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Ok cupid date ..thoughts please?

Posted by on Aug. 5, 2013 at 3:49 PM
  • 19 Replies

So I closed POF acct and opened OKCupid but it is essentially the same BS but seems to have slightly higher quality men than POF.

I met this guy last night since I was kidless. He is 42, childless and only married a very short time to a woman he met in South America. He worked in SA for several years at his old job and the marriage did not work out, she was too young  but she moved to the US and they are still friends. They married and divorced in SA but as of right now she is living with him in his spare bedroom. She had her own apt, lost her job, broke her lease, moved in with him and got a job and says she is moving out in Nov as soon as her friend's lease is up so they can move out together. He said any romantic relationship is long over but he does not want her homeless so for now they are roommates. It is a little odd and he said if its a dealbreaker he will ask her to move out but since this is a temp arrangement and she has agreed to move out in Nov he hopes its not a big deal. i have only been out one with him so honestly I do not have any opinions on this.  He did tell me before we met his ex lives with him and he really hoped thats not a dealbreaker .

On another note...he is educated, tall and good looking, nice body/build and educated. However he is soft spoken. Not quite feminine but a little softer spoken than what I am used too. He made it clear he want to see me again, we can take it slow and see what develops and told me he thinks I am super beautiful and the best looking woman in our age range that he has met in a long time.

Super courteous. He walked me to my car, and  while we were in the restaraunt i went to the bathroom and when I came back he stood up for me.

He is overall a really nice guy. What do you think?

 

by on Aug. 5, 2013 at 3:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
amandacr1026
by on Aug. 5, 2013 at 4:20 PM
2 moms liked this

Proceed with cauion? Hang out.. have fun.. but don't put too much into it until she really does move out. I think thats how I would play that.

OCALAMOMOFTWINS
by on Aug. 5, 2013 at 4:56 PM
2 moms liked this

The relationship is new, no need to make a commitment now. Go slowly, get to know each other, you would do that if she was not in the picture anyway. If things feel like they are not right, you can pull out.

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Aug. 6, 2013 at 9:26 AM
1 mom liked this
You aren't getting married but there are a lot of red flags proceed with caution!!!
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Robsessed98
by on Aug. 6, 2013 at 9:38 AM
2 moms liked this
He sounds nice enough, but the ex is a red flag. If you like him, keep getting to know him, but move slowly. If you're suspicious of their relationship mention that you'd like to meet her and see how he reacts. That will tell you how honest he's being.
owl0210
by Bronze Member on Aug. 6, 2013 at 9:39 AM
I would not even entertain the thought of dating a man who still lived with his ex-wife.
colins_mom
by Bronze Member on Aug. 6, 2013 at 9:42 AM
it sounds a lot like what I was told, guy was married. a lot of the guys on ok cupid are on pof too and are creeps
meglovesie11
by on Aug. 6, 2013 at 12:45 PM
Same here.

If I barely know a man I can't give him the benefit of the doubt on situations like this.


Quoting owl0210:

I would not even entertain the thought of dating a man who still lived with his ex-wife.

Oliviasmom72
by Silver Member on Aug. 6, 2013 at 1:02 PM

The ex moved out for several years. They are divorced. She is back now because of sudden job loss and she lost her apt. She hasnt lived with him the whole time if that was the case I would not feel right about it.

easinpc
by Gold Member on Aug. 6, 2013 at 1:35 PM

 I like this idea!


Quoting Robsessed98:

He sounds nice enough, but the ex is a red flag. If you like him, keep getting to know him, but move slowly. If you're suspicious of their relationship mention that you'd like to meet her and see how he reacts. That will tell you how honest he's being.


 

mamalena137
by Bronze Member on Aug. 6, 2013 at 2:04 PM

I agree with all the ladies, take it slow. You've been on one date. There's no telling if this will go beyond friendship. Just be cautious, when exes live together, there might be some unresolved feelings or issues. Like Robsessed98 says, ask to meet her.

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