DS is 15. He has lived with me since I left his dad 13 years ago. And, he does not want to live there. I take him to all appointments and school commitments. His dad may drop off/pick up occassionally if he doesn't have anything else to do.DS hasn't seen his dad in almost 3wks because his dad completely overreacted when DS "went behind his back" and told me he hadn't taken him to practice yet because that was "disrespectful". He was yelling, DS was in tears and he kept yelling because what DS was saying, although truthful and in a respectful manner, wasn't what his dad wanted to hear (especially when he told him he wasn't going there on what would've been the next visitation day because he was upset and wanted to cool off). Then when they finally talked Wed and made plans for DS to go there Thurs, his dad sent a text a few min later telling him to stay here instead because they had a ballgame and a similar excuse was given today for DS not going with them to a hs basketball game because DS "didn't seem like he really wanted to go". He's a teen, he doesn't seem excited or like he really wants to do anything. lol
His father is remarried and has 3 stepkids who are active in many sports. His father coaches most, if not all, of his stepdaughters' sports and takes off work to take them to various appointments but unable to take off if DS has an appointment and unwilling to pick DS up after group therapy so he can see him on "his day". If he can't arrange his schedule so he can see his bio child every other weekend and on two pre-set days per week, and he can't take DS to any appointments, how in the hell does he think he can care for him full time??? He does pay child support and I'm thankful for that but he's completely obvlivious to his son's special emotional needs.
Who even threatens to sue for custody of a 15yo when they constantly ask their ex to pick up their slack anyway? He threatened to sue for 50/50 a few years ago and said I couldn't prove him unfit like that automatically granted him joint custody. I don't think he has the slightest clue what's involved with petitioning the court for sole custody. Honestly, I don't know everything involved because I've never gone to court for custody but I don't think I have much to worry about. DS's doctors, therapist, teachers, and coach know me. They have probably never talked to his dad. I've started keeping a journal of all the times he calls/texts saying he can't get DS when he's supposed to (just wish I would've done it continuously) but January alone shows a pattern because he was doing those things before threatening to sue once he realized cs will be increased. If he hasn't been involved for the past 5 years and was barely involved before then, I don't see him convincing a judge, or anyone, he'll be involved enough to be primary caregiver now.