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I've fallen into the single mom trap! What should I do now?

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I have fallen into the single mom trap, I am depressed and lonely, I am financially strapped and my house is a total mess. I am 25 and i have a 3yr old son, I have been divorced. His dad is active in his life, he takes him half the time, and my ex and I have an ok relationship. I am about to break up with my boyfriend and I think my son will be crushed. And I also had so many of my future plans with him (we were planning a wedding and looking for house :() I haven't broken up with him yet but he just doesn't have the time for me. How do i get my life back in order and not crush my son by pulling another father figure away from him.
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 6:11 PM
Replies (21-24):
by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 10:39 PM
1 mom liked this

Update: Thank You are for you support and straight forward words of wisdom. I have begun to see a great councilor, who will also work with me and my boyfriend if he chooses to come. I have chosen to give myself another 6 months to make my decision about moving in with him or not. I do not love being a single mother, don't get me wrong there are parts I love like not needing to compromise or coordinate plans with another adult. I still want another marriage and more children, and one day I will have it, I am just still not sure if my current boyfriend is the one.

by on Sep. 9, 2013 at 1:15 AM
by on Sep. 9, 2013 at 1:39 AM
1 mom liked this

I recommend not moving in with a man unless you're married. It's just a recipe for disaster. Commitment first, then sex. Don't set your child up for more disappointment, via bf deciding he doesn't want to make it permanent AFTER you've acted like it's permanent.

by on Sep. 9, 2013 at 12:28 PM

@ Colissa: I agree with you. I moved in with my ex, who used to say he had plans for us later on, but it never happend. he got me pregnant and then did not want to be responsible. Was the first time and a big mistake I made to mve in with a man, after a while being careful abt it.

I understand the "trap" idea b/c I felt this way for a while, like I was a dumb to have believed him. now I am stil depressed, scared alone, but trying to be strong and looking up for friends and support to move on my own. I know it will be hard but not impossible.  

Very true!! "Too many people get in the wrong relationship because they fall in love with the right things said by the wrong person. Words lie, so be deaf to what they say until their actions give you a reason to listen." #Rehab Time

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