In 2012 I had an unexpected pregnancy with my at the time boyfriend. We lived in a vary small effency apartment. His father had just moved out then his big brother moved in. He promised when he moved in he would be out before the baby and that he would rarly ever be there. It took him 6 months to find a job, and he was always there and rarly left. When we left he would follow us. Both my babydaddy and i are musicians, and so isnt his brother. So they set up a recording studio in our already tight space and they recorded during my whole pregnancy. Also they were always gone fishing. My babydaddy also has a big problem with drinking and ciggeretts. He drank almost every day of my pregnancy and after. He was extreamly abusive in the beggining of my pregnancy but i didnt have the heart to leave becuase i always had faith that he would be so much more. After i had the baby i didnt get much help, i was up all night and all day then at four weeks post partum i went back to work after his brother harrassing me for needing help during my pregnancy with my phone bill. then i also picked up two more jobs and was going to school. i litterally got four hours of sleep if that every night. The boys would keep the baby and i up all hours of the night. My babydaddy would always come home talking about some pretty girl or telling me how bad my stomach looked and how i wasnt pretty any more. I finally started talking to other men. It got to the point were i just let my self go and ended up sleeping with an old friend which i felt so guitly about. I ended up getting sick of everything and knew something was seriously wrong if i would do somthing like that cause thats nothing like me. So i called my mom and packed my things and moved in with her on feb 3rd. later that night i told him what i had done. everythings a mess. He calles me harrassing me everynight and telling me to kill myself or that i'm ugly and so many other horrible things, but the truth is i miss him, i miss laying with him, i miss the vary little good times that we had and i dont want him to have that with anyone elce. I promised him i would never ask for child support as long as he helped out, and hes not, hes not giving me a cent for vanessa. I dont know how to move on. What do I do!!!!