Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

birthday parties

Posted by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 12:57 AM
  • 16 Replies

Do any of you plan combined parties?  Meaning both sides of families doing one party for the kids rather than having Mom's party and Dad's party?  I decided this past year that I just can't emotionally do combined parties because I spend the entire party trying to keep food down (because he makes me sick!)  

The main decision basically stemmed from the fact that Step Mom asked if she could help 5 months before actualy birthday and I said I'd get back to her.  Then, about 4 weeks later, I get an email saying when and where the party would happen.  It's happening on a weekend that I have to work all week, so I decided to just throw my own.  

Now, dad is saying that it would be SOO confusing for my son-to throw 2 different parties.  What do you think?

by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 12:57 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
LauraMH
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 9:36 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't have any kind of interaction with my ex except email and when I see him to exchange the kids. We do everything separately. I don't think it will confuse your son. Do what you want. You aren't together. 

Pooge
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:07 AM
1 mom liked this
Yeah he got 2 times the fun...
IBNeaters
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 11:51 AM

This is my goal!  I was trying to be nice and make sure they were included in everything for the past couple of years, but it all got really crazy.  I try to be the bigger person and then they just throw things in my face all the time!  There was a school function the last week of school and they spent the ENTIRE day, right behind my head, whispering sweet nothings in each other's ears and basically throwing themselves at each other!  I wanted to turn around and tell her that he used to say the same things to me and ask him if he could come up with some new material!!!  Oh, and this woman who he started dating 1 week after our divorce was final, who had never had children, thinks she can give me parenting advice!!!  She doesn't have kids!!!  I decided after the event that we were just going to live seperate lives and THAT was better for my son than spending the afternoon in tension.  


Quoting LauraMH:

I don't have any kind of interaction with my ex except email and when I see him to exchange the kids. We do everything separately. I don't think it will confuse your son. Do what you want. You aren't together. 



LauraMH
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 11:56 AM

Yeah, I hate seeing ex at school functions, dr appointments etc... Fortunately for me he doesn't normally go to these things! Our situation is a little difference bc there was DV with us. So i don't even feel safe around him. He still tries to see me, call me, and other stuff I don't want to get into. But there is nothing wrong with e-mail communication. You don't even need to speak to the new girlfriend!

You can do this mama!


Quoting IBNeaters:

This is my goal!  I was trying to be nice and make sure they were included in everything for the past couple of years, but it all got really crazy.  I try to be the bigger person and then they just throw things in my face all the time!  There was a school function the last week of school and they spent the ENTIRE day, right behind my head, whispering sweet nothings in each other's ears and basically throwing themselves at each other!  I wanted to turn around and tell her that he used to say the same things to me and ask him if he could come up with some new material!!!  Oh, and this woman who he started dating 1 week after our divorce was final, who had never had children, thinks she can give me parenting advice!!!  She doesn't have kids!!!  I decided after the event that we were just going to live seperate lives and THAT was better for my son than spending the afternoon in tension.  


Quoting LauraMH:

I don't have any kind of interaction with my ex except email and when I see him to exchange the kids. We do everything separately. I don't think it will confuse your son. Do what you want. You aren't together. 





IBNeaters
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 12:06 PM

I think if it was just him I'd be more inclined to just let things fly, but his new wife is very pushy and thinks she knows everything.  She'll come to Dr appts and ask all these questions--just because she's a paremedic, she's the expert on my son's health!  I was even introduced as the other mom last year!  I used to think she was just over compensating for her lack of confidence, but lately, I just think she's a bitch.  I know that sounds bad, but when someone I hardly know continually asks me why I do things and how I should do it better, than that kind of gets under your skin!  I'm going to write back this morning and tell him what's what.  Thanks!!


Quoting LauraMH:

Yeah, I hate seeing ex at school functions, dr appointments etc... Fortunately for me he doesn't normally go to these things! Our situation is a little difference bc there was DV with us. So i don't even feel safe around him. He still tries to see me, call me, and other stuff I don't want to get into. But there is nothing wrong with e-mail communication. You don't even need to speak to the new girlfriend!

You can do this mama!


Quoting IBNeaters:

This is my goal!  I was trying to be nice and make sure they were included in everything for the past couple of years, but it all got really crazy.  I try to be the bigger person and then they just throw things in my face all the time!  There was a school function the last week of school and they spent the ENTIRE day, right behind my head, whispering sweet nothings in each other's ears and basically throwing themselves at each other!  I wanted to turn around and tell her that he used to say the same things to me and ask him if he could come up with some new material!!!  Oh, and this woman who he started dating 1 week after our divorce was final, who had never had children, thinks she can give me parenting advice!!!  She doesn't have kids!!!  I decided after the event that we were just going to live seperate lives and THAT was better for my son than spending the afternoon in tension.  


Quoting LauraMH:

I don't have any kind of interaction with my ex except email and when I see him to exchange the kids. We do everything separately. I don't think it will confuse your son. Do what you want. You aren't together. 







easinpc
by Gold Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 2:44 PM
1 mom liked this

Nope my sons dad and I both have separate parties for our son.

Robsessed98
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 6:17 PM

My ex and I combined the first 5 parties, because we got along great and it made sense (plus he paid lol).

IBNeaters
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 6:28 PM

Well, that doesn't work for me as he doesn't pay for ANYTHING!!  LOL  Plus, we really don't get along.  He's a narcissistic sociopathic liar and I really don't want to be around that. 


Quoting Robsessed98:

My ex and I combined the first 5 parties, because we got along great and it made sense (plus he paid lol).



rory10
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 6:45 PM

My mom told me separate parties is what always happened for me. This year DD will have a birthday weekend. Saturday SO's family, friends, and my dad and his sister (my parents are separated) and Sunday my side.

cjsmom1
by Platinum Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:29 PM

I throw the party and invite him, his family, and his friends (well the ones I like). It works well for us, but we ha ve a good relationship. Most people do everything seperate.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN