Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

Dating/new relationships and single mommyhood

Posted by   + Show Post

I'm finding it very hard to date/have a new relationship and balance time as a single working mom.  After the Ex left, I didn't date for a year or so.  Over the summer the kids spend with their dad, I met someone who I get along really well with.  We began seeing each other and then the kids came back.  It's been tough trying to fit this new love interest in my life.  I don't have a sitter lined up so I rely on my parents and when they visit their dad (which is not consistent).  I am taking it slow and do not wish to do things with the new man and my kids.  If any of you ladies are in this situation, do you find it hard to date or find time for a new relationship when you have children?  Any advice on how to balance all of this?

Eva

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:20 AM
Replies (11-16):
kmarsh3
by on Mar. 13, 2013 at 6:11 PM

Thanks Eva,

I have joined some meetup groups in the area that I live in, but still nothing. Some of the meetups are so big that you feel over whelmed plus the people already know each other and talk to them only. Most of my friends are married and they all say they do not know any decent men....smh.

Thanks for the suggestions

Wishing you all the best.

Karen


Quoting NaviHope:

 I started out just trying to be with/hang/socialize with people first before I even tried to meet a man.  It had been so long for me just being out socially that I felt out of place.  I joined a few meet up groups, reconnected with some girl friends from Facebook and then started being open to meeting guys.  It's tough out there after being married for so long.  You might have to start slow with just being social and the more you are out, the more opportunities you have to meet people.  Good luck.

Eva


Quoting kmarsh3:

That is too funny...I am wondering also how to meet people. I just didn't want to post it. I have been by myself for three years, and my ex is already getting remarried...Crazy since he is the one who cheated throuh the whole marriage, and here I am trying to remember what a date feels like.


Quoting steviechick:

How did you meet this guy?  I'm having problems actually meeting a guy.  LOL!

What about asking the kids' friends if they can spend some time with them while you go out on a date?  Sleepovers at their place and then you invite the kids over to your place the following weekend? 







Tinkergirl1997
by on Mar. 13, 2013 at 6:28 PM
I'm not the one to ask.been single with kids for fifteen years.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Shyandteyamommy
by on Mar. 13, 2013 at 11:50 PM
I totally understand I'm not even going to try to date again anytime soon. It's just too much for me. I have two toddlers with different fathers and neither make a point to be there. The first one has t been around Since she was born and the second wasn't really Around much but was around just enough just to have sex with me an he broke things off with me two weeks Ago he just said he wAsnt the one for me. I'm only 21 that has to raise two kids alone so I don't think I'm going to look for a man anytime soon I'm going to focuse on getting us a home and going to college because a man may leave me out to dry with another baby to raise.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Nena70
by on Mar. 14, 2013 at 12:04 AM

Our children are our priority.  You can't have a relationship like we did before kids. You have to make time for you to do something for yourself and to spend time with your new man it may only be once a week. You have to discuss it with him and if he is understanding and supportive , then he is a keeper. 

Its important ti make sure that he is a good man , then you know he may be a potential life partner and you can include you kids and spend more time all together.

I wish you much luck and happiness.

NaviHope
by on Mar. 14, 2013 at 8:46 AM

 I know what you mean Nena70.  I am really looking differently at the quality of man this time around because there are children involved.  You're right, I don't have a lot of time to spend with BF because of the kids but he is understanding and we make time when we can.  I think he is a keeper but I will continue to take it slow.

Eva


Quoting Nena70:

Our children are our priority.  You can't have a relationship like we did before kids. You have to make time for you to do something for yourself and to spend time with your new man it may only be once a week. You have to discuss it with him and if he is understanding and supportive , then he is a keeper. 

Its important ti make sure that he is a good man , then you know he may be a potential life partner and you can include you kids and spend more time all together.

I wish you much luck and happiness.


 

alanasmumma
by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 9:30 PM
1 mom liked this

 I am kind of in the same situation- I've been seeing an amazing man for a while now, he's a single father- he has custody of his 16 year old daughter (who can be more than a handful to say the least) and he has his 6 year old son every other weekend, 1 night for dinner the weeks he doesn't have him on the weekend, and on school breaks/holidays. I have 2 younger daughters myself- an 8 year old and an almost 5 year old. We've both met each other's kids but we try to limit the amount of time we spend with them together because of how easily they get attached. It's kind of a mess trying to figure out time to spend together alone but we are trying.... we haven't set up anything official- we actually are planning to get together tomorrow night and talk so that we don't feel like we are negelecting our relationship. I am going to suggest we plan a date night once a week or every 2 weeks depending on our schedules so that we at least are guaranteed that amount of time. It doesn't take away from our children much and still allows us to be able to focus on our relationship. I'm thinking date night doesn't have to be anything major- even if it's just a night at home watching a movie or something... but that few hours can mean all the difference.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN