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Which is better court-ordered child support or voluntary child support

Posted by on Jul. 13, 2013 at 6:10 PM
  • 24 Replies

Everyone says it's best to get court ordered papers on these absent fathers,

however what if you make a little more than the absent parent. Is it even worth going to court? Will the court take into consideration your expenses verses his? I do receive child support voluntary but should I go to the court since we have a verbal contract? Has anyone experienced this?

by on Jul. 13, 2013 at 6:10 PM
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by on Jul. 13, 2013 at 6:42 PM

It is better to get a court order.  I know it "cost" more in the long run with fees to file the papers and maybe even attorney fees but in the long run it will be worth it cuz if your ex is "delinquent" than the courts get involved and your ex will have to pay back child support with his tax money or he can get his license taken away and the courts will have it ordered to garnish his wages automatically so you don't have to worry about it.  It does not matter how much you make (well it does a little) BUT the courts look at how many OVERNIGHTS you have versus your ex.  IF you have your kid ALL the time, than the courts will make your ex pay.  Verbal contracts are very bad.  It becomes a "he said/she said" thing.  IF you wanted to do a contract w/o courts involvement at least get it down on paper that you both sign, but even that wont stand up in court if your ex doesnt pay.  Legal papers need to be filed.

by on Jul. 14, 2013 at 12:02 AM
Bd and I did everything voluntarily until his now-wife inserted herself. I wasn't worried about him for the most part not being good for it, but should she have gotten a power of attorney to handle his finances and interfered with his transfer of money, I'd have been up shit creek with no recourse. I wasn't going to play their little game so when I filed for custody, I took away his ability to work with me willingly. He can thank her for that.
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by on Jul. 14, 2013 at 7:10 AM
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 I once worried about this to and whether or not I should cancel the support order since I make more than my ex. But I won't. I have no remourse for him and our mutual friends he lives with cause they bitch about money and tried to tell him to get me to lower the support so they can afford more food(ex told me this.) But ex knows this is his punishment and won't convince me to lower it. However it soon will be lowered. I will be earning a higher pay rate soon at my new job and I'll have to report it to court. But I'm not worried one bit. He'll still have to pay even if it's just $75 a month, it takes TWO people to make a baby and BOTH parents are responsible for the child's needs.

by Group Admin on Jul. 14, 2013 at 8:13 AM
I think it depends on the relationship you two have. My ex and I never went to court for visitation or support. We get along really well and unless an issue comes up I have no intention of going to court.
by on Jul. 14, 2013 at 8:31 AM

I have a court order and despite my ex's many pleas I am NOT dropping it. Ever. The only time he pays is when it's taken out of his check, once that happens..he quits his job. So my advice, is court order only.

by Bronze Member on Jul. 14, 2013 at 8:59 AM

Every couple is different but in my case COURT ORDER ONLY!!! My ex talks a good game and makes a lot of statements about what he "will" do but when push comes to shove the only time I get anything is when his wages are garnished...Great provider and dad when we were married DOUCHE since I divorced him...the courts use a formula based on the income of both parents, who provides the health insurance , what your expenses for your child is ie day care, after school, extra curricular costs and which parent keeps the child the majority of time (primary care giver)

by on Jul. 14, 2013 at 10:56 AM

court ordered that way it can be inforced

by on Jul. 15, 2013 at 7:06 AM
Court order is better because with a verbal contract people can change their mind about things or just decide to stop paying when they feel like it.
by on Jul. 15, 2013 at 7:09 AM
Court ordered....this way you get it no matter what. A verbal agreement is not solid enough for me.
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by on Jul. 15, 2013 at 7:15 AM

I didn't get child support until it was court ordered, even now he doesn't pay like he's supposed to.  He pays once every 3 or so months. 

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