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abandoned by baby father at 11W, not 27W n he has a GF

Posted by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 6:35 PM
  • 21 Replies

One day he wants to reconcile and work on us because "he wants nothing more that to be with the baby and the mother of his baby and raise his child in the same household" and the nex day he has a girlfriend (whom is the female he cheated on me with and left me fore) and he can no longer "speak to me like that and tell me sweet nothings behind his "gf" back"  he says " yeah it would be ideal for us to raise our child and be together, but does he take another chance with me or does he stay where he is, and where he is with this girl is not as complicated and crazy as me" he says " i have a lot to think about, does he try with me and be with me n baby or does he stay where he is at?"

all these things he says literally makes me sick to my stomach, i treated him like a king and all he did was run around and cheat on me. He would beg for forgiveness and a second chance and I gave him a million second chances.

I am 7months pregant and he has been MIA since i was 11 weeks. This baby was planned and we did not attempt to prevent pregnacy and he said he wanted nothng more than getting a home with me and raising a family.

He propsed, we were house hunting, we were moving on with on plans. Then he up and leaves me.

Abandon me and his child and months later says he is with her now but he doesnt love her, he says he cares for her and she treats him great and he dont want to break her heart.

how could he put her heart before mine and our baby?

how could he run away like a coward?

5 years i was with him and i cannot understand how he could abandon me in my time of need and choose another female over his child

 

i dont understand why

by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 6:35 PM
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Replies (1-10):
virginiamama71
by Carrie on Apr. 25, 2013 at 6:52 PM
7 moms liked this
All the problems have always been there but you gave too much of yourself instead of paying attention. Let him go, he is not worth more pain.
sthflachk
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 6:54 PM
2 moms liked this
Girl....leave that man alone. File with the state and cs before your baby is born and move on. They DON'T change.
dawncs
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 6:58 PM
2 moms liked this

Please take it that he will lead you on with the relationship for a long time. However, you should when the baby is born file for child support. You can do it through the county court house. If he will not be there physically for you and the baby at least he can be there financially for the two of you. I recommend it being garnished through the state, so he will never play games with the checks if he did it directly.

Dawn


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (http://www.cafemom.com/group/118648)

lovebienmom
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 10:25 PM
3 moms liked this

 I agree!

 Let him go now so you can move on with your life. If you believe that the games or cheating will stop you are fooling yourself. If things were complicated before the baby, it will become even more so after the child arrives. Might as well start the process of becoming you and heal. If you dont start now it gets harder, but you will eventually have too. Oh and remember your worth. If you think you deserve this type of treatment then stay and be a victim, otherwise be strong and do whats best for you and that child. Good luck. Im sorry for your pain.


Quoting virginiamama71:

All the problems have always been there but you gave too much of yourself instead of paying attention. Let him go, he is not worth more pain.


 

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Apr. 26, 2013 at 12:24 AM

He sounds like a user walk away i'm sorry you are easy for him when things go bad you will always take him back.

KRIZZ25
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dam ppl...
Today at 6:09 AM
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 12:28 AM
1 mom liked this
I WISH THESE YOUNG MEN ,WOMEN WOULD STOP HOOKING UP WTH EVERY THING WTH A DICK OR PUZZY ..U NEED TO WORRY ABOUT UR SELF ,UR CHILD.. DON'T WORRY ABOUT HIS STUPID ASS. GO ON LIVE UR LIFE.
Lalalonely
by Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 3:10 PM

i dont want him back im just attempting to understand his actions

virginiamama71
by Carrie on Apr. 26, 2013 at 3:44 PM

 His actions are not worth the time to try and understand and even if you could understand his actions it still would not be enough.

He has made his choice and the best choice you can make it to Take care of yourself.

Quoting Lalalonely:

i dont want him back im just attempting to understand his actions

 

ajohnson08099
by Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 3:50 PM
Ooooh whatever. If he had the balls to abandon the mother of his child don't believe tbe bullshit lies of "I don't love her" blah blah. Its probably the same thing he tolx her to get extra oving. I'm 27 weeks too so I feel you.

My bd was kicked out when I was 22 weeks. He was cheating on me, lying, the whole bag of tricks. We had been marrie but had gotten divorce for tgesame crap. He told me he had o interact with his ex for his daughterssake that he didn't kike her but for kids they need to be friends. That he could only see her in tge evening bc of this or that. Well I Finally saw texts calling her baby and so on and since that day he's been with her claiming her kids and all that. It was all bullshit. But where is the friendship for Our kids sake??? Yea guess that was bullshit too.

I know you don't understand. There is no way for a rational person to understand the mind of someone like that. Just do your best hon and worry about your precious little one.
dawncs
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 4:45 PM

 There are some men out there who will never grow out of the cheating phase or having more than one woman at a time. Look at the Playboy magazine founder. He had and supported several women at once until even recently. There are some men who will blame you or the other woman for their actions in life. You have to realize that no one forced him to make that decision in life. Trust me. He will do the same to future women too without a second thought.

Quoting Lalalonely:

i dont want him back im just attempting to understand his actions.

Dawn


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (http://www.cafemom.com/group/118648)

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