Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

I need some help from other divorced Mom's!!

Posted by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 10:28 PM
  • 21 Replies

Hello Mom's,

My name is Jenna and I am a divorced mother of 3. They are 6,7, and 9 years old. I am looking for other woman who are divorced and going through the same challenges as I am....

Is there anyone out there who understands what it's like? How do you handle him treating you like sh** for his girlfriend? Talking bad about you?

Thank you,

Jenna

 

by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 10:28 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
mammabear5150
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 10:51 PM
He's a coward. .my ex had to talk shit about me to feel better about himself. Tht way he doesn't have to face the truth. ..he messed up. Its hard to deal with divorce. .its like a death..but don't give up u will pick urself up and move on...cry when u need to..scream if u have to remember there is a reason for everything. Grow from this...love urself and ur babies. ..stay strong !
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
I.spit.glitter
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 10:57 PM

Hi Jenna, I have 3 boys and I just started going through the Divorce. I know we won't have that issue because we do still have a mutual respect for each other even though we're splitting.

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Mar. 29, 2013 at 7:38 AM
Welcome!!!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
breebree04
by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 10:04 AM

Hi Jenna! Welcome to the group. I am divorced and have a 10 and 8 yr old. I have been through this with their dad. His gf (whom I never met) hated me and when they were together (they were on and off again for a few years) he would treat me like shit and call me names. I always knew when they were together or not just based on his attitude towards me. We had a few fights here and there over it but for the most part I would just try to ignore him. If the kids were home with me and he was calling or texting I would just shut my phone off. Good Luck

a06z08mama
by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 10:09 AM
Yes. I feel your pain. My ex says and does shit like that to me. Even tho they are now engaged. "They don't want drama" but refuse to get on the same page for parenting and caring for our children. Ds turned 5 today and dd will be 7 in June. She needs almond milk and singulair every day. She gets her pill but not her milk when she is with him. Its frustrating.

I am trying to not let him get to me. But sometimes when it comes to the kids. I take defense.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
bbyblueAK
by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 10:27 AM
Hi I am a mom of two boys ages 1 and 5 (almost) and I'm fixing to start the divorce process
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
idunno1234
by Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 11:00 AM
1 mom liked this

Divorce sucks, no matter which way you look at it, especially when there are kids involved. 

With the exception of safety issues (that would need to be addressed in court), you really can't control what he does or says when he's with the kids.

However, you can control what you do, including not speaking badly about their dad no matter what he says and does (easier said than done, I know!). If he does something you don't want your kids to think is acceptable, criticize the behavior, not the man and most importantly, you model the correct behavior.  Your children will come to their own conclusions easily enough- children especially hate it when parents speak badly about the other.

Keep putting one foot in front of the other, doing the next right thing.  Do not waste time on past regrets or worry about future unknowns. Just concentrate on what is right in front of you and try to keep anger from clouding your decisions, even if he isn't.

  Its a shitty road but your happiness is well worth the journey and your children will draw their strength from the example you lead.  As hard as that can be sometimes (life, kids- its so freaking draining sometimes), I know my experience going through this has made me a much stronger, more capable person that is an infinitely better role model than the unhappy person I was married to their dad.

virginiamama71
by Carrie on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:28 PM

I am divorced and have one child.

If myself or my ex has said anything bad about the other, we pretty much said it during the marriage, and outside of it, we do not know what we say to others about each other and I hope it stays this way, cause if not its more of a problem for my son to have to deal with this, than it will be for us who should be the mature adults.

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 2:45 PM
1 mom liked this

 yep been through it. it hurt at the time but then i ceased to give a shit and didnt let it control me. refuse to engage in arguments or deal with him and repeatedly tell him "i will talk to you when you can be civil..." also refuse to deal w his gf. you dont have to. kids are yours and his. not hers.

newlife2013
by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 9:38 PM

Hi, I have three kids as well, and Ive had the same problem, but if she allows him to talk about me that way, does she really think they are going to last forever and that when they break up he won't treat her the same way? The new gfs should encourage their boyfriends to talk about someone or something else, it must be ok for new gfs with low morale....

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)