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A new Start

Posted by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 4:38 PM
  • 17 Replies

Hello. My name is Jamie. I am new to cafemom. I just left my husband of eight years. We have two children ages 2 & 5. My children and I have moved in with my mom. She is great. My husband has really put my heart threw the ringer. Four years of cheating on me off and on. I was so determined to work it out for the family, but he wouldn't stop cheating (among other normal marriage issues) I loved him but I do know the realtionship is unhealthy for me so I finally left. Lucklily I have my mom to lean on emotionally and financally ,and my sons do also. I do have a job although not full time as I was the primary caregiver of the children. My life has revolved around my family for 8 years.  I am having such a difficult time dealing with the roller coaster of emotions in this first week of seperation.  Letting go of the our home has been very difficult.  I feel displaced and alone. I have not  been Just Jamie since I had children. I do not have many friends but I do have a great family.

The biggest issue I am having right now is the rollercoaster of extream emotions. I am curious haw long till I begin to recover from this tragic event. My first step is cafemoms, getting support for women in similar situations.

Thanks for reading

by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 4:38 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MandaMom23
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 4:40 PM

 Hi, welcome to the group.  I wish you the best in your new start. 

diaperstodating
by Queen24Princes on Sep. 2, 2013 at 4:41 PM

Hi Jamie, welcome to the group!

welcome to cafemom

Christenrenee
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 5:03 PM
1 mom liked this

Welcome.  I would think in time you will settle into your new life.  Change is hard and takes time to adjust to it. 

Mamavelt
by Bronze Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 6:09 PM
How long it will take is up to you ... If you sit and mope it will take a long time, if you get on with the business of living you will recover more quickly. Working, socializing and taking care of your kids will help to get you focused on your new life. But I would guess, since you have been dealing w the cheating, you have been preparing for this possibility for some time. The reality can be shocking, you may feel like a refugee for a long time...but someday soon you will look around and you will have found your new life, and it will be a good thing.

Stay strong, mama!
jgregoryx3
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 6:39 PM

You are exactly right!

Misha1204
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 8:12 PM


Quoting diaperstodating:

Hi Jamie, welcome to the group!


welcome to cafemom

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MomAmy77
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 8:20 PM

Hugs to you . I'm not going to lie the emotions will be like a rollercoaster  . Maybe it's just me .   You just did the hardest part the next step among healing is finding yourself . I am still in this process and I can say it is past due and one that brings many interesting results . I have good days but then some bad . I think cause my ex still from this day tries to control me and is always there showing up or trying to be there . I wish you the best of luck . 

cjsmom1
by Group Admin on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:46 PM

Welcome! Adjusting to being a single mom takes time. Right now focus on the kids and taking care of yourself, it will hepl you not focus on your ex.

hayliedlr
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 11:00 PM
Welcome
Sj218
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 11:08 PM
The roller coaster doesn't go away, but it does slow down after a few months. After 6-8 months you starts to see little glimpses of your new normal. After a year the roller coaster is mostly stopped, except for occasional and unexpected surges.

I would really encourage you to find or join an in person support group. It made a world of difference for me.
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