Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

new here-- my story *rediculously long*

Posted by   + Show Post
Hello ladies,

I joined here a week or so ago but I need to introduce myself.
My name is Alyssa, I'm 23, I'm from texas and nearly 24 weeks with my first child (a son)

I met my ex in june 2010 and god was I an idiot from the beginning. By august we were together and he had seperated from his ex that had a bby in may.. not biologically his child but all the same. I believed his story that he was miserable and that he just didn't love her anymore. But that didn't stop him rom screwing her... in my car with the baby present. (Yea I'm an idiot)

Skipping forward (bc there is too much lol) to feb 2012 we got married. I caught him cheating again in nov and I forgave him and I had major surgery in jan to remove an enormous ovarian cyst. Things were better than ever.... for a month. He finally got a job and was sleeping with a girl rom there... who possibly just had his baby in feb.

Finally in june I left. Because I discovered then that he had had that affair and another girl, an ex, told me I needed to readtheir messages and gave me her password.. along with that he finally decided to play daddy to the little girl from the beginning.. whom He never attempted to see (even though I urged him) until june... but that apparently meant staying over in an empty house until 4am or later. I filed for divorce the next day.

So I left and was happy, but then in oct. We both ended up living in the same place. (With sil, we had become super close and his ex kicked him out) well he promised to be better and blah blah blah... I figured we would just have a good time for a little while and then move on.

Well... sure enough after TWO yrs of no protection during sex I end up pregnant that first montg. I knew things weren't good. But I wanted to give my child a chance for a whole family. We still struggled and he was still playing dad (I'm sorry I don't count "babysitting" your "daughrer" a couple of hrs a week being a parent)

Well then in jan I found oyt SHE was pregnant and had been the whole time. I was so hurt and our relationship just went down hill from there. He wanted to spend on day ith her the next with me.. saying that was a "fair" devision of his time (uh what?)

I always suspeted nothing more, attempting to leave more than once and on more than one occassion that ended up me being literally thrwon to the ground and held there even though I waz screaming for help and hyperventalating. (No one did) he had Never been like that before I was pregnant.

The only thing I gave him a rule on when it came to our child is that if he cheated... again he would have zero involvement in our sons life. I would not have my son believing that this was an ok way to treat women. I couldn't do it. Of course he was beyound pissed.

Well who would have guessed.... he was sleeping with the ex the entire time. I figured but did not get proof until last week. Witg him and his silver tongue I needed solid proof. So I told him to leave or I would and he chose to move straight back in with her.

So after a loooonnnngggg story I'm going to raise my son alone. He apparently doesn't want a thing to do with me and doesn't want to be involved until the birth in which I informed him he probably wouldn't be invited to in which he threatened to destroy my life.

I'm scared on how to raise a child alone and how I'm going to keep my son free of all of this toxic situation. I know I made my bed and I'll have to lie in it. But my son is innocent and its my job to keep him safe. From here on out what would you do? I'm due in july and need to get my ducks in a row.

I'm sorry I wrote a book and on my tablet eo sorry for typos. Any advice is appreciated!!!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 12:06 PM
Replies (11-17):
yellownes8
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 3:16 PM
Hello and welcome to the group! I'm a single mom too and although it isn't easy I do what I have to do to take care of my son :)
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Litlmama87
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:01 PM
You knew he was sexually active with multiple women unprotected. God only knows who and what these women were dealing with, last time they received an STD test. Yet you still chose to risk your health and your life, even your unborn child's life for a dirty dick man.

I think above everything else, all the drama, that's the true reality of this situation.


Quoting ajohnson08099:

Umm what's that in reference to exactly?



Quoting Litlmama87:

Nobody gives a fuck about STDs these days.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mamer12812
by Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:39 PM

your doing everything right the good thing is at least you broke up left found out hes a asshole and dont want him around you or your baby so you dont have to go to court about vistion or anything like that you can just freely do everything by yourself the way you want it to be.

spetelle
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 10:37 AM
You're going to be a great mom. The fact that you put your foot down and told that jerk to he out not because of you but because of your son shows that. And don't feel anything about trying to make it work out with him. You want you child to have a family no one with ever fault you for that
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
ajohnson08099
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 2:10 PM
Mmm well thanks for the welcome.. that's all I've got to say.

Quoting Litlmama87:

You knew he was sexually active with multiple women unprotected. God only knows who and what these women were dealing with, last time they received an STD test. Yet you still chose to risk your health and your life, even your unborn child's life for a dirty dick man.



I think above everything else, all the drama, that's the true reality of this situation.




Quoting ajohnson08099:

Umm what's that in reference to exactly?





Quoting Litlmama87:

Nobody gives a fuck about STDs these days.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
kitcal78
by Gigi on Apr. 6, 2013 at 1:43 AM
Welcome to the group. You will find a lot of support here. It sounds like your ex will end up being a child support trouble maker. Depending on what state you live in the judge won't allow overnight visit s until the child past breastfeed ing age. If it comes down to going to court think about safety concerns. How you want visitation and financial support.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
ajohnson08099
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 8:12 AM
Thank you. Hopefully it will all work out for the best.

Quoting kitcal78:

Welcome to the group. You will find a lot of support here. It sounds like your ex will end up being a child support trouble maker. Depending on what state you live in the judge won't allow overnight visit s until the child past breastfeed ing age. If it comes down to going to court think about safety concerns. How you want visitation and financial support.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)