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8wks Preggers Single, alone and worried

Hey ladies I am 8weeks pregnant tomorrow I am 26 and this is my first child. I got pregnant and he left me I have no family except my sister. I want my child very much so but I'm worried as to how I will make it. I have my own apartment, and car which is already a struggle to keep up now . I only make about 1300-1400 a month rent is 410 lights are roughly 100 car note 250 and insurance 140 phone 120 as u see I am all in.. please can somebody give me some kind of encouragement please I don't want abortion or adoption. I feel like there may be some hope in the end for me that I just don't see today.
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by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 9:13 PM
Replies (11-12):
by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 8:31 PM

Hi there! First off *hugs* It'll work out!  I have almost the same story!  I'm 29, found out I was pregnant when I was 28, the day I found out, I told the sperm donor (he is unworthy of the title father), I had to force him to let me see him the morning we found out and that was the last time I saw him.  I was working one full time job and had just taken on a second.  Thankfully my parents support me 110% even though it's been an adjustment for my dad (he actually told me I couldn't stay at their house after work, I had to get the baby and go home...that didn't fly and now he or my mom comes and steals her on my days off because they don't get to see her lol!).

Here are some of the steps I took because even with two jobs I still barely cleared $1400 a month.  I got rid of my unnecessary expenses, did what I could to cut my necessary expenses.  See about getting cheaper insurance.  It doesn't hurt to shop around or look at your current policy to see about getting rid of things you don't need (example, my policy automatically has roadside assistance on it, but I have AAA, so I got rid of that).  Of course, alot of these steps I had taken because I went from making $13.60/hr to minimum wage a few months before I got pregnant.

I also checked into things like WIC (be prepared to eat ALOT of cereal!).  Tennessee has TennCare for pregnant women, so I got on that along with my health insurance I already had through work.  They do offer a program called Families First here, but I'm not eligible for it and we will lose our TennCare because I refuse to pursue the s.d. for child support.  I know in Tennessee we have diaper programs, breast feeding classes...lots of different things through our local health departments.

Also, do NOT worry about buying brand new stuff.  I bought TONS of baby cloths from local thrift stores that still had the tags on them or were like brand new.  

I have no advise on the child care options though :-( I'm struggling there myself.  Everyone's all "ooh she's so cute, I'll watch her any time!" and then when I need it they bail so my parents keep her when I work.  I did make arrangements for her to have god parents though.  It's not in writing but since I didn't put the s.d.'s name on the birth certificate, he doesn't have much in the way of rights...and I'm fairly certain he knows what would happen to him if he came after her at this point.

Also, I learned this the hard way, you will find out who your parents are during all of this.

Welcome and congratulations! If you need to talk feel free to message me!

by on Mar. 25, 2013 at 1:34 PM
Damn I wish my rent was 410! Where do you live? you can make it work. I had my kid when I was 20. I had nothing, but i'm doing so good now. Also, meeting other single moms can be a big help. not sure if you're religious or not, but I always pray. And I always say to myself, "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me". It makes me feel better., because truly, he'll never give you more than thug can bear :-)
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