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Seriously, how on earth do you do it?!! I need to know!!!

Posted by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 6:22 AM
  • 37 Replies

I don't know where or how to start but I guess I should start from when I took out my Jadelle contraceptive last December. Prior to that I had had an aggressive sexual drive. When I wanted sex which was almost all the time or when I didn't have much occupying my mind, it was with a very strong desire, like "I have to have it now!" kind of  desire.

However, the contraceptive caused me a hormonal imbalance and I had to take  it out. My libido dipped, thankfully but then I noticed my desires had become different. At first, it was subtle, the urge was still strong but in a quiet way. I don't know if I'm communicating it effectively but, it was still strong but not loud. Plus, it began to feel more feminine.

Masturbation was no longer satisfying, I began to crave emotional sex. To cut the long story short, during ovulation or just before my period, I get insanely horny in the "quiet manner" I described above and when I don't indulge , I get really cranky and irritable. I've observed this for 3 months now.

I read here of some people who haven't heard sex in months and years, how do you cope? Don't you have hormone induced body responses  etc?

Sorry, it's long.

by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 6:22 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Mocking.Jay
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:13 AM
3 moms liked this
Lol no. I don't understand why fulfilling sexual desires is so important. It's not like it hinders my ability to live. I've been so busy this year that I'm going on a year without sex. It's okay though, I'd rather be educated than focus on sex hahaha.
kidlover2
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:35 AM
The first few months after my husband left me was extremely difficult.... But the idea of "hooking up" and catching diseases was even scarier. It just got easier with time not to crave it anymore. Lucky for me, I met someone a little over a year ago and of course had sex with him within the week. *blushing* We're married now so it's all good.
morethanamemory
by Member on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:12 AM
2 moms liked this
You just stay busy and ignore it. I would rather ignore it then get a bad rep and a STD from sleeping around. (I live in a small rural area where everyone is in everyone's business)

Of course it hasn't been a problem the past few months with my wonderful boyfriend in my life after being single a yr and a half.
LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:59 AM
I'm the opposite I have no drive.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Mamavelt
by Bronze Member on Jun. 30, 2013 at 10:16 AM
1 mom liked this
I had a similarly active drive. If there is one thing I really miss about my x, it is that we had really regular sex. After we broke up I felt like I was going to explode. In some ways I was fearful of what purely lust driven choices I might make. Ironically a guy friend and I discussed this and he impressed on me the difference between a need and a want. Sex really as nice as it is...is a want. A need is staying focused and making good choices for the kids and myself. Celibacy has allowed me clarity in my decision making process and has given me the time and space i needed to recover from divorce without external distractions, for which I am grateful. I will honestly tell you though that I haven't had sex in a really long time and somedays I wonder if that part of my life is over...and that scares me.
alexis_06
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 12:37 AM

 i havent sex im a looooong time!! it sucks! LOL cuz from what i can remeber, i used to love it!!   my problem is, is i havent found the right man :(

labrax
by Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:06 AM

Lol. I've tried to stay away from even 'self help' but I noticed the crankiness. I'm trying to learn how to handle it.

Every woman's body is different and I have guys hitting on me most days, so it's common sense overriding hormonal responses not to find myself on my back especially during ovulation  lol. I have always had a healthy sex life and now I have no significant other, I'm keeping myself to myself. I'm just trying to learn from other moms how they coped with the impulse. I have been very busy for the past two years but still noticed the crankiness.  Is there a way to make it stop or to make it barely noticeable?

labrax
by Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:10 AM



Quoting kidlover2:

The first few months after my husband left me was extremely difficult.... But the idea of "hooking up" and catching diseases was even scarier. It just got easier with time not to crave it anymore. Lucky for me, I met someone a little over a year ago and of course had sex with him within the week. *blushing* We're married now so it's all good.


Lucky you!

labrax
by Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:11 AM



Quoting alexis_06:

 i havent sex im a looooong time!! it sucks! LOL cuz from what i can remeber, i used to love it!!   my problem is, is i havent found the right man :(


Lol. I like the 'from what I remember, I used to love it'.  He'll find you.

labrax
by Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:15 AM



Quoting Mocking.Jay:

Lol no. I don't understand why fulfilling sexual desires is so important. It's not like it hinders my ability to live. I've been so busy this year that I'm going on a year without sex. It's okay though, I'd rather be educated than focus on sex hahaha.


When you say you've had no sex, do you mean, not even masturbation?

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