So, my kids father and i were together almost 5 years. a year and a half of that he was in jail. the rest of the time after that he got bad into drugs-this was after we had 2 kids. Neither of the kids have his name on the certificate, though they do have his last name-a mistake on my part apparently. I have been too scared to stand up and go, because he is not stable, and did i mention drugs? anyway. I finally have met someone that has helped me realize it's time to stand up for my girls and myself, and stop enabling him, which includes keeping his kids from him. He has never bought a diaper, a bottle, clothes, food, anything for these children, and now he's stressing about wanting to see these kids. This is a guy who sits in his one room he rents and smokes with his two highly asthmatic children and not give a damn that he is hurting them. He has never paid anything for them, and couldn't tell me what size clothes or diapers they wear if I asked him now. I changed my phone number, and blocked his email, and so he sent the cops to check on me. I now have the cops helping me, but now he has resorted to calling me at work, which i ignore and have on vm. he says all he wants is to see his children, but if i let him do that, that is giving him access to me, and he will just take advantage of me all over again, and i refuse to let that happen. I just got a new house and new car and a raise at work, and i am trying to make a better life for my children. it's frustrating and scary, but at the same time i know what i'm doing is right-and i have to be strong for once in my life. they told me i have to have a lawyer for a restraining order, and can file for a warrant based on harrassment, but i need something more immediate-and it scares me a little what he might, could try to do.
i don't know if i'm looking for advice or sympathy, or just need someone to vent to-but i just wanted to post this. thanks for listening.
A child's smile can brighten even the darkest of days.