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Court tomorrow

Posted by on Sep. 5, 2013 at 11:05 PM
  • 10 Replies

Ok ladies, I have court tomorrow for my contempt case against ex. Things have been pretty rough with him (as usual) but I think I am well prepared for tomorrow.

I am representing myself and am wondering what to expect. The contempt is for failure to pay CS, failure to pay medical, threatening to cancel med insurance for kids (if you know my DD, you know that is not an option), Moving without notice, refusing to give me kids on several occasions, and a few other really little things. He finally filed his answer just yesterday and along with it a motion to modify CS. He claims that neither of us should pay anything.

Anyway, I just want to know what to expet. Are we going to go infront of the judge alone? is the courtroom going to be filed with people waiting for their case to be heard? What if he is found in contempt? Do we just have one court date and get an answer or go back multiple times? 

Any info would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks :)

by on Sep. 5, 2013 at 11:05 PM
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Replies (1-10):
amandacr1026
by on Sep. 5, 2013 at 11:15 PM
1 mom liked this

Idk about any info.. I'm only just starting out CS hearings... but I do wish you luck.. sounds like he doesn't want much to do with the responsibilities, but I hope the judge will put him in his place for you

LauraMH
by Bronze Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 11:02 AM
Quoting amandacr1026:

Idk about any info.. I'm only just starting out CS hearings... but I do wish you luck.. sounds like he doesn't want much to do with the responsibilities, but I hope the judge will put him in his place for you



Thank you. We go today at 1:30 and I am so nervous. I haven't ever been given any reason to trust our court system here in the US so it really does make me nervous :(
saphiraka
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 11:05 AM
1 mom liked this

I dont have any answers but good luck momma!

kyandkaesmommy
by Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 11:31 AM
1 mom liked this
Good luck love message me with what happens!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
cjsmom1
by Gold Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 11:36 AM
1 mom liked this

Just go in there with all the facts and let the judge decide what to do. I know when I went for cs it was just me, my ex, and the judge.

MandaMom23
by Bronze Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 11:02 AM

 How did it go for you?

LauraMH
by Bronze Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 11:53 AM

So I just copied and pasted this from the domestic violence group I am in bc I truly have no mental energy to talk about what's going on. Thank you for asking though. I am supposed to go back to court in one month. 

Well, to put it bluntly, it didn't. He didn't even show up, his father came to represent him and was told that he couldn't. The judge called me up to him, told me that my paperwork was filled out incorrectly and that I could do one of two things: 1)Get an attorney and come back in 30 day or 2) Drop the charges. 

The paperwork was written by an attorney so I really don't know what was wrong with it. The only thing I got was that I had filed a contempt motion but I was asking for things to change as if it where a motion to modify. He wouldn't even listen to any of the contempt stuff I had brought in front of him (and it was on the paperwork). So nothing happened.

I have to either figure out how to get money, or do nothing. I did turn in the paperwork for the protective order after talking with my attorney (the one that is writing my papers but not representing me). She said she didn't realize his behavior was escalating the way it was and the first thing to do was to keep me safe.

I turned it in but had to leave to get the kids before a judge saw it so I don't know if it was granted or not and I won't know until I go try to pick up the papers Monday. I could have stayed though bc by the time I had gotten to daycare to pick up the kids, his dad had already taken them. It is his weekend but he's not supposed to get them until a certain time and just went and got them anyway. 

Long story short, I'm extremely stressed, worn out, starting to worry bc, until I actually talked it out yesterday, I didn't realize how much his behavior to control me was escalating. The courts won't help, I can't afford a lawyer, I make to much for legal aid and I have no family to help out. I feel stuck, at a loss, and as if nothing is ever going to change. 

Then I called him tonight to talk to the kids and tell him his dad can't get the kids whenever he wants and he was being all sweet again. For a while after I got off the phone I actually felt bad for going to file the RO. Then I called a friend who told me to stop falling for it, he's not nice, he's manipulating. But even if he is just manipulating I seem to always fall for it.

I am really worried about whether or not I am going to be granted the RO because he does thing so discretely and can always "explain" his way out of things. I almost feel to get any kind of assistance I have to wait for him to actually do something, not just make threats.

Sorry this is so long, but like I said, I'm frustrated :(


Quoting MandaMom23:

 How did it go for you?


 

MandaMom23
by Bronze Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 11:57 AM
1 mom liked this

 Hang in there.  Thank you for the update.  I will be keeping you in my thoughts, hoping for a positive outcome and that you stay safe.

Quoting LauraMH:

So I just copied and pasted this from the domestic violence group I am in bc I truly have no mental energy to talk about what's going on. Thank you for asking though. I am supposed to go back to court in one month. 

Well, to put it bluntly, it didn't. He didn't even show up, his father came to represent him and was told that he couldn't. The judge called me up to him, told me that my paperwork was filled out incorrectly and that I could do one of two things: 1)Get an attorney and come back in 30 day or 2) Drop the charges. 

The paperwork was written by an attorney so I really don't know what was wrong with it. The only thing I got was that I had filed a contempt motion but I was asking for things to change as if it where a motion to modify. He wouldn't even listen to any of the contempt stuff I had brought in front of him (and it was on the paperwork). So nothing happened.

I have to either figure out how to get money, or do nothing. I did turn in the paperwork for the protective order after talking with my attorney (the one that is writing my papers but not representing me). She said she didn't realize his behavior was escalating the way it was and the first thing to do was to keep me safe.

I turned it in but had to leave to get the kids before a judge saw it so I don't know if it was granted or not and I won't know until I go try to pick up the papers Monday. I could have stayed though bc by the time I had gotten to daycare to pick up the kids, his dad had already taken them. It is his weekend but he's not supposed to get them until a certain time and just went and got them anyway. 

Long story short, I'm extremely stressed, worn out, starting to worry bc, until I actually talked it out yesterday, I didn't realize how much his behavior to control me was escalating. The courts won't help, I can't afford a lawyer, I make to much for legal aid and I have no family to help out. I feel stuck, at a loss, and as if nothing is ever going to change. 

Then I called him tonight to talk to the kids and tell him his dad can't get the kids whenever he wants and he was being all sweet again. For a while after I got off the phone I actually felt bad for going to file the RO. Then I called a friend who told me to stop falling for it, he's not nice, he's manipulating. But even if he is just manipulating I seem to always fall for it.

I am really worried about whether or not I am going to be granted the RO because he does thing so discretely and can always "explain" his way out of things. I almost feel to get any kind of assistance I have to wait for him to actually do something, not just make threats.

Sorry this is so long, but like I said, I'm frustrated :(

 

Quoting MandaMom23:

 How did it go for you?

 

 

 

Jenner83
by Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 12:32 PM

Keep emotion out.  Only hard facts.  

DesertFlower197
by on Sep. 7, 2013 at 12:33 PM

In CA they won't hear CS and visitation issues on the same day.

Also in CA they don't do much for failure to pay CS except suspend licenses and garnish wages.  My ex owes tens of thousands and takes me back to court to attempt to modify CS at least twice a year.


Good luck!

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