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This is kind of a premature question bc I'm only 26 weeks with my first... but how do/would you handle if your child had other half siblings?

Ex has a son on tge way with his ex (who he's currently with) and claims her other two kids. To me... I want notging to do with the whol lot of them. To me my son is it.. because I really dont expect bd to be around. I can see having to tell my son he does have at leazt one bio sibling... but I think id rather stick my feet in lava before saying those other two kids are anything to me. Just because HE says they are "his" doesn't mean I have to pretend to does it?

To me my son is an only child... idk if he will have siblings because I never planned on doing the "mor than one baby daddy" thing anyway (daling with this asshole is enough) am I wrong??
by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 10:03 AM
Replies (41-41):
Armygirl2299703
by on May. 10, 2013 at 2:51 AM

 I always knew the basic, kid can understand stuff of my bio dad not being around and of my older sister since her picures were in my moms photo album. The first son of my dads is a year or so younger then the brother my mom gave me at 4yrs old so naturally I didn't know about him then since it would be a hard thing for such a young child to understand. About 7yrs later my dad had anoter son. I think I was about 7-8yrs old when my mom sat me down and told me more about why he wasn't around and that I had two younger brothers. I've never thought of them any different, as I don't the half brothers that the brother I grew up has as well due to his dad getting married later in life and have 2 sons. To us, we have my brother in common and therefor are brother and sister. Now I don't know how my older sister and her/our 2 brothers feel about the siblings I grew up with but to each thier own.


Quoting ajohnson08099:

:/ I understand your point of view. And I think you are right. I'm trying to decide I guess to allow these other children to be in my sons life from the start or something he is told about when hez older.

I never in a lillion years thought tgis would be how things worked out but such is life.

Just to me my son is the oldest child. The big brother (someday) not the baby out of four.


Quoting Armygirl2299703:

I think that your child should know he has a half sibling. I completely agree that the other two kids mean nothing to your child because there is no biological tie between them and your son. He can claim all the kids in the world and it doesn't make them your sons siblings. I think it would be wrong to keep such information from your son.Now, let me explain why because I'm not at all trying to bash or insult you. I was convieved out of wedlock, no big deal. My mom met a "charming soldier" who had just lost his wife a few months previously in a car accident and they had a 3yr old daughter (obviously my older half sister). He was overjoyed when my mom was pregnant, until they found out they were expecting a girl. He kicked my mom out on the streets pregnant and with nowhere to go. He was mad because in his eyes I couldn't be his because he WANTED a boy. Couple weeks later he has a new woman in my moms place taking care of my sister. They were obviously envolved on the side. From that marriage enters 2 boys. All thier lives they were NEVER told about me. I however knew about them all from the start. When my mom left she stole some pictures of my sister that she had taken because she knew it would be a cold day in hell probably before he would see me. Thirty-one years later I still haven't met him. I've met my brothers, against our dads will since the older one was of age and the youngest was living with our cousin at the time and approved the meeting. I've not met my older sister face/face because she lives in Nevada and I'm in Alaska where we were all born/raised. We do talk almost daily though via facebook/texting. We all felt cheated out of a relationship we should've been able to have despite the situation. My youngest brother went over the edge when he found out about me, he had always wanted another sister and fell into a bad drug addiction that nearly killed him. He's clean now thankfully and we're close. Siblings should know about each other at some point so that even if the parents don't have a good relationship and parent together then at least the children can make the choice to have contact or not. None of us hold anything against each other, we all put the blame on our dad where it belongs. If your son later found out he had a brother/sister out there he could very well be extremely pissed off and take things out on you the way my youngest brother did to our dad and you never know how/where things might go at that point. I'm not saying he'll turn to drugs, we all deal with such things differently but it could possibly put your guys' relationship in jeapardy. Of course it's all your decision in the end.


I'm glad that I will never have to deal with something like this as you are. We were lucky to even get my daughter, much less would he ever have any more kids. The only half siblings that she will ever see will be from me. I wish you the best mama.


 

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