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Alone

Posted by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 2:10 AM
  • 13 Replies
2 moms liked this

I am so tired of being alone. I'm 8 months pregnant with my twins, a boy and a girl. I'm so excited to meet them and I already love them more than life itself. I know they are priceless and special and my number one priority, but I'm scared and lonely. I have some good girl friends, who do their best, but we're all young and they haven't had kids or gone through half the things I have, so it's hard for them to relate. Sometimes I feel so incredibly alone I just cry and cry and cry. I know that once I hold my babies for the first time I will not care that there isn't a man by my side, but it hurts so bad right now knowing I don't have a man by my side. I'm dating, and I know it shouldn't even be a concern of mine, but I miss the companionship. I do want to be held at night. I do want a man to rub my belly and care about the 3 of us. I would be lying if I didn't say I pray that I'll find a great guy to sweep me off my feet and be a father to my babies. I don't know what to do. I've met some great guys, but no one's quite interested in really stepping up. I mean, I can't blame them, I'm 21 and pregnant with twins! What guy would sign up for that mess?! I'm just really really lonely. 

by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 2:10 AM
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Replies (1-10):
brieri
by Platinum Member on Feb. 20, 2013 at 2:21 AM

 Hi and welcome to the group.

What happened to the man you were with who got you preggo?

plainjane55
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 2:22 AM

 Love takes time. I didn't meet the right man til 8 years after my son was born. 8 years is a long time. I was on and off with BD but his sole intentions were just sex and someone to play videogames with. I was young too and didn't know better was only 19 when I had my first. You learn life lessons more as you get older. Good luck to you. God bless.

margie92
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 2:35 AM

To be honest, I'm not quite sure who the father is. I think it is my ex boyfriend. He knows and doesn't want to be involved until I am in labor. 

margie92
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 2:36 AM
1 mom liked this

Thank you for your post. I know that someday, I will meet him. Even if it is 8 or 10 years from now. I just can't imagine being alone that long. I know that it will be worth it once I do find him. It just sucks in the meantime. 

easinpc
by Gold Member on Feb. 20, 2013 at 10:01 AM

Hugs!!

steviechick
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 10:29 AM

Hi, Margie and welcome to the group.  It is awful to feel alone in the world.  I know the feeling of loneliness.  I've been divorced from my ex for just over a year.  I have an 18 yr old daughter that I barely see.  I have few friends and no boyfriend.  I try to stay busy at work and on my own.  It's not easy seeing couples and families being happy and together while you are alone.  You need to adjust to the fact that yes, you are alone.  BUT, you will have two children to take care of in a few months.  They will keep you plenty busy.  Even though you have no bf or the BD isn't involved in your life perhaps he will once the babies come.  If not, then your kids will have a great mom to care for them.  I'm 48 soon to be 49.  I have had to start my life all over again.  It's not been easy for me.  I've been a mom before.  It's a great job.  Just look forward to having those babies by your side and loving them.

Cenedra64
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 10:36 AM
We all get lonely. ::hugs:: try reaching out to some new parenting classes. That might help makew friends
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on Feb. 20, 2013 at 11:05 AM

Welcome mama you don't need a man to make you happy start looking into mama groups now in your area.  Focus on your babies congrats!

mandyjschmidt
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 11:34 AM
I know how u feel. I'm all alone too. I'm pregnant & going thru a bad divorce & living in a town where I don't know anybody. It's really hard. I hate being alone too, but I decided I'd rather be alone than with a man who doesn't respect me, doesnt want to grow up & be responsible. This is really the 1st time in my adult life (I'm 34) that I've really been alone. I feel like no man is going to want me bc I already have 2 kids (11 & 7) and am pregnant with my 3rd. I hv learned a lot about myself, my strengths, & I'm learning how to be happy once again. I hvnt been happy in a very long time (and I had someone by my side). Good luck sweety, u will make it! You're still so young and hv a long life ahead of u. U will find a special guy to be with when the time is right. Right now just focus on yourself & your babies. Once they arrive, your whole focus will change!!!
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twinmom719
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:02 PM

Hello, I am a single mother of twins also.  I was married to their father but we seperated when the twins were about 4 months old, so quite soon after their birth.  They are almost four years old now.

Hopefully it will help you to hear that taking care of twins by yourself is doable and was a fun, happy experience for me, despite some challenges.  If I were you, I would focus on creating a nice life for the twins, getting settled into a routine before looking for a guy.  I have been with a new guy for over a year now, and he is amazing and all is going well.  But, I didnt even think about dating until I had a good job, stable childcare situation, and a decent place to live.   I definitely think it helped knowing I could do it on my own, without needing anyone to take care of us.  So now, my boyfriend is just icing on the cake.  We are starting to get serious, but taking it very, very slowly, letting him get used to the idea of being a "stepdaddy" to the twins.

I think you can do it, too, and you will find someone.  There were people that told me that guys would never want me because of being saddled with two young kids, but thats completely wrong.  There are great guys out there that will see you for who you are and not dismiss you because of the kid thing.

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