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Stepparent Adoption

Posted by on May. 2, 2013 at 2:39 AM
  • 9 Replies

Hey all! I am wondering about stepparent adoptions.  I am going to be getting married soon and my guy wants to adopt my seven year old son.  My son's biological father has never met him, paid child support, or helped out in any way.   I know that the law in Illinois said there are some situations where the adoption process could go quickly.  But I'm just wondering if I am going to have to try to track my ex down just to get him to sign over his rights....even though he's never met his son and his name is not on the birth certificate.  He also knows about the child but has refused to come through.  My soon to be hubby and I are going to be talking to a lawyer about all of this just to see what needs to be done.  But I thought I'd come here and pick everyone's brain first :). 


Oh, and I have never been married.  My son has my maiden name.

by on May. 2, 2013 at 2:39 AM
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krisnkids
by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 8:37 AM

Easiest way and quickest for that matter is for dad to sign the paper giving up his rights. Before talking to the lawyer I would suggest contacting him to see what his position is, that way when you meet with the lawyer you know what you are up against.

MsLiss96
by on May. 2, 2013 at 9:45 AM

Well that's the thing, I already know what I'm up against.  He is very uncooperative.  And even if I were to contact him, he wouldn't sign anything.  He wouldn't even take the DNA test to prove paternity.  Unfortunately, I have my work cut out for me when it comes to dealing with him.

easinpc
by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 9:47 AM
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I don't know how it works but here's a bump for you.  Good luck!!

krisnkids
by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 9:48 AM
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Ugh, men. With the history of him never even having met your son, no child support, refusing paternity test, its not a slam dunk but I would imagine "dad" and I use that term loosely, would have to almost prove to the judge why it is in the child's best interest NOT to be adopted by your stb hubby. But don't do anything that would make you look bad in the eyes of the court, having son call fiance dad, having fiance on school paperwork as dad, drs paperwork etc.

MsLiss96
by on May. 2, 2013 at 10:09 AM

Yes, I like to refer to him as the sperm donor.  He has done everything to make himself look bad without me making a scene (which I wouldn't any way).  My fiance hasn't and won't take over the role as father until the paperwork is done and everything is legal.  We don't want to do anything from jeopardizing this.  I'm all about doing things the right way :).  Especially since this is the best thing to happen for my son and me.

MsLiss96
by on May. 2, 2013 at 10:10 AM

Thank you :D

conniejo75
by Bronze Member on May. 2, 2013 at 10:15 AM
From my experience, you have to attempt to serve BD. If no known address, then you have to show attempt was made... last known address, posting notice in newspapers, etc. If BD doesn't come forward and prove he is Dad and that he wants to be a part of son's life (child support too). Then it's done. I believe e a DNA test would have to be done to prove he is the father before he could even fight it.
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on May. 2, 2013 at 10:40 AM
If the bio dad will sign his rights away but every state has different laws good luck
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on May. 2, 2013 at 10:41 AM
If the bio dad will sign his rights away but every state has different laws good luck
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