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Single momma issues

Posted by on May. 7, 2013 at 1:59 PM
  • 10 Replies
Hey yall, Im currently a single mom to 2 year old and my signifant other and i are expecting our little one in september, Recently my daughter has been calling my signifant other "daddy" and today when her real dad called she keeps on wanting to talk to him. Her dad and i arent together and I have full custody to where i can say whether or not he can talk to her but im just afraid that if he starts coming around then its going to confuse her. He hasnt been in her life for 2 years and well im not sure what to do. UUUGHH Please help
by on May. 7, 2013 at 1:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
easinpc
by Gold Member on May. 7, 2013 at 2:13 PM

I do not have any advice to offer but here's a bump for you.  Good luck!

maddiemommy2009
by on May. 7, 2013 at 2:38 PM
If it were me and he really wants to be a part of her life now I would allow him to see her it all depends on the type off person he is now .
Is he a danger to her ?
Do u think he would fight for shared custody. ?
Mybe he realize he was wrong and wants to be a better dad.

And are u planning on keeping ur child real birth father a secret or will u tell her when she gets older.
I mean u have to think about all this maybe she'll blame u from keeping her from her father when her brothet or sister knows there really dad . I think its something to really consider cause u might think its best for her now and may look like the bad guy in the future . Its up to you . You know the type of person her dad is
shauna_ailytj
by on May. 7, 2013 at 3:05 PM
she knows about her real dad... and yes he is a danger and no he wont fight. im just hesitant about letting him to close
s.osborne
by on May. 7, 2013 at 4:00 PM

 Tell him to fuck off

amonkeymom
by Gold Member on May. 8, 2013 at 1:56 PM

Congrats on baby #2!

I'm not sure what you might want to do about her bio dad coming around, but you might need to think about having the court order changed so that he can or can't have visitation.

krisnkids
by Silver Member on May. 8, 2013 at 2:05 PM

Why is he a danger to her?

Robsessed98
by on May. 8, 2013 at 2:14 PM
1 mom liked this
Your SO may be a father figure, but he's not her father. She has every right to know who her bio father is and imo you're totally wrong if you deny her the opportunity. Even if he doesn't stick around, at least she will know when she gets older that you didn't deprive her of the chance and resent you for it. Sometimes we think we are protecting our kids when in reality we are just being selfish.
brittanyb91
by on May. 8, 2013 at 2:28 PM

i have dealt with similar sitiuation. My two yr olds bio father started wanting to bea part of her life after i had got married (im now divorced) and my two yr old had called my ex husband daddy because he was the only one she knew as a father figure. My ex didnt like the idea of her bio father bein in her life and wouldnt allow it, but i have recently started allowing her bio father be in her life and it has turned out to be a good choice. He use to be a danger to her because of drug use but he has now straightened up his life and is doin well with her. i didnt want my daughter to grow up and blame me for not knowing him. Just set rules with him till u know that he can be trusted with your daughter and see how it works then just go from there, thats what i done. Good luck and i hope it works out for the best

steviechick
by Gold Member on May. 8, 2013 at 2:40 PM

If he is truly a danger to her you have every right to cut things off with the ex.  He has to prove he's even worthy to be around his own child.  I believe that all fathers should have the right to be with their kids IF they are mentally stable.  You don't owe anything to him if he has mental issues.  The safety and well being of your child are important.  If anything correct her for calling your SO 'Daddy' he's not married to you, so I would tell her to call him by his name.   Until you have the ring on your finger he shouldn't be a father figure to your daughter.

shauna_ailytj
by on May. 9, 2013 at 9:10 PM
thanks everyone and he is a danger simply because of abuseive behaviour and he is bipolar and he doesnt take his meds. im really worried that he will hurt her and i dont mind if he sees her it just has to be with either me or my parents with my daughter. i dont trust his family, except his brother. His brother seems to be the only one with his head on straight.
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