ?

Yea.. you lost all bit of mature advice I was going to offer ..



Lil_MissFaye
by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 11:55 PM

Off and on, almost 10 years :( We have a son that will be 8 in March. He was my first real bf, a lot of firsts for me. We were so young and we tried SO hard to make it work. I was devestated when I got the divorce papers, even though I knew it was likely going to happen. It is just so hard bc even though I have moved over an hour away and I don't even have hardly any of my stuff (staying with family), I keep finding little reminders of him. Notes he wrote me that were so full of love and promises to make things work, no matter how hard it got. But we both just keep screwing shit up bc of our own personal issues. The reason I moved is to take care of myself, get healthy and find my inner happiness. He says he completely understands and agrees that this is where I need to be, but ti's really hard. It's hard on me not to see my son every day and he understnads that. It's really frustrating bc there are a lot of things the he doesn't do that I feel he should be doing but, I just have tell myself that eventually my son will live with me most of the year and I can rebuild the structure that I know he needs.

It's just so incredibly difficult for me to let go of those old feelings when so many things remind me of him :(


Quoting BensMom12412:

I understand how you feel. How long were yall together?



victoriahearts
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 10:17 AM
2 moms liked this

You left because you need to work on yourself and find your inner happiness then you need to start working on that and stop thinking about the past and start moving towards , yes it's not easy but you need to put an effort. First , find a professional to help you start moving forward, talking to someone and finding out why you are unhappy is the first step toward putting your life together, second , "clean house" you either need to throw out all memories of your past relationship with him or store them away somewhere you can't have access too. You can't move forward if you are living in the past, third, no more skyping with him or talking about all times you need to start acting like a single woman that is working on  herself,  the only reason to communicate with him is regarding your child and his well being, and you should make time to talk and see your son. I know this may sound like hard advice but you need some right now, you need to motivate yourself and put your life back together. Yes he was your first love but things happen and there is no way that relationship will ever been fixable if you can't fix what is making you unhappy right. Work on yourself and then work on your relationship with you son, once those things are going well for a long period of time then you can revisit your past with your ex, you may totally have a different option of him and your relationship. Good luck 


Quoting Lil_MissFaye:

Off and on, almost 10 years :( We have a son that will be 8 in March. He was my first real bf, a lot of firsts for me. We were so young and we tried SO hard to make it work. I was devestated when I got the divorce papers, even though I knew it was likely going to happen. It is just so hard bc even though I have moved over an hour away and I don't even have hardly any of my stuff (staying with family), I keep finding little reminders of him. Notes he wrote me that were so full of love and promises to make things work, no matter how hard it got. But we both just keep screwing shit up bc of our own personal issues. The reason I moved is to take care of myself, get healthy and find my inner happiness. He says he completely understands and agrees that this is where I need to be, but ti's really hard. It's hard on me not to see my son every day and he understnads that. It's really frustrating bc there are a lot of things the he doesn't do that I feel he should be doing but, I just have tell myself that eventually my son will live with me most of the year and I can rebuild the structure that I know he needs.

It's just so incredibly difficult for me to let go of those old feelings when so many things remind me of him :(


Quoting BensMom12412:

I understand how you feel. How long were yall together?





steviechick
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 10:42 AM

I hope you are able to fix the personal problems in your life soon.  I know you miss your DS, but in order to gain full happiness right now you need to get rid of what caused all the pain in your life.  I agree with Victoria.  Throw away the past as it's not going to give you anything but pain.  Gain perspective on what your life should be like.  Once you do that you can move on and get your son back.  Getting over a loved on is a painful road.  But, I see that you already decided to break away from your stbx and are now just starting to realize that your life with him is over and done.  Once you rebuild your life and make it strong enough for your son to be in it, you first have to accept what it is you truly need in your life.  Good luck!

BensMom12412
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 11:13 AM
This.


Quoting victoriahearts:

You left because you need to work on yourself and find your inner happiness then you need to start working on that and stop thinking about the past and start moving towards , yes it's not easy but you need to put an effort. First , find a professional to help you start moving forward, talking to someone and finding out why you are unhappy is the first step toward putting your life together, second , "clean house" you either need to throw out all memories of your past relationship with him or store them away somewhere you can't have access too. You can't move forward if you are living in the past, third, no more skyping with him or talking about all times you need to start acting like a single woman that is working on  herself,  the only reason to communicate with him is regarding your child and his well being, and you should make time to talk and see your son. I know this may sound like hard advice but you need some right now, you need to motivate yourself and put your life back together. Yes he was your first love but things happen and there is no way that relationship will ever been fixable if you can't fix what is making you unhappy right. Work on yourself and then work on your relationship with you son, once those things are going well for a long period of time then you can revisit your past with your ex, you may totally have a different option of him and your relationship. Good luck 



Quoting Lil_MissFaye:

Off and on, almost 10 years :( We have a son that will be 8 in March. He was my first real bf, a lot of firsts for me. We were so young and we tried SO hard to make it work. I was devestated when I got the divorce papers, even though I knew it was likely going to happen. It is just so hard bc even though I have moved over an hour away and I don't even have hardly any of my stuff (staying with family), I keep finding little reminders of him. Notes he wrote me that were so full of love and promises to make things work, no matter how hard it got. But we both just keep screwing shit up bc of our own personal issues. The reason I moved is to take care of myself, get healthy and find my inner happiness. He says he completely understands and agrees that this is where I need to be, but ti's really hard. It's hard on me not to see my son every day and he understnads that. It's really frustrating bc there are a lot of things the he doesn't do that I feel he should be doing but, I just have tell myself that eventually my son will live with me most of the year and I can rebuild the structure that I know he needs.

It's just so incredibly difficult for me to let go of those old feelings when so many things remind me of him :(



Quoting BensMom12412:

I understand how you feel. How long were yall together?








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MsLogansMommy
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 12:13 PM
1 mom liked this

there is nothing wrong or immature about saying all jelly wtf? I don't see how that would make a difference on advice someone has to give smh

OP I think you should just focus on you right now and stay busy if its meant to be it will happen.

easinpc
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 2:17 PM
1 mom liked this

Hugs!

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