Seriously, I have GOT to get out of here!
With the money I have saved and other things I have in line, all I need is the JOB and I'm outta here! I really really really need it!
I am so tired of this place, I am tired of being undermined and I am tired of my life being gossip fodder. My mom just blabs shit to everyone and always has. When I was a teenager, before she retired, people from her office would call here for her and when I would answer they'd start talking to me about my life like they knew me. And she wonders why I won't tell her anything about what my plans are. She asks me "how you gonna move out and work and homeschool?" I have ALL OF THAT worked out already but I sure as hell won't tell her the hows and whys because I don't want to deal with it.
Yesterday, like and IDIOT I slipped up and told her I was taking the kids out to lunch (this was at like 9 am, and I don't tell the kids we are leaving for lunch so early because then they get dressed and start to circle and get impatient). She goes into the computer room to see my older two almost getting into a fist fight and tells them that I am taking them to lunch to break up the fight. Like really? That's the ONLY thing you could think of? You could have just, ya know, told them to STOP. But since they were fighting, they are both punished and no one went to lunch. I really wanted to go because my dad is a disgusting human being and was cleaning fish in the kitchen stinking up the entire house -- which is another reason I need to move. My dad is a hateful son of a bitch and my kids hate him. They will tell you this themselves.
So she KNOWS they are punished. 10 yo got her phone taken away, the xbox is put up, all things video games are missing now. So what does she do this morning? She was supposed to take 10 yo to church but ended up not going to she tells them she's taking them to a movie KNOWING FULL WELL they are punished. I have seriously fucking had it. So I just heard her come down the hall (we live on opposite sides of a huge house, it would be easy for her to just stay out of the situation) and tell them "oh your momma says you're punished so now you can't go" making me out to be the bad guy again because SHE decided to undermine me.
I just need the job.. it's all I need... I have everything else worked out..... just need the job.............. I pay for ALL the food in this house. They know I have to grocery shop for the kids so every time I leave they give me a list for what they want. I have no issues doing that, because I live in their house, but that should be saving them enough money to pay the cable bill, right? NO. I just had to pay that, and I've also been paying her dental bill. She let me put my dental work on her account which is awesome, yes, thank you for that, but now that I am paying it, she has not put a dime on her portion of it for months.. AND i just paid her cell bill. AGAIN. I tried to work with her saying "let me pay a set amount per month plus what I owe on the dental bill" and I've tried "give me one utility bill to pay every month like the water bill or the gas bill" and she's all "I feel bad taking that money from you cause you need it" yet it's okay for her to ask me to pay her bills randomly? It just doesn't make any sense. I don't get her logic. I have no issues with paying for living here, but make it the same amount every month, not just whatever bill you can't pay at the time. Some months she practically bleeds me dry (of what I have in my checking, she doesn't know about my savings).
I need some job fairy dust!