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Here's my story. Okay I told you guys how I wanted to leave my sons father etc. And I did. I packed up moved out, but didn't file for custody because we had made a verbal agreement with no disagreements. Silly me! So my sons father takes my son and refuses to give him back to me. I call the police they tell me there's nothing they can do. I freak out. At the end of that day he texts me to come get my son, I go to the location and we get into an argument becuase he won't give him to me! He pushes me I grab him, he gets a scratch, calls the police, I soend a week in jail for domestic violence! Get out of jail to a restraining order and bim telling me I can't see my son until the court orders him too and he's filing for full cusfodh and wants xhild support etc. He put my son on formula and started him on baby food and is leaving him with people I don't even know. I feel like I'm going crazy and I haven't stopped crying. Is there any advice you mamas have for me. I'm going back in forth to court for custody and trying to get these charges dropped I'm so stressed I can't eat or sleep. Help?!?!
by on May. 25, 2013 at 4:34 AM
Replies (21-30):
Shygirl951
by Member on May. 26, 2013 at 3:22 AM
I never thought it would come to anything close to this idk why guess I was blinded by love, but never again!


Quoting Robsessed98:

That's why I push so hard for making it all legal immediately. Sorry you learned the hard way. All you can do is gather all negative proof against him you can find, make sure you are living the perfect lifestyle including having only clean, quality people around you and going to court. Courts still generally lean towards giving physical custody to moms unless there is good cause and him denying you access will reflect badly on him., but there is no guarantee. I hope it all works out for you.

elzingah36
by on May. 26, 2013 at 3:39 AM
Have you already tried this? Is that why it wouldn't work?

Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways




Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child





Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.








Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.









Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc












Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.






What state, are you married, is he on the bc?









Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Shygirl951
by Member on May. 26, 2013 at 3:42 AM
Yup they said he has as much right as me, they do nothing without a court order


Quoting elzingah36:

Have you already tried this? Is that why it wouldn't work?



Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways






Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child







Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.










Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.











Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc














Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.







What state, are you married, is he on the bc?











elzingah36
by on May. 26, 2013 at 3:48 AM
Sounds to me the police aren't doing their job. Honey I'm so sorry you and your DS are going through this. Are you aware of where your son is when he's dropped off at these strangers?
Are they strangers to your DS or to yourself as well? Sorry for all the questions. I went through something very similar,it was 1992 but nevertheless,I can relate to the horror your going through.


Quoting Shygirl951:

Yup they said he has as much right as me, they do nothing without a court order




Quoting elzingah36:

Have you already tried this? Is that why it wouldn't work?





Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways








Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child









Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.












Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.













Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc
















Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.








What state, are you married, is he on the bc?












Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Shygirl951
by Member on May. 26, 2013 at 3:52 AM
I Don't know anything. Communication at this point is non exiStent


Quoting elzingah36:

Sounds to me the police aren't doing their job. Honey I'm so sorry you and your DS are going through this. Are you aware of where your son is when he's dropped off at these strangers?

Are they strangers to your DS or to yourself as well? Sorry for all the questions. I went through something very similar,it was 1992 but nevertheless,I can relate to the horror your going through.




Quoting Shygirl951:

Yup they said he has as much right as me, they do nothing without a court order






Quoting elzingah36:

Have you already tried this? Is that why it wouldn't work?







Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways










Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child











Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.














Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.















Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc


















Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.









What state, are you married, is he on the bc?














LifeCafe42
by Nora on May. 26, 2013 at 9:50 AM
Document everything lawyer up this isn't going to be an easy ride and the one he's really hurting is your child
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
kitty8199
by on May. 26, 2013 at 10:07 AM
It should. If they say they can't, say i have custody. He doesn't even have visitation.
This is the code. Go get my kid. I don't NEED a court order. He doesn't have rights. All for a supervisor. Call the courthouse and explain. See what they tell you. Keep on. I'd also ask your lawyer. Maybe sue the department.
Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways



Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child



Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.







Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.







Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc











Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.






What state, are you married, is he on the bc?












Posted on CafeMom Mobile
conniejo75
by Bronze Member on May. 26, 2013 at 10:14 AM
"Unless paternity is established"... because father is already on BC he has been given paternity... married or not. In CA they generally do joint custody unless extreme cases require sole custody.


Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways




Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child





Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.








Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.









Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc












Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.






What state, are you married, is he on the bc?










Posted on CafeMom Mobile
kitty8199
by on May. 26, 2013 at 10:17 AM
You don't need a court order. This is what proves it. Provide then with the code, then ask why they still won't when the LAW says you have full custody and specifically states without going to court

Quoting Shygirl951:

Yup they said he has as much right as me, they do nothing without a court order




Quoting elzingah36:

Have you already tried this? Is that why it wouldn't work?





Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways








Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child









Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.












Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.













Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc
















Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.








What state, are you married, is he on the bc?












Posted on CafeMom Mobile
kitty8199
by on May. 26, 2013 at 10:23 AM
That part was for child support. The code states mom has full custody at birth if unmarried. Married they have assumed joint.

Quoting conniejo75:

"Unless paternity is established"... because father is already on BC he has been given paternity... married or not. In CA they generally do joint custody unless extreme cases require sole custody.




Quoting Shygirl951:

Nope but thanks anyways






Quoting kitty8199:

Maybe this code section if stated will make the cops get your child







Quoting Shygirl951:

Thank you.










Quoting kitty8199:

Unwed Mothers Under California Family Code Section 7610, an unwed mother automatically gains custody of her child upon birth. No legal action is required to assert her custodial rights. She is solely responsible for providing for her child and making decisions regarding his living arrangements, health care and education. Barring any court order, the mother determines what, if any contact, the father has with the child. However, unless paternity is established, the mother has no right to child support from the father in this situation.











Quoting Shygirl951:

I'm in CA and we're not married but he is on the bc














Quoting kitty8199:

One thing I've learned its cops don't know shit about custody laws. Sometimes you have to force them by providing the law to them.







What state, are you married, is he on the bc?











Posted on CafeMom Mobile
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