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What to do? What to do? Give me whatcha got!!

Posted by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 8:06 PM
  • 11 Replies

Hi !! I"m Laura.  I'm new to this blog.  For the last day and a halfI have read ya'lls post.  I also hopefully was helpful to a few women.  Anywho, like all of you,  I have a story too.   I am a 34yr old single mom to be in a month, who just got seriously financially screwed by the now xbf.  "x" is the key word.   So I'll accept the responsibilties for being dumb I guess and not seeing the lieing SOB's truthful side,  that he is liar and a cheat who uses and manipualates people, me being one of them..  Yea, I figure this out after almost  a year.  So anyway, the xbf has two "boybratts" .  Seriously they were bratts.  Seriously I'm not bitter, just very disappointed in the whole situation.  K, well that is background story.  Now, down to business...   I need ya'lls imput...  The piece lied and left me with about a thousand dollars worth of bills that have came into discovery over the last two weeks.  Last weekend he and his mom came and got about half their things.  I asked them, because I'm trying to be civil and kill them with kindness, prob a mistake,  if they wanted to take the boys bikes?  They said no we'll get them next weekend, which would be now.   Haven't heard a peep from anyone.  So today I text the xbf and asked him if he was going to come out this weekend to get some more of their stuff.  That was five hrs ago.  Haven't heard nothing yet.  So my question is would you all attempt one more contact text or not?   Also,  the moral complex I have is to sell the bratboys bikes or not?  I actually paid for half of the cost for those around christmas.   I really need the money to pay the util or water bill. Again, that is two of the bills he left me with that was not paid.  * I gave him half the money to pay the bills, he didn't pay them.*  What would you all do? Sell the bikes or not??   and or give him  another courtesy text or not.  btw I'm prego with his little girl now.   He is a deadbeat obviously.  To do those things, lie, cheat and put a prego's womans welfare at serious risk of homelessness.....

by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 8:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mlb456
by Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 8:17 PM
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Umm id deff ask someone who could give you some legal advice. the last thing youd want is him/them taking you to court and you having to pay them back. Oh and i wouldnt just rely on the moms here alot of them think they know what their talkin about and some might but YOU dont know. plus ever state has different laws. just my thought good luck
pregosngmom
by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 8:25 PM

bicycles not motorcyles..

krisnkids
by Gold Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 8:41 PM
1 mom liked this

DO NOT sell or give away any of his or his childrens items. If you do he can take you to court and have you pay to replace the items. Find out what your local laws are for storing/disposing of tenants items and follow them to the tee. The boys  bikes were gifts, you don't have a right to them. 

pregosngmom
by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 9:04 PM

Yea, that's my moral complex.  I've been fighting myself on it for about 2wks now.  I know it's not their fault and they are kids.  I figured karma would be a bitch on that whole deal..  I haven't sold or gotten rid of anything, it's a nice idea though.

dawncs
by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 11:04 PM
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 Karma does come back to bite people at some point in their lives in regards to past decisions of theirs. He has probably used people in the past and more than you or his family. Users only have a short life, and it is even shorter in this digital age because word would get out eventually about him. Also, if he brought a girlfriend to court with one of his hearings, she would get a preview of what is to come. He would anger a judge at some point with his attitude which can carry over into the next judge if he requests a new one. Do not ever tell this to his wife or girlfriend because she will never believe you at all. I do recommend filing for child support when the baby is born because it can help with expenses.

Quoting pregosngmom:

Yea, that's my moral complex.  I've been fighting myself on it for about 2wks now.  I know it's not their fault and they are kids.  I figured karma would be a bitch on that whole deal..  I haven't sold or gotten rid of anything, it's a nice idea though.

Dawn


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (http://www.cafemom.com/group/118648)

woodstock525
by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 11:20 PM
1 mom liked this

I would stop texting him.  If you txt him and his mom at all, I would text that you need him to pay the util and water bills and that you already gave him half the money to pay them and the companies are saying he didn't pay them. 

pregosngmom
by on Jun. 29, 2013 at 4:43 AM

 


Quoting dawncs:

 Karma does come back to bite people at some point in their lives in regards to past decisions of theirs. He has probably used people in the past and more than you or his family. Users only have a short life, and it is even shorter in this digital age because word would get out eventually about him. Also, if he brought a girlfriend to court with one of his hearings, she would get a preview of what is to come. He would anger a judge at some point with his attitude which can carry over into the next judge if he requests a new one. Do not ever tell this to his wife or girlfriend because she will never believe you at all. I do recommend filing for child support when the baby is born because it can help with expenses.

Quoting pregosngmom:

Yea, that's my moral complex.  I've been fighting myself on it for about 2wks now.  I know it's not their fault and they are kids.  I figured karma would be a bitch on that whole deal..  I haven't sold or gotten rid of anything, it's a nice idea though.

 

 

My only dilema with filing child support is that I know how he is with his kids that are already on the face of the planet, not to mention the oldest that is 9 is gonna be a columbine kid or something.  This kid is far from "normal" .  I really just wanna be able to pick up and move on after I get things settled up over the 8 months.  This way my little girl won't have a "dad" that is in an out of her life at his disposal and I won't have to worry about the oldest being around her.  Eventhough child support has its perks, the down fall would be I would have to stick around this area and make my daughter avail. to him.  I'd rather cut my losses and move on.  I didn't mention I've done this whole preg. by myself.  NO ONe has went to the doc with me one time in eight months.  My fam and friends live five hours away.  I feel that if he really cared about the unborn he would have never had lied about the bills, I mean bold faced lied about the bills, not to mention he just put his kids and himself on the street.  Good thing his mom was there for him.  So basically, he caused his own homelessness for everyone,  fortunaltly my fam stepped in a little on my behalf an the landlord is working with me.  He doesn't care.  So to me that gives me validity to do what is best for my daughter and I and go asap and make a good life for us.   I plan on moving back to my hometown once I'm able to work again and either ride this lease out til feb.  or they pardon my lease.  All of which would be a god send.  I'm not picky.   P. s. thank you for your support.


 

pregosngmom
by on Jun. 29, 2013 at 4:49 AM

 

 

Quoting woodstock525:

I would stop texting him.  If you txt him and his mom at all, I would text that you need him to pay the util and water bills and that you already gave him half the money to pay them and the companies are saying he didn't pay them. 

 

 They know what's up.  Can't bleed juice out of a turnip.  I haven't text him til yest. afternoon.  I just want his sh!@ outta here.  I've came to terms with eventhough the bills are in his name too, if i want a roof over my head util and water then I better get er' done myself.  lol.    oh, no I never did hear anything back from him. ANd i didnt text him anymore than the orig. text sent asking if he's gonna come by an get some more of their stuff.     p.s.  Thank  you for your support.

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jun. 29, 2013 at 9:48 AM
1 mom liked this

Welcome!  I'm glad you found us!  If you paid for half sell the bikes and give him half the money.

Mariah-1987
by on Jun. 29, 2013 at 5:17 PM
Send him one more text that says he needs to pay whatever bills. And keep the messages so you can show them to a judge when you sue his ass.
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