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How do you calm an angry child?

Posted by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 12:40 PM
  • 8 Replies
I have an issue with my son...it getting kind of out of hand. He is 9 and is a very emotional child. When the world isn't going his way (which is most if the time) he either gets very angry, which results in physical and verbal aggression to who ever is in the line of fire or he breaks into uncontrollable crying. I have noticed that he isn't a very good communicator. So to try to resolve that issue, I often find myself saying things like it looks like you are angry or sad or confused, how can I help you fix that. When he becomes aggressive, I immediately tell him that it is unacceptable and ask him to go to his room until he can control himself physically and verbally. I have asked his doc and she sent him to a behavioral theripist that has him on a reward and cnsequence system. We have been doing this for about 6 month and I see very little change. Is there something else I can do? Is this normal? If he is having these issues now, what is going to happen when he becomes a teenager with hormones, attitude and want of independance? Suggestions?
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 12:40 PM
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Replies (1-8):
tyfry7496
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 12:50 PM
1 mom liked this
Get a different counselor. Talking to him while he's out of control won't work. Wait until he calms down and then talk to him. He needs help recognizing when he's getting out if control. He needs help verbalizibg how he's feeling. He needs to be taught coping skills. All things a behavioral counselor should be doing.
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steviechick
by Gold Member on Mar. 27, 2013 at 1:11 PM

What she said. ^^

dawncs
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 3:10 PM

I recommend getting another counselor, too. Aggression is not normal as a part of getting his own way. You might want to talk to a developmental pediatrician or another psychologist to get more help for him. You might want to check out http://www.aspergersyndrome.org/ and http://www.autism-society.org/.

Dawn


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (http://www.cafemom.com/group/118648)

Chanel5nyc
by Shanell on Mar. 27, 2013 at 3:17 PM
I do breathing technics with my kids. I have a temper and so do my kids. Sometimes a simple inhale and exhale makes a person feel better.

Also maybe he should see a counselor.
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brieri
by Platinum Member on Mar. 27, 2013 at 3:26 PM

 easter eggWelcome to the group.  Find another therapist for a more thorough eval.

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Mar. 27, 2013 at 4:51 PM
I agree find another counselor my son I have to do deep breething and counting by the time we get to 0 he's calm and then takes his quiet time an then we talk. Talking to a mad kid or anyone doesn't work
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Robsessed98
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 6:38 PM
I'd go to an actual child psychologist instead of behavioral therapy. There are several physical and/or psychological reasons that could be the problem.
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vjolly76
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 10:36 PM

I have learned very quickly that trying to talk with him while he is angry doesn't work.  I will look into another theripist or a psycologist.  The only thing I am sure about is that something has got to change...thanks to all!!!!!!!!!!!!

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