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Dating a man with no kids...

Posted by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 5:06 PM
  • 23 Replies
So I have been seeing this guy, for about a month now, we click, I like everything about him, we have tons in common, except I have two kids and he doesn't. My having kids seems to make him supremely uncomfortable. It old him upfront that I had kids and he pursued me anyway, so I thought he was cool with it.
I know we haven't even been dating long, but I don't know if it's even worth continuing the relationship. I like him, alot. But my kids are my priority and I don't know if he will ever come to accept them. I don't know if I should just give him some more time or walk away now. What do you ladies think?
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by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 5:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Robsessed98
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 5:15 PM
Where are all the no kid men coming from? I seriously didn't even meet, let alone date, a man without kids ever in 14 years after having mine. Then I married what I thought was the only childless man around. Nope, we've been separated 7 months and I have only met one guy with kids and 4 with none. Wtf? It's weird. Anyway... If he seems more uncomfortable about them now than at first, odds are he's not a keeper. Have you introduced them? That's usually an excellent time to size up his potential, but a month is a little early for that imo. I'd say talk to him. Tell him you're sensing some hesitation or discomfort and see where he's at. It's better to find out now if he gets to hang around or not rather than when you've gotten attached. Good luck.
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Ali5683
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 5:54 PM

Be honest and ask him about it. If he doesn't flat out tell you he is completely ok with your kids then dump him and move on. Or, trust your instincts and dump him anyway. Your kids are more important and you seem to have a great head on your shoulders. I don't know if I'll ever want to date a man who doesn't have children considering they have NO clue what it's like to be a parent and the sacrifices it takes. Good luck. :)

virginiamama71
by Carrie on Mar. 21, 2013 at 6:47 PM

 If I had a feeling a man would not accept my child than I would have to let him go.

Our children come first, men come and go.

teresanteens
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 6:57 PM
1 mom liked this

 I'd go with your gut feeling. It's obvious to you, he is'nt into your kids,he sounds like the type of man,that expects you, to put your kids on a shelf when he around you and he is having a problem sharing you with your kids,major red flag!

just4ds10ee
by Bronze Member on Mar. 21, 2013 at 7:04 PM
1 mom liked this

A dear friend of mines dated and married a man with no kids, she on the other hand has two boys...he never bonded with them and they were married for about five years. She thought at first he did not like kids...WTH...he knew she had two boys...then she met his niece and she said she could not believe how well they were together... just never bonded with her boys... needless to say she chose her sons over this man and they are divorced today...

BennyBaby09
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:03 PM
Well he has met one of my children, and it went well. He played with him and was very understanding when he got a little cranky etc, but he is still scared of the idea of things possibly getting serious one day, because of the kids. I just don't know what to do
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LovingMy2x4
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 2:33 PM

Is it possible he is afraid of becoming attached? I dated my BIL's best friend very briefly. Like 3 weeks. I could tell he really liked me, but I just wasnt feeling it and I ended it. He told my BIL he was happy I did, but he was becoming attached to my kids and didnt want to completely fall for them and then lose them later in life.

*Not that he ever had or lost them. I've known him since before they were born and see him all the time still, we share a godchild. They never knew we were dating.

steviechick
by Gold Member on Mar. 22, 2013 at 2:35 PM

My mom ended up marrying my step-dad when he was a single guy for a very long time.  He was married before (for a short time) and fathered a son.  He's been with mom going on 40 years this Oct.  He ended up marrying my mom who was a single mother of four kids.  That was unheard of back in the 70's.  It's actually unheard of now, LOL!  Some men are just simply ready or fall in love with and simply accept kids that come with the 'package'.  Since you have only been with this guy for a month, it's too soon in my opinion.  Give it some more time.  If he truly likes you he will learn to like the kids.  They are a package deal.

Things1and2mom
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 2:41 PM

A man with out kids a rare find lol ! No i think you shouldn't write him off just yet .You should have him meet both of your children see how it goes, him not having kids  it may just be hard for him to deal with children . It may be a new learning experience for him . Now on the other hand if your gut is screaming at you this isn't going to work  then save your self from getting caught up with feeling for a man who cant deal with you having children .

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:38 PM
I agree. Good luck mama!!!

Quoting Ali5683:

Be honest and ask him about it. If he doesn't flat out tell you he is completely ok with your kids then dump him and move on. Or, trust your instincts and dump him anyway. Your kids are more important and you seem to have a great head on your shoulders. I don't know if I'll ever want to date a man who doesn't have children considering they have NO clue what it's like to be a parent and the sacrifices it takes. Good luck. :)

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