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Struggling financially as a single mom

Posted by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:10 PM
  • 20 Replies
1 mom liked this

I have a pretty big financial problem and have no idea how to fix it.  I currently work full time, have a 2 bedroom apartment that I pay $900 per month for, and pay $967 to child care each month (my daughter is in full time daycare, and my son in before and after care).  My ex just stopped paying child support because he doesn't have any money to give me.  He filed child support a little while ago, but, since he had no money to give me, the support order was put on hold until May 20, when hopefully he'll have money, but it doesn't look like it is going to happen.  At that point, it can either be postponed again, or he can withdraw it altogether.  Either way, I'm not getting anything.

I can't pay for the apartment, childcare (and camp this summer), bills, insurance (car and medical), and student loan by myself, never mind the gas, food, and clothes/shoes for my two children.  I am working extra jobs on the weekends (cleaning and direct selling - Silpada) that my ex has visitation, but it still isn't enough.  I don't have cable, and have cut expenses wherever I could.

My dad is 72, my mom is no longer living, my sister has a chronic illness, my brother lives in another state, and my inlaws still work full time.  Family isn't an option, unfortunately.  

My daughter will be in kindergarten this fall, but it is a half day.  I would still have to put out $420 for her, and $200 for my son for before/aftercare.  I could change school districts to one with a full day kindergarten, but that would mean a new apartment (I have no money to put down) and it would be mid school year.

Help, anyone?  How do single moms make this work?  If I work part time, I'll still be short on cash.  I could possibly work part time, M-F 9 - 2:30 so I can drop off and pick up, but would have to definitely work nights and weekends to make up for that money.  I would need to find reliable people to watch the kids on those nights.  And then I won't have the insurance coverage I have now with my full time job.  I am thinking that this may be the only option, however, this doesn't help with summer camp.  I make too much to qualify for any sort of government assistance.

I would appreciate any and all feedback!!  Thanks so much in advance.

by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
breebree04
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:21 PM

Unfortunately I am in a similar situation. I use to get PA but now Im just over the income limit to  qualify and Im trying to figure out how I am going to manage all the bills on my own plus pay for daycare, especially during the summer since they will be there 5 days a week, all day. Luckily I do have my parents to help when needed but they live an hour away so they cant help everyday. Since your ex isnt paying cs is it possible for him to keep the kids while you work? That would atleast cut out your childcare expense. When you do go back to court make sure they add in half of the childcare cost to his cs too so its not all on you

brieri
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:32 PM

 School District - you don't necessarily have to move if you want to change school districts it's called a inter-transfer call the school to find out what it takes to have her transferred there or all your kids and also let them know of your situation, they can probably help you in some way without having to move.

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:54 PM

*HUGS* guud luck to you mama....

amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:30 PM

This is a good idea.

Also, check into daycamps at places like the Y.  The often have scholarship (or partial scholarship) programs that you may qualify for.

Quoting brieri:

 School District - you don't necessarily have to move if you want to change school districts it's called a inter-transfer call the school to find out what it takes to have her transferred there or all your kids and also let them know of your situation, they can probably help you in some way without having to move.


flprincessmom
by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:52 PM

 look into the summer camps through the boys and girls clubs, and parks & rec. or the "Y".. When my son was younger I used to put him in the camps through them. And if you are a struggling parent, they often times are free with just the cost of field trips to the local public pool or something similar.  I think the most I paid in one week was like $25.  but that was over 5 years ago.....Also, look into rent reduced housing...When my daughter was born in'06 I had to make the decision of working and having ALL +some of my income go to bills & daycare & food with NOTHING left over, or not working and just have the child support as income, and still struggling but not having that huge child care bill....and to find a daycare that would take her as a school aged child during the day (she is home-schooled) is nearly impossible as they pretty much only take preschoolers during school hours....Good Luck to ya mamma...((((hugs))))

Maryloe
by Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:30 PM
I agree with inter transfer. It is a process but well worth it. I am not sure how much you make but you could to the welfare office to ask for assistance or resources. Some help to pay for child care and rent. You can ask for scholarship to cover their recreational activities. You maybe eligible for food stamps.
You are doing well. It is not easy when you doing it all on your own. Things always work out.
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Ali32
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:39 PM

Could you possibly find a roommate to help with bills? Or a roommate that would watch the kids in exchange for free rent? (obviously you would need to do a background/reference check, etc)

unspecified42
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:40 PM
1 mom liked this
You could also see about putting your loans into deferment for financial hardship.
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arkmomma06
by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:48 PM

Thats a tough question, since so many of us are in a similar situation...


Maybe a roommate is a option for you...group hug

Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 8:53 PM
I was going to suggest this as well.


Quoting unspecified42:

You could also see about putting your loans into deferment for financial hardship.

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