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wtf is his damn problem (kind of long)

Posted by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:53 AM
  • 15 Replies

 First I want to start off by saying Happy Valentine's Day to everyone!

 

Now on to my vent/rant/whatever you want to call it...

Me and my DD's father are not together. We never will be. It'll never work. However, that doesn't mean I don't want him to be a part of her life but I'm having a huge issue with him right now about bedtime and bottles. My DD is 19 months old and is still taking a bottle. She gets up in the middle of the night also, crying for me and wanting a bottle and since we share a room and I work f/t I give in and just give her the bottle to get her to go back to sleep. Most of the time she ends up staying in my bed. We went to the DRs the other day and she said no more bottles. Well that night my DD woke up around 3 am crying for her baba. I picked her up, soothed her as best as I could, asked if she was hungry just to make sure that wasn't the issue and then put her back in her crib w/o the bottle and let her cry herself back to sleep. I proceeded to go through the day yesterday (I was off) telling her that her baba's are broken and that she needs to use a sippy cup. She cried and whined a bit but she got over it. I told her dad about this and he flipped out on me telling me that "he's not fucking doing that and that I'm terrible and he doesn't give a shit about what the DR says".. well low and behold SHE DIDN'T GET UP LAST NIGHT! So now my problem is how do I get him to cooperate with me on this? She's supposed to go to his house this weekend and I'm afraid he is going to sabotage this bc that's just how he is so I told him he's not getting her for overnights until he calms down and can talk to me and be cooperative about bettering our child. I did this out of anger but I'm almost ready to seriously follow through bc I am sick of him doing this stuff to me all the time just to get back at me. Does anyone have any advice for me at all on how to handle a 26 y/o child? PLEASE and thank you!!

 p.s. he's trying to get back at me for not wanting to be "friends with benefits" just in case you were wondering why he was trying to hurt me.

banging head into wall

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:53 AM
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Replies (1-10):
s.osborne
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:59 AM
1 mom liked this

 I agree with the no overnights until he wants to do as the DOCTOR says. My niece is 2 and they still give her a pacifier and her teeth are already really bad because of it. STAND FIRM MAMA!

Imaeve2000
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 11:00 AM

Maybe she will sleep through the night with him too. Can you tell him to call and speak to the doctor? Or read about it? Or explain why you are doing this?

steviechick
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 11:25 AM

Men can be asshats.

I would try to calmly reitterate to your ex that his child's needs have to come first.  Tell him to TRY and not give in to bottles at night time.  In fact, ask him to thow them all away and only supply what you give your DD.  Tell him you are at least willing to do this in order for him to help your daughter wean off of her bottle. If he wants to do things his way he will end having to deal with a crying child in the middle of the night.  It's his call.  Yes, it might put you backwards in weaning your DD, but maybe experiencing for himself just how hard it is on you, he might just come to the conclusion that you were (and your doctor) were right all along.  My DD was older than 2 years old before I threw away all of her binkies.  She sometimes couldn't live without them.  I had to wean her off of them because her ped told me that if I didn't her teeth would have an overbite. 

meagn3388
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 1:12 PM

 thanks ladies. i've thrown away the bottles at my house. i'm sure he hasn't thrown his away and won't. he really has issues about being wrong. he just loves to spite me anyway he can especially if he doesn't get his way.

brieri
by Platinum Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 1:50 PM

having chocolate .   I agree the child should be using a sippy cup.  Maybe you can tell your ex that it's ok to give her a sippy cup, but to give her water only at night time.  It's better for her.  Good luck.

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 4:37 PM
1 mom liked this
If there's a CO you can't withhold visits. If not its up to you but if this has been your arrangement expect him to not react well.
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easinpc
by Gold Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 4:42 PM

Hugs!

themomthenurse
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 5:37 PM

Show him pictures of baby teeth with bottle rot and tell him to stop being a lazy parent.

pianokisses
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 5:53 PM

hMMM. Took my daughter off the bottle at 10 months...she still ended up with rotten teeth and she's one I'm so upset. Her first dentist appt is tomorrow morning though. 


Quoting themomthenurse:

Show him pictures of baby teeth with bottle rot and tell him to stop being a lazy parent.



abusednotbroken
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:51 PM

The nerve of hiim wanting "friends with benefits." You're not a freaking prostitute...If you have it at your disposal, I wouldn't even let her go over there. What a punk.

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