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Posted by on Jun. 2, 2013 at 10:06 AM
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Hi, I am 17 weeks pregnant and have just joined this group. My story is complicated but not any more adverse than those I have read about. Essentially, my husband and I are separated, have been for the past 9months, we met up again in February to try and work things out, I became pregnant. Unfortunately he had been seeing someone while we were separated and was not completely honest about the extent of their relationship. On Easter weekend, he found out and told me she was pregnant. We were a week apart. Supposedly she had an abortion, of this I am uncertain.  As I was hopeful I could make this marriage work, I have now begun the grieving and healing processes to letting that go. I will be doing this without him as I know I deserve happiness and he is not capable of this. There are many things for me to consider. I have an appointment with an attorney in August, baby due in November. I have always wanted children and wanted this prior to our separation, he was not able to wrap his mind around this, so in many ways, I feel tremendously blessed. I have huge anxieties regarding finances and time management on how to make all this work. I appreciate any feedback, suggestions you may have on this topic but would also like to say, thank you. This can not be easy, and many of you have lived through tragedies, heartache and pain to arrive were you are today. Here is to the strength of a mother.

by on Jun. 2, 2013 at 10:06 AM
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by Bronze Member on Jun. 2, 2013 at 2:31 PM

Congratulations on your pregnancy.  I'm so very sorry for the breakup of your marriage.

by on Jun. 2, 2013 at 7:07 PM

You will survive, focus on the life you are bringing into this world. It was what I did. Motherhood is strength.

Sounds much like what happened to me, only we were never married, which was probably a blessing, as legally it made things so much easier. Emotionally and mentally, it was a long tough road. 

Only thing I will say is you never know what can happen. My daughter's dad wanted NOTHING to do with having a baby. We didn't speak during the last 6 months of the pregnancy. Then he started coming around but told me he felt no connection to the baby. Then he got a girlfriend that wanted to play mommy with my child and suddenly he was wanting to battle me for custody. His girlfriend became this nightmare puppet master that turned him into a nightmare for me.

Anyway, flash forward and here we are and he just played my heart strings again, then left me to go back to the nightmare woman. My mistake! Somedays I really wish (for my sake) that he had just moved to another city and disappeared like he always talks about doing. I am happy for my daughter who gets to see her dad, and have that for whatever it remains as, over time, for her it is good but I sure wish he was gone from my life.

I am waiting for him to get the nightmare pregnant. Ugh... 

by Platinum Member on Jun. 3, 2013 at 1:34 PM

Welcome to the group.  While it sucks that your marriage is breaking you, you're right that you do deserve happiness!  I'm glad you're taking steps to bring that happiness to light.

You are strong too, and you and your child will do just fine.

by on Jun. 4, 2013 at 8:51 AM
Welcome to the group!
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by on Jun. 4, 2013 at 11:36 AM
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Hi and welcome to the group.  Breaking up is hard to do when you are expecting a child in the process.  Just remember this child was made from love.   Don't be too hard on yourself.  Your marriage didn't work out.   Stay focused and happy that you are getting ready to have a child.  Something positive in your life. 

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