Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

Dating/new relationships and single mommyhood

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:20 AM
  • 16 Replies

I'm finding it very hard to date/have a new relationship and balance time as a single working mom.  After the Ex left, I didn't date for a year or so.  Over the summer the kids spend with their dad, I met someone who I get along really well with.  We began seeing each other and then the kids came back.  It's been tough trying to fit this new love interest in my life.  I don't have a sitter lined up so I rely on my parents and when they visit their dad (which is not consistent).  I am taking it slow and do not wish to do things with the new man and my kids.  If any of you ladies are in this situation, do you find it hard to date or find time for a new relationship when you have children?  Any advice on how to balance all of this?

Eva

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:20 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
mytrueloveS
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:22 AM
1 mom liked this
Relationships are difficult when there are children involved.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
ChgIsGood2012
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:40 PM

I agree. I tried doing it a couple of times, and just kind of backed away from it. Someone gets the short end of the stick - whether it's the new man or your kids. And for me, I don't want my son to feel short changed, so I'd rather not date, friends are plenty for me.

But I know you are looking for HOW to balance it, so I hope that someone responds that can give you some guidance and has been successful in this part of their life.

(maybe I can learn something too, LOL)

Quoting mytrueloveS:

Relationships are difficult when there are children involved.


 

brieri
by Platinum Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:51 PM

 No need to rush.  Taking care of your children should be your primary responsiblity.  When you find the time with the new beau then let that be the time to say a-ok.

steviechick
by Gold Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 2:03 PM
1 mom liked this

How did you meet this guy?  I'm having problems actually meeting a guy.  LOL!

What about asking the kids' friends if they can spend some time with them while you go out on a date?  Sleepovers at their place and then you invite the kids over to your place the following weekend? 

kmarsh3
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:01 PM

That is too funny...I am wondering also how to meet people. I just didn't want to post it. I have been by myself for three years, and my ex is already getting remarried...Crazy since he is the one who cheated throuh the whole marriage, and here I am trying to remember what a date feels like.


Quoting steviechick:

How did you meet this guy?  I'm having problems actually meeting a guy.  LOL!

What about asking the kids' friends if they can spend some time with them while you go out on a date?  Sleepovers at their place and then you invite the kids over to your place the following weekend? 



ans11950
by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 1:10 AM
1 mom liked this
I met a great guy at my former job. It took four months of us talking for me to finally agree to date because I wasn't sure I was ready to date. I changed my mind when I saw how great he is with my son. Even his whole family treats my son as if he is part of their family. Sometimes it gets hard seeing eachother due to schedules, but we make it work. We mostly have to hang out at eachother's houses because my son is still little, but he would rather do that anyways rather than go out. Any guy who you date should care about you AND your children and make it work around you guys.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
NaviHope
by Member on Mar. 11, 2013 at 9:57 AM

 Meeting guys is hard.  I think the best way is to tell your friends and family that you are looking/open to meeting a guy and have them suggest/introduce you to the singles they know.  My girlfriends all have a cousin, or a co-worker knows a great guy...a single dad who coaches for a friend etc.  I actually was introduced to my current guy by my girlfriend.  She was dating a guy who had a single friend so they said let's introduce our single friends to each other.  It happened to work out.  They have since broken up and so now it's awkward but what can you do?  I tried online dating for a spell and found it difficult. 

I always seem to get the kids parents that will allow their kids to come over but don't invite my kids back or I am not comfortable with letting my kids spend the night.  I need a great reliable sitter which I can't find.

Eva


Quoting steviechick:

How did you meet this guy?  I'm having problems actually meeting a guy.  LOL!

What about asking the kids' friends if they can spend some time with them while you go out on a date?  Sleepovers at their place and then you invite the kids over to your place the following weekend? 


 

NaviHope
by Member on Mar. 11, 2013 at 10:01 AM

 I started out just trying to be with/hang/socialize with people first before I even tried to meet a man.  It had been so long for me just being out socially that I felt out of place.  I joined a few meet up groups, reconnected with some girl friends from Facebook and then started being open to meeting guys.  It's tough out there after being married for so long.  You might have to start slow with just being social and the more you are out, the more opportunities you have to meet people.  Good luck.

Eva


Quoting kmarsh3:

That is too funny...I am wondering also how to meet people. I just didn't want to post it. I have been by myself for three years, and my ex is already getting remarried...Crazy since he is the one who cheated throuh the whole marriage, and here I am trying to remember what a date feels like.

 

Quoting steviechick:

How did you meet this guy?  I'm having problems actually meeting a guy.  LOL!

What about asking the kids' friends if they can spend some time with them while you go out on a date?  Sleepovers at their place and then you invite the kids over to your place the following weekend? 

 

 


 

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Mar. 11, 2013 at 10:45 AM
1 mom liked this

When you are ready you will make it work!!  I am in a long distance relationship and it's tough, but we make it work.  Things have gotten pretty serious and I can see him being the one!!

kmarsh3
by on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:18 PM
I have tried method, but feel so out of place when in big crowds. They all seem to know each other and I'm not one for jumping in people conversation


Quoting NaviHope:

 I started out just trying to be with/hang/socialize with people first before I even tried to meet a man.  It had been so long for me just being out socially that I felt out of place.  I joined a few meet up groups, reconnected with some girl friends from Facebook and then started being open to meeting guys.  It's tough out there after being married for so long.  You might have to start slow with just being social and the more you are out, the more opportunities you have to meet people.  Good luck.


Eva




Quoting kmarsh3:


That is too funny...I am wondering also how to meet people. I just didn't want to post it. I have been by myself for three years, and my ex is already getting remarried...Crazy since he is the one who cheated throuh the whole marriage, and here I am trying to remember what a date feels like.


 


Quoting steviechick:


How did you meet this guy?  I'm having problems actually meeting a guy.  LOL!


What about asking the kids' friends if they can spend some time with them while you go out on a date?  Sleepovers at their place and then you invite the kids over to your place the following weekend? 


 


 




 


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)