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How do you live in this world without a support system?

Posted by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 3:04 PM
  • 5 Replies

Its pretty weird how when you are really in need of help noone seems to answer their phone. The only source of help that I did have were my parents. They both have health issues and they are raising 3 mentally challenged children. My sisters whom they have had since they were babies. Well these girls are just a little bit older than my kids so they enjoy going over to my parents house to spend time with them. Since the summer started I have been trying to work more hours so I put my kids in summer camp close to where my parents live which is about 45 minutes away from me.

Today my youngest daughter got into it with one of the girls and they were hard down fighting. While I was on the phone with my mom I heard nothing but screams and loud noises and then all of a sudden my daughter in the background saying "I dont F'n care"! My mom said "wow I didnt know your daughter acts like this"! So I told her to do what she felt that she needed to do as her grandmother until I got there. When I got there they blamed everything on my daughter and my mom said that she finally sees what I have been telling her all along about my daughter. She said that she really needs some help and that there is no way that I would ever be able to work and have someone keep her because of the way she acts. She said that she can't have my daughter around acting in this way. I understood. At that moment I felt that my only little bit of support was gone. The other girl that my daughter was fighting with was in the room laughing with one of her friends and I felt like a huge joke. I was upset at the fact that they all seemed to be against my daughter. I told my sister that my daughter isn't the only one to blame.

So now I am pulling my daughter out of the camp because she is with my younger sisters all day and they seem to be so against her. I dont want to take my oldest daughter out of the camp because she shouldn't have to be punished for what her sister did. But I am now needing somewhere to put my youngest while I work. I just got a call from her counselor and told her about what happened and she said that my daughter maybe depressed. 

by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 3:04 PM
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Replies (1-5):
virginiamama71
by Carrie on Jun. 22, 2013 at 11:15 PM

BUMP!

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jun. 23, 2013 at 10:52 AM

hugs mama i'm sorry i wish i had some advice or help.  I have very little and it's stressfull but somehow it always gets figured out

 
CafeMom Tickers

flprincessmom
by Bronze Member on Jun. 23, 2013 at 7:55 PM

 I do not have a support system in the same state as me & me 2 kids.....but we do manage....it helps that my oldest is 10 years older than his sister, so he is able to do alot more than if they were closer in age.....both my 'rents are dead and there is no involvement from either sperm donors family's...or my family for that matter.....the only support I have is from my sisters (minus 1) and my dad's sister (aunt)....but it is long distance.....so, I have learned the only one you can count on is YOU, and if you can't do it, it don't get done.....

ame4c
by Silver Member on Jun. 23, 2013 at 8:55 PM

Often when you don't have a support system, you need to create one.  I know it sounds easier said than done, really it does.  But you can look for support groups, mommy clubs, and even church are all areas to search for support.  It really isn't easy but get out there and look for places to make friends in similar situations.  They may not offer to help with your kids, but having a good friend to vent too every now and then can be the biggest help.

This group is also a good place to chat it up.

steviechick
by Gold Member on Jun. 27, 2013 at 3:54 PM

My mom has been my saving grace.  She sent me the money to help pay a retainer fee.  Without that I would have been without a decent lawyer.  And, thank goodness for my mom, I had to literally fight my ex for every dime of my settlement.

Check out DivorceCare groups and see if you can hook up with them.  I know they are a great source of info, friends and a place to get counseling if you need it. 

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