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Go or stay?? Need opinions please :)

Posted by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 9:34 AM
  • 14 Replies
I hope this post is to too confusing but I need help deciding what to do. Like many of you moms, my life is pretty stressful, work full time, school (almost) full time, kids, and all the rest of the craziness that comes with being single. So anyway, I have the opportunity to take a last minute trip to Florida (leaving tomorrow night) with a friend. Most would think, "Yay, a relaxing beach vacation!!!!" But here's my dilemma...

I share physical custody with my ex and I HATE when the kids are with him. He was physically abusive to me and he verbally abuses the kids. This weeks custody is weird bc of the holiday but basically he has wed-Friday. I have sat- sun and he has mon-tues. he's about to go out of town and has been asking to keep them sat and sun bc he's loosing his weekend when he goes on vaca. For me to go to Florida I would have to give it to him which means a VERY long time wo my kids (he's had them since Friday and would only see them wed for a few hours).

I feel very selfish leaving them there to go on a vacation without them. Plus financially it may not be the smartest move. I could do it but it would deplete my savings which I use to pay daycare. We would he staying with my sister so the cost would just be gas and food. Plus I'm about to take ex back to court to try to change custody bc he moved an hour away without any notice and has the kids a lot.

So, what would you do in my situation?? Would you go to Florida, or stay here so you could have the kids for 2 days????
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 9:34 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 9:43 AM
1 mom liked this
If you can't afford it, don't go. No need to blow $ you can't afford to spend.
steviechick
by Gold Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 10:54 AM

You can always save up money and go to FL next year.  I would in your situation.

easinpc
by Gold Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 11:10 AM

In that situation I would pass on going this year.

Bero2007
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 11:21 AM

I wouldn't go if it would deplete your savings. you never know when something will come up and you will need that money

SAMI_JO
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 11:48 AM

 Stay, I don't trust being that far away from my kid. Even if I knew he was well cared for and happy. I would not go. But that is just me.

woodstock525
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 12:54 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm reading between the lines here that you really need a break.  It sounds like this would be a good opportunity and wouldn't really cost you a bundle.  As long as you feel the kids would be okay with their dad (which for the most part it sounds like they would), then I would go for it.  If you stay, what would you do with the kids for the two days that they couldn't have done at their dad's?  Plus, you will probably be much more relaxed having had the opportunity to let your hair down for a change in a childfree environment.

I hate to say this, but I used to enjoy the times my kids went with their dad...it was my adult and child-free time to regroup and re-energize.

kristinas8
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 1:08 PM
Is there someone you trust that wouldn't mind popping in on the kids and letting you know how it's going while your gone? Sounds like you really need the break. That's not being selfish.
LauraMH
by Bronze Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 2:26 PM
2 moms liked this

Thanks ladies. I decided not to go :(  I do need a break but I don't feel right about not taking the kids with me. I talked to my mom and we are going to take a "mini vacation" with the kids next month to someplace fairly close to home that won't cost to much $$$

It will let me have a break from work and school but allow me to have fun with the kids too. It's a win win :)

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jul. 2, 2013 at 10:18 PM


Quoting Bero2007:

I wouldn't go if it would deplete your savings. you never know when something will come up and you will need that money

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jul. 2, 2013 at 11:35 PM
Staycation?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
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