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I'm stuck. Need advice!

Posted by on May. 19, 2013 at 2:10 AM
  • 10 Replies
My baby dad and i are separating. He's only been back in my daughter's life for 9mths but they have a great bond now and i feel stuck. I'm not a US citizen but have lived here for 7yrs. My daughter's 3 and until 9mths ago I had raised her alone. It was hard and i can't do it again. Working as a Waitress, working nights, relying on 24hr daycare's which are so hard to find, absence of family, no time for socializing and if there was i was too exhusted. He said he will hire a lawyer to stop me taking our daughter. I have no money for that. I don't want to take my daughter's dad out of her life but I'm lonely. I miss my family. Life as a single mom would be a world different with my family around. Here I'm depressed. I want to go back to school but that wont happen if i stay here. Any thoughts or similar stories or advice for this?
by on May. 19, 2013 at 2:10 AM
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Replies (1-10):
myamommy
by on May. 19, 2013 at 2:47 AM
1 mom liked this
I say do whats best for you and your baby and go home. I wouldnt care how he felt, he wasnt worried about how u felt up until 9 months ago. Your gonna hear alot of kids need their fathers. That is true but who is to say he wont wander off again. It may be selfish to some but i think you should be able to be happy and comfortable and feel love and have reliable help. I wouldnt sit around and wait for him to decide to take another 2 yr break from being a dad because you get no breaks from being mom.
myamommy
by on May. 19, 2013 at 2:55 AM
I meant to ask does he really have lawyer money? Do you think he would really fight it even if you just left?




Quoting myamommy:

I say do whats best for you and your baby and go home. I wouldnt care how he felt, he wasnt worried about how u felt up until 9 months ago. Your gonna hear alot of kids need their fathers. That is true but who is to say he wont wander off again. It may be selfish to some but i think you should be able to be happy and comfortable and feel love and have reliable help. I wouldnt sit around and wait for him to decide to take another 2 yr break from being a dad because you get no breaks from being mom.

4myboyz252
by on May. 19, 2013 at 3:32 AM

Lawyer money is gonna put him in a hole. Just the retainer alone can range from 1500 on up. I would look into your area for free legal advice. Never feel stuck there is always a solution just need to ask questions to see what your rights are in your situation.

Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on May. 19, 2013 at 8:41 AM
Is he listed on the birth certificate? If not, pack your stuff and leave ASAP without letting him know.
virginiamama71
by Carrie on May. 19, 2013 at 9:53 AM
Is any of your family in the US? If he does not have money for a lawyer he may just be saying that as a threat.
mommy_2_be_2010
by Bronze Member on May. 19, 2013 at 9:56 AM
2 moms liked this
Bump go home and take your kid he can't do much if he can't find you
LifeCafe42
by Nora on May. 19, 2013 at 11:52 AM

contact free legal advice best to be one step ahead 

sid1083
by Silver Member on May. 19, 2013 at 11:58 AM
Where are you currently at (location)?

Not trying to discourage you at all, but if you are the relocating parent there's a good chance you'll now be responsible for travel costs on visitation.
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portland333
by on May. 19, 2013 at 1:40 PM
Thank you for your reply. You're right he didn't care enough about her to be there from day one. 9mths doesn't make up for 2 1/2 years of absence. I'm not sure if he would get a lawyer but he is on the birth certificate and i did get a consult with a lawyer a few years back. I was told that taking her out of the country would be a charge of "International kidnapping"!!! That blew me away. They said if i won and was allowed to relocate i would have to cover the travel costs for him to have his visitation with her. People think if i just go he wouldn't bother doing anything but im not so sure. Hes mad over the fact he has to pay child support. He hates me having any control. Its such a mess.
Bellmont
by Member on May. 19, 2013 at 2:44 PM

I don't know what to say but ,Call Legal Aid in your area. See what legal rights are.

 

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