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ready to be done

Posted by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 5:42 PM
  • 22 Replies
I'm so ready to be done with my sons father. The past 15 months have been so up and down. One minute he's nice and the next he's bein an ass. Can't wait to be able to file for his rights to be terminated.
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 5:42 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mom2priceboys
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 6:20 PM

 why would his rights be terminated? do you have a custody and visitation agreement? Has he used it? Has he been paying any support? Did he sign paternity on the birth certificate? Is he on the birth certificate?

DavidsMommy6.12
by Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 6:27 PM
I will be filing to terminate his rights once me and my so get married next year. We have no agreement for visitation or support but he hasn't seen my son in 6 mos and hasn't sent money in almost 6 mos. He doesn't ask about him hardly ever.


Quoting mom2priceboys:

 why would his rights be terminated? do you have a custody and visitation agreement? Has he used it? Has he been paying any support? Did he sign paternity on the birth certificate? Is he on the birth certificate?


Robsessed98
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 8:23 PM
If he's been around this whole time how do you think his rights will get terminated? How is he with your child? You need to remember it's about your child and his father, not you and the father.
DavidsMommy6.12
by Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 8:28 PM
No biodad hasn't been around. My sos been involved since he was 2 mos old. its better if my son can be adopted by my so. My so is my childs father in everyway but dna


Quoting Robsessed98:

If he's been around this whole time how do you think his rights will get terminated? How is he with your child? You need to remember it's about your child and his father, not you and the father.

woodstock525
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 9:37 PM
1 mom liked this

Have you investigated this thoroughly in your state?  I hate to tell you this, but it is not as easy to get parental rights terminated as you are thinking.  Before you will be able to terminate his rights, he will have to agree to that.  And, if he doesn't, since there isn't COd visitation for him to have not complied with, it is quite likely that he could file for and be able to start visiting his child. Since there isn't a child support order in place, there is no reason for the courts to hold against him that he hasn't given you any money for the child either.  And, the courts will take a dim view if you have encouraged your child to call another person daddy with the plan to exclude the bioparent from the child's life.

In addition, many courts will not allow parental rights to be terminated for a stepparent adoption until the parents have been married for a certain length of time (typically at least a year). 

conniejo75
by Bronze Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 9:39 PM
This.


Quoting woodstock525:

Have you investigated this thoroughly in your state?  I hate to tell you this, but it is not as easy to get parental rights terminated as you are thinking.  Before you will be able to terminate his rights, he will have to agree to that.  And, if he doesn't, since there isn't COd visitation for him to have not complied with, it is quite likely that he could file for and be able to start visiting his child. Since there isn't a child support order in place, there is no reason for the courts to hold against him that he hasn't given you any money for the child either.  And, the courts will take a dim view if you have encouraged your child to call another person daddy with the plan to exclude the bioparent from the child's life.

In addition, many courts will not allow parental rights to be terminated for a stepparent adoption until the parents have been married for a certain length of time (typically at least a year). 


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DavidsMommy6.12
by Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 9:53 PM
I have reaseched it. Maybe I don't quiet understand it because I was under the impression if the courts felt it was in the best intrest of the kid they could have the father sign off. Such as what they did with someone I know. Also I don't encourage my son to call my so daddy. In fact I call him buddy and use his name. I'm pretty sure him denying the child and tellinf me he's not going to give me any money would help and show he don't give a damn.


Quoting woodstock525:

Have you investigated this thoroughly in your state?  I hate to tell you this, but it is not as easy to get parental rights terminated as you are thinking.  Before you will be able to terminate his rights, he will have to agree to that.  And, if he doesn't, since there isn't COd visitation for him to have not complied with, it is quite likely that he could file for and be able to start visiting his child. Since there isn't a child support order in place, there is no reason for the courts to hold against him that he hasn't given you any money for the child either.  And, the courts will take a dim view if you have encouraged your child to call another person daddy with the plan to exclude the bioparent from the child's life.

In addition, many courts will not allow parental rights to be terminated for a stepparent adoption until the parents have been married for a certain length of time (typically at least a year). 


DavidsMommy6.12
by Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 9:53 PM
I have reaseched it. Maybe I don't quiet understand it because I was under the impression if the courts felt it was in the best intrest of the kid they could have the father sign off. Such as what they did with someone I know. Also I don't encourage my son to call my so daddy. In fact I call him buddy and use his name. I'm pretty sure him denying the child and tellinf me he's not going to give me any money would help and show he don't give a damn.


Quoting woodstock525:

Have you investigated this thoroughly in your state?  I hate to tell you this, but it is not as easy to get parental rights terminated as you are thinking.  Before you will be able to terminate his rights, he will have to agree to that.  And, if he doesn't, since there isn't COd visitation for him to have not complied with, it is quite likely that he could file for and be able to start visiting his child. Since there isn't a child support order in place, there is no reason for the courts to hold against him that he hasn't given you any money for the child either.  And, the courts will take a dim view if you have encouraged your child to call another person daddy with the plan to exclude the bioparent from the child's life.

In addition, many courts will not allow parental rights to be terminated for a stepparent adoption until the parents have been married for a certain length of time (typically at least a year). 


woodstock525
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:13 AM
1 mom liked this

In your case, you have no court order for support, the non-custodial parent doesn't have to give you a dime.  And, in fact, without a court order they shouldn't.  So, whether he has refused to give you any money or not, since there isn't a CO in place, the courts probably won't consider this part of the argument.  Now, if you got a CO for CS and he didn't pay, then you would have more evidence.

No parent has to acknowledge a child until paternity is proven via a DNA test.  There are many absent parents who once the DNA comes back positive, then are willing to move forward and establish a relationship with their child and pay child support.  Once you establish paternity and have a CO for visitation that he fails to follow through on in addition to not paying child support, then you can prove that the ncp has abandoned the child.

Some people try to circumvent this process by just claiming they don't know who the father is and then having the stepparent do an adoption.  The courts definitely frown on this as you are supposed to name any potential fathers before an adoption would take place.  If you lie and do not contact him, then the adoption could be voided in the future due to fraud. 

I'm not trying to discourage you, you just need to realize that this is not likely to be as easy of a process as you might think.  The prevailing view in most courts nowadays is that the best interest of the child is for the child to have a relationship with both bioparents.  It's great if they have a stepparent, but a stepparent does not trump the rights of a bioparent.

SAMI_JO
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:16 AM

 I negotiated no visitation for no child support. Never one word in 15 years.

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