Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

Ex's mother messaged me on FB

Posted by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:11 PM
  • 44 Replies

Soooooo My ex's mother messaged me on FB. I'm torn on how to respond. 

Her son has a court order to have visitation but hasn't seen my son in almost 3 years. He just now contacted me 3 weeks ago asking to have my son call him and I said "per court order, you're supposed to call him not my son call you! You have my number, it hasn't changed in over 4+ years, learn how to pick up the phone for calling him instead of everyone else." 

He has yet to still call. His parents have never called my son before, never bought my son so much as a birthday present, have bad mouthed me because I refused to move to Toledo (1 1/2 hrs away from where my family is, the only family my sons know) because it's more convenient for his son who has an issue with keeping a job and they expect me to uproot and start all over. Mind you... my ex and I haven't been together for 11 years and they are still trash talking me. 

So what would you do in this situation? Below is the the message!

This is what she said on FB to me:

I am Paul's mom. I would like your permission to keep in touch with Manny. I would love to be able to call and talk with him sometime, but only if you will allow us. You can call us @ XXX-XXX-XXXX and let us know. I hope you are both doing well and I look forward to hearing from you.

***EDIT***

Sorry for the confusion... my son is 12 almost 13... his father and I haven't been together for 11 years. There is no court date yet.... I'm wanting to take him back so that he can get even more restrictions on visitation or none preferably since he has a problem with following them now.... We just don't have the $$$ for it right now. 

My son knows it's his decision on whether he wants his sperm donor and his family in his life. Honestly... my son wants more to do with my ex's now ex wife and her family than his sperm donor. So that tells you where his loyalty lies. He knows his sperm donor rather be with other females... he told me that his sperm donor was cheating on his step mother before his step mother told me. He told me one day "Paul is seeing some girl behind Becca's back. Is that how a marriage is supposed to be? Because Paul said that Becca and him had an open marriage but Becca doesn't know about the girl and I need to keep a secret about it!" 

Yes he calls his sperm donor Paul.... there is no reason to call him dad since he doesn't act like one and that was my son's decision.

Follow my weight loss Journey.... I have a weightloss goal to hit 135-140lbs by Oct 2012....Can I do it by changing the weigh I eat, using Body By Vi , and exercising more? We shall see!!!! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/luvmykidz04


Wedding Countdown Ticker


by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:11 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:14 PM
2 moms liked this

Not too sure..guess that is something you need to decide ....good luck!


Luv.My.Kidz
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:16 PM

Yeah I know... I'm just worried on how I would respond if I would. A piece of me wants to go completely off on them.

Quoting Mommyto2LilMen:

Not too sure..guess that is something you need to decide ....good luck!



Follow my weight loss Journey.... I have a weightloss goal to hit 135-140lbs by Oct 2012....Can I do it by changing the weigh I eat, using Body By Vi , and exercising more? We shall see!!!! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/luvmykidz04


Wedding Countdown Ticker


xixCandyxix
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:16 PM

How old is your son? Is he 11 or is he older than that?? Seriously I would just ignore the dad because at this age your son is probably realizing what a loser his dad is. Don't let him talk to the grandparents either it honestly sounds like they are up to no good!

GoldenLinds
by Member on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:22 PM
4 moms liked this
I'd ignore it. Once you respond you've opened the door to that line of communication and you'll gwt flooded. If your ex has a ciurt date they can wait until then. Afyer that their son can facilitate communication for them.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Luv.My.Kidz
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:24 PM

My son will be 13 in June. 

Quoting xixCandyxix:

How old is your son? Is he 11 or is he older than that?? Seriously I would just ignore the dad because at this age your son is probably realizing what a loser his dad is. Don't let him talk to the grandparents either it honestly sounds like they are up to no good!


Follow my weight loss Journey.... I have a weightloss goal to hit 135-140lbs by Oct 2012....Can I do it by changing the weigh I eat, using Body By Vi , and exercising more? We shall see!!!! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/luvmykidz04


Wedding Countdown Ticker


Fullmoon_Goddes
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:24 PM
I agree.


Quoting GoldenLinds:

I'd ignore it. Once you respond you've opened the door to that line of communication and you'll gwt flooded. If your ex has a ciurt date they can wait until then. Afyer that their son can facilitate communication for them.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Luv.My.Kidz
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:25 PM

There is no court date. I haven't received any papers. The last Visitation order was done in 2008. Nothing since and he hasn't followed it since 2009. 

Quoting GoldenLinds:

I'd ignore it. Once you respond you've opened the door to that line of communication and you'll gwt flooded. If your ex has a ciurt date they can wait until then. Afyer that their son can facilitate communication for them.


Follow my weight loss Journey.... I have a weightloss goal to hit 135-140lbs by Oct 2012....Can I do it by changing the weigh I eat, using Body By Vi , and exercising more? We shall see!!!! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/luvmykidz04


Wedding Countdown Ticker


GoldenLinds
by Member on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:30 PM
I misread! Still though. He needs to grow a pair and stop running to mommy to fix his problem. She sounds like she's digging. I would still ignore it. If he finally makes contact it can be addressed then.

Quoting Luv.My.Kidz:

There is no court date. I haven't received any papers. The last Visitation order was done in 2008. Nothing since and he hasn't followed it since 2009. 

Quoting GoldenLinds:

I'd ignore it. Once you respond you've opened the door to that line of communication and you'll gwt flooded. If your ex has a ciurt date they can wait until then. Afyer that their son can facilitate communication for them.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Luv.My.Kidz
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:33 PM

Like I said... he made contact over 3 weeks ago via FB asking to have my son call him and I told him I wasn't going to have my son call because he had our number and he could call. So you're saying I should just wait until he gets off his ass and actually calls?

Quoting GoldenLinds:

I misread! Still though. He needs to grow a pair and stop running to mommy to fix his problem. She sounds like she's digging. I would still ignore it. If he finally makes contact it can be addressed then.

Quoting Luv.My.Kidz:

There is no court date. I haven't received any papers. The last Visitation order was done in 2008. Nothing since and he hasn't followed it since 2009. 

Quoting GoldenLinds:

I'd ignore it. Once you respond you've opened the door to that line of communication and you'll gwt flooded. If your ex has a ciurt date they can wait until then. Afyer that their son can facilitate communication for them.



Follow my weight loss Journey.... I have a weightloss goal to hit 135-140lbs by Oct 2012....Can I do it by changing the weigh I eat, using Body By Vi , and exercising more? We shall see!!!! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/luvmykidz04


Wedding Countdown Ticker


brieri
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 11:41 PM
2 moms liked this

No, politely tell yor son dad wants to talk to him.  If he wants to call let him, let him.  He's 13 yrs old give the chld a brain and mind  

Qoting Luv.My.Kidz:

Like I said... he made contact over 3 weeks ago via FB asking to have my son call him and I told him I wasn't going to have my son call because he had our number and he could call. So you're saying I should just wait until he gets off his ass and actually calls?

Quoting GoldenLinds:

I misread! Still though. He needs to grow a pair and stop running to mommy to fix his problem. She sounds like she's digging. I would still ignore it. If he finally makes contact it can be addressed then.

Quoting Luv.My.Kidz:

There is no court date. I haven't received any papers. The last Visitation order was done in 2008. Nothing since and he hasn't followed it since 2009. 

Quoting GoldenLinds:

I'd ignore it. Once you respond you've opened the door to that line of communication and you'll gwt flooded. If your ex has a ciurt date they can wait until then. Afyer that their son can facilitate communication for them.



 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)