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Friends giving advice

Posted by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 2:01 PM
  • 17 Replies

My daughter's Godmother has instructed me my daughter SHOULD be crawling and sitting up at 7 months. This may or may not be true, but I did not appreciate the instructions that she is below her level. I politely said, "everyone has their own way of raising their kids and I appreciate her advice, but my daughter will advance at her age at her own pace." She replied to me that "I always ask for advice and if I don't want it, to not ask for it, because she will ALWAYS tell you whats on her mind."

We are currently not talking and I told her to leave me alone, because she continuously ranted and raved at me through text messages.

Again, I appreciate comments and advice and always welcome it, but if it becomes an issue of my child is not growing at the right level, I will speak my mind as well.

I like my friend and I don't want to lose her friendship, which is what I told her and she replied "if you're going to lose a friend over something like this...thats sad." --- thats when I told her we were both at work and we'll talk about it later. She again- ranted not to ask for advice if I don't want it.

This all stemmed from our meeting yesterday and  me accidentally slipping by saying, "what the heck?" and her daughter repeating my words. Apparently I cussed a lot yesterday and she didn't appreciate that. I can completely understand her concern for this, so I apologized twice. I don't really understand a lot of my friends and some times I can almost predict our friendship having trouble (mostly when we hang out too much or we have a conflict of interest). I value everyone I meet and I know everyone has their issues, but I don't find it fair to accuse my daughter of slowly advancing to crawling and sitting up. It really offended me and I did my best to be polite and mature about the situation, but ...I don't know. What are your thoughts? ......

by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 2:01 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Bookoholic
by Bronze Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 2:07 PM
Check with your Dr about the crawling Ds started crawling around 7/8 months he was a preemie though. As far as cussing why not try and eliminate it all together? I do cuss in front of ds but not often and he knows not to repeat it. But even before that I made it a priority not to sware or not often. Also if I am around someone who does it with every other word I try and ask them to realize my son does repeat what he hears and if she/he could kindly watch what they say I'd appreciate it, it is my son and while they don't have to I still ask.
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KrEnChIk21
by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 2:40 PM

 


Quoting Bookoholic:

Check with your Dr about the crawling Ds started crawling around 7/8 months he was a preemie though. As far as cussing why not try and eliminate it all together? I do cuss in front of ds but not often and he knows not to repeat it. But even before that I made it a priority not to sware or not often. Also if I am around someone who does it with every other word I try and ask them to realize my son does repeat what he hears and if she/he could kindly watch what they say I'd appreciate it, it is my son and while they don't have to I still ask.

thank-you for your advice. have a great day!

 

steviechick
by Gold Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 2:47 PM
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My daughter scooted on her rearend when she was a baby. I think she was somewhere between 6-9 months.  She never really 'crawled'.  Her dr said it was normal and that not all babies 'crawl'. 

I tried not to cuss in front of my daughter when she was little.  However, my ex cussed up a storm.  Used the 'F' bomb all the time.  I gave him dirty looks and told him many times to watch what he said.  Interesting thing though whenever his parents were around he was on his best behavior.   My daughter was smart though.  He knew that I didn't cuss and the many times I gave her father a hard time was the reason NOT to cuss.  Today she uses the words 'crap' all the time.  I hope to never ever hear her cuss around me.

brieri
by Platinum Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 4:14 PM
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coffeemuffinFor you.  Welcome to the group. 

brieri
by Platinum Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 4:18 PM
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 My conclusion here:  You must have said something to the effect about what age shoulda child be crawling.  Next time if you are need of any advice, get it from a book or your doctor.  Good luck.

KRIZZ25
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i wish my heart would just stop.
Yesterday at 7:04 PM
by Platinum Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 4:22 PM
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tell her its ur child not her,s so back the fuck up.. ur will do it wen she wont's ..
Robsessed98
by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 6:14 PM
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My rule is don't give advice or opinion about others kids and when others give theirs, tell them thanks, but you will ask when you want their input. Babies advance at their own pace. My oldest crawled at 5 mos and walked, actually she ran and hasn't stopped, at 9 mos. Youngest crawled at 9 mos and walked at 13 mos. Both of them were and still are perfectly normal with above average IQs. Cussing is hard to filter and isn't a good idea, bit they will be exposed to it at some point. Just teach them right from wrong words.
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Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Apr. 18, 2013 at 7:51 AM
I agree. And yes kids advance at their own pace. If you are taking your child to her well visits they will be asking you about milestones. At that point if they are concerned they will talk to you about it.

Quoting Robsessed98:

My rule is don't give advice or opinion about others kids and when others give theirs, tell them thanks, but you will ask when you want their input. Babies advance at their own pace. My oldest crawled at 5 mos and walked, actually she ran and hasn't stopped, at 9 mos. Youngest crawled at 9 mos and walked at 13 mos. Both of them were and still are perfectly normal with above average IQs. Cussing is hard to filter and isn't a good idea, bit they will be exposed to it at some point. Just teach them right from wrong words.
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cholita1978
by Member on Apr. 18, 2013 at 7:56 AM
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She would have freaked at my dd, she didnt start walking until she was 18 months, what part of every child is different/ grows up different doesn't she get?
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KrEnChIk21
by on Apr. 18, 2013 at 1:38 PM

 


Quoting cholita1978:

She would have freaked at my dd, she didnt start walking until she was 18 months, what part of every child is different/ grows up different doesn't she get?


 Thank-you for your reply! What is a dd?

THANK-YOU!! Thats what everyone tells me, but she was out of line and she knows it. Naturally..after I (which I shouldn't have done) put a comment on facebook, she did the EXACT same thing.

She's acting like a word that rhymes with witch right now and I'm starting to regret making her the Godmother. This behavior is something you address in Middle School. Even the Elementary students I work with act better than her. Gosh, I'm so hateful today.. :)

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