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So Monday my Dh told me he was done working on our marriage. But he wanted ds and I to stay with him in our apartment until our lease was up (6 months). I packed up ds and I on Tuesday and we went to stay with my mom for a few days. I thought time apart would be good for all of us. I am pretty sure this few days away is going to be permanent. Why go back to a home where I am not wanted?

So today Dh (um soon to be xdh?) is coming to pick up our son to see him for a few hours. I am a wreck. He will be here (hopefully) really soon. I feel like I could hurl. I can handle 3 hours away from ds. But I am not ready to see Dh. Last week we were talking more babies. This totally came as a shock to me. And of course he and I will be talking tonight about our situation after ds goes to bed, so that makes the nerves worse. I just want this all to be over with. Thankfully I am staying with family.

God this sucks.

Well he showed up an hour and a half late. Refused to wait until our son went to bed to talk about anything and ended up storming out with even saying goodbye to his son. And he left because I told him it is not okay to be an hour and a half late. It irritates me but it is unfair to our son.

Oh. And he cleared out our bank account and changed the passwords so I don't have access anymore. Seeing as I have been a SAHM for over 2 years I am a bit screwed.
by on Jun. 13, 2013 at 5:46 PM
Replies (11-13):
by Gold Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 8:10 PM


by on Jun. 14, 2013 at 8:18 PM

I know this is a difficult time for you. Helf of the bank account is yours. If you can right now, I recommend filing for emergency food stamps, TANF, child care, WIC, and Medicaid from your state. It will force a child support hearing as a result of you filing for these benefits. In some states, this can be done online, but in some cases, it has to be done in person. Talk to your parents and tell them of the current situation to see if they can loan you enough money to get an attorney for an ex parte order based on him cutting off the bank accounts along with you being a sahm.


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (

by on Jun. 14, 2013 at 10:47 PM

Whether you can recoup any of the money that was in the bank accounts is a matter for the courts to decide.  Right now, that money is community property meaning you could just as easily have cleaned out the accounts as he did.  Since you did not contribute the money in the account (being a SAHM), not all courts will give you any portion of the money other than ordering child support and possibly spousal support.  At this point, I wouldn't count on seeing any of that money, but would suggest contacting the local child support agency and asking them to pursue your STBX for a temporary child support order.  Since you are a SAHM, realize that many states now will impute your income (assign at least a full time minimum wage income to you) when determining the amount of support to be ordered.  Again if you are splitting for good, you may want to start looking for employment as a means of supporting yourself and your child.

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