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UGH!

Posted by on May. 2, 2013 at 7:04 PM
  • 9 Replies

so early i text my dd father and ask if he could get her some stuff or just give me the money and ill get it myself. the whole time I'm talking to him I'm crying because i hate asking for his help but right now i need it. i told him how i feel about it and everything, then he says "I'm here for you if you need me. i told you if you need my help i will help you."


well where the f was he the 9 months i was pregnant and the past 4 months i been caring for my dd by myself. last time i asked him for money he flipped out on me saying i should have "took care of my mistake" and i wouldn't need his help!


UGH!! i hate him so much!! why the f was i ever with him!

by on May. 2, 2013 at 7:04 PM
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Replies (1-9):
dawncs
by on May. 2, 2013 at 7:15 PM

You need to file for child support then along with child custody. File for sole legal and physical custody. Child support would amount to about 17% of his income before taxes. Trust me, it is well worth it because if he will not be there for her physically, he can be there for her financially. I recommend it being garnished from his paychecks. Do not ever feel guilty over this. You gave him his chance to be responsible for the first four months of her life, and he did nothing.

Dawn


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (http://www.cafemom.com/group/118648)

Lillysmommy0113
by on May. 2, 2013 at 7:19 PM
1 mom liked this

i filed for child support. im waiting for the state to go over the paper work and get call/a letter about it.

Quoting dawncs:

You need to file for child support then along with child custody. File for sole legal and physical custody. Child support would amount to about 17% of his income before taxes. Trust me, it is well worth it because if he will not be there for her physically, he can be there for her financially. I recommend it being garnished from his paychecks. Do not ever feel guilty over this. You gave him his chance to be responsible for the first four months of her life, and he did nothing.


steviechick
by Gold Member on May. 3, 2013 at 10:46 AM

Men - they want to do the bamba but refuse to be responsible afterwards.  My ex is the very same way. 

Good for you for going after what is right for your child.

breebree04
by on May. 3, 2013 at 2:42 PM

My xh wanted our kids and was there for them while we were married but since the divorce I have gotten responses like that from him too. Sometimes if I ask for extra help (which I rarely ever do)  he will get mad and tell me thats what the child support is for (he pays $80 a week for 2 kids) and then other times he will say why didnt you call me? Im their dad, I can do it. Ugh, so aggervating!

Lillysmommy0113
by on May. 3, 2013 at 2:47 PM
I dont undersatand guys sometimes. Last night i asked him if he wants to help get a new carseat and he like flipped out saying he doesnt know if he will have a job then but he wants to help. I told him if you dont want to help pay for YOUR child dont get mad at me for not letting you see her.

Quoting breebree04:

My xh wanted our kids and was there for them while we were married but since the divorce I have gotten responses like that from him too. Sometimes if I ask for extra help (which I rarely ever do)  he will get mad and tell me thats what the child support is for (he pays $80 a week for 2 kids) and then other times he will say why didnt you call me? Im their dad, I can do it. Ugh, so aggervating!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
breebree04
by on May. 3, 2013 at 2:55 PM

 wow, hopefully your child support will come through soon!


Quoting Lillysmommy0113:

I dont undersatand guys sometimes. Last night i asked him if he wants to help get a new carseat and he like flipped out saying he doesnt know if he will have a job then but he wants to help. I told him if you dont want to help pay for YOUR child dont get mad at me for not letting you see her.

Quoting breebree04:

My xh wanted our kids and was there for them while we were married but since the divorce I have gotten responses like that from him too. Sometimes if I ask for extra help (which I rarely ever do)  he will get mad and tell me thats what the child support is for (he pays $80 a week for 2 kids) and then other times he will say why didnt you call me? Im their dad, I can do it. Ugh, so aggervating!


 

Lillysmommy0113
by on May. 3, 2013 at 3:20 PM
Me too! Im tired of asking and not know if ill get yelled at or if hell be nice about it.

Quoting breebree04:

 wow, hopefully your child support will come through soon!




Quoting Lillysmommy0113:

I dont undersatand guys sometimes. Last night i asked him if he wants to help get a new carseat and he like flipped out saying he doesnt know if he will have a job then but he wants to help. I told him if you dont want to help pay for YOUR child dont get mad at me for not letting you see her.


Quoting breebree04:


My xh wanted our kids and was there for them while we were married but since the divorce I have gotten responses like that from him too. Sometimes if I ask for extra help (which I rarely ever do)  he will get mad and tell me thats what the child support is for (he pays $80 a week for 2 kids) and then other times he will say why didnt you call me? Im their dad, I can do it. Ugh, so aggervating!




 

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
dawncs
by on May. 3, 2013 at 3:27 PM

 When he starts yelling at him, tell him to stop having sex if he is not going to be a responsible father to both babies he created. Responsiblity is not just physically but financial wise. Suggest to him to get a vasectomy if he does not want to be a responsible adult and father in society to both kids.

Quoting Lillysmommy0113:

Me too! Im tired of asking and not know if ill get yelled at or if hell be nice about it.

Quoting breebree04:

 wow, hopefully your child support will come through soon!

Quoting Lillysmommy0113:

I dont undersatand guys sometimes. Last night i asked him if he wants to help get a new carseat and he like flipped out saying he doesnt know if he will have a job then but he wants to help. I told him if you dont want to help pay for YOUR child dont get mad at me for not letting you see her.


Quoting breebree04:


My xh wanted our kids and was there for them while we were married but since the divorce I have gotten responses like that from him too. Sometimes if I ask for extra help (which I rarely ever do)  he will get mad and tell me thats what the child support is for (he pays $80 a week for 2 kids) and then other times he will say why didnt you call me? Im their dad, I can do it. Ugh, so aggervating!


 

Dawn


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (http://www.cafemom.com/group/118648)

Lillysmommy0113
by on May. 3, 2013 at 3:35 PM
I have just a lot ruder. We got in to about 10 fights over him not wanting to help me but he will give the other girl whatever she asks for. He only does that because she goes all crazy lady and throws, hits or calls the cops on him. She once punch herself and called the cops on him, she always went to jail over it. She was just trying to get $20! So now he just gives her whatever she ask for. I try to be nice to him till he gets rude.

Quoting dawncs:

 When he starts yelling at him, tell him to stop having sex if he is not going to be a responsible father to both babies he created. Responsiblity is not just physically but financial wise. Suggest to him to get a vasectomy if he does not want to be a responsible adult and father in society to both kids.


Quoting Lillysmommy0113:

Me too! Im tired of asking and not know if ill get yelled at or if hell be nice about it.


Quoting breebree04:


 wow, hopefully your child support will come through soon!


Quoting Lillysmommy0113:

I dont undersatand guys sometimes. Last night i asked him if he wants to help get a new carseat and he like flipped out saying he doesnt know if he will have a job then but he wants to help. I told him if you dont want to help pay for YOUR child dont get mad at me for not letting you see her.



Quoting breebree04:



My xh wanted our kids and was there for them while we were married but since the divorce I have gotten responses like that from him too. Sometimes if I ask for extra help (which I rarely ever do)  he will get mad and tell me thats what the child support is for (he pays $80 a week for 2 kids) and then other times he will say why didnt you call me? Im their dad, I can do it. Ugh, so aggervating!



 

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