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Abandoned and don't know what to do now...

Posted by on Sep. 15, 2013 at 2:19 PM
  • 5 Replies

Hi, here's my story:

met my husband when i was a freshman in high school, he was a sophomore. we stayed together til i turned 18 then separated for about 1 1/2 years. got into normal teenage trouble, did some growing up and got back together and got married in 2011. now we have a 2 year old son and i am also pregnant and due to give birth to our 2nd son literally any time now. our relationship has been great until this past year. he lost his job for something incredibly stupid then was on unemployment. We had a great home with 2 dogs and a cat. I've been a stay at home mom and he's supported me breastfeeding our first son for his first year and we had plans to do the same with our 2nd baby while he would work. We've been living a pretty simple but very happy and loving life. This past year, we needed help with money so his deadbeat dad moved in with us and nearly destroyed us, my husband hasn't been able to find a job and we were supposed to be moving 7 hours away so he could work ironwork with family but he got overwhelmed and scared and we ended up not going. We're used to small town life and it was a big city. So now our 30 days notice is up on wednesday, i'm living with my parents with my lil one and he's still in the house getting all his stuff figured out. a few days ago, he told me he doesn't love me the same anymore and that sucks because i still love him. I believe in God and marriage and family so this is a really hard situation for me to be in. I hate that my 2 sons are gonna have a broken family, no more stability, not raised by both parents under the same roof. I have no income. I'm still hoping that my husband is just overwhelmed or confused or something. No body knows not even my parents except for a mutual friend or mine and my husbands. I don't want to be depressed. I know I need to be strong for my 2 lil ones but not sure how. Any advice would be much appreciated.

by on Sep. 15, 2013 at 2:19 PM
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Replies (1-5):
by Platinum Member on Sep. 15, 2013 at 4:27 PM

im sorry

I'm hoping that he's going through some depression or something with the lack of work, etc and things will work out for you, but.... I know that it's not looking good at the moment.

Hang in there.  No matter what happens you'll be just fine and so will those little boys.  All they need is love and a happy mommy. 

by on Sep. 15, 2013 at 5:30 PM

It does sound like there have been pretty major stressors for your family the past two years...a marriage, 2 children, job loss, and loss of a home.  It does sound as though he may be suffering from depression and/or low self esteem.  See if you two can't perhaps get some free couples counseling...maybe through your paster or a counseling center that goes based on income.  I wouldn't throw in the towel just yet.

by on Sep. 16, 2013 at 5:57 PM

What a lot to deal with.  I'm sorry for what you are going through

by Group Admin on Sep. 16, 2013 at 6:01 PM
That's a lot of stress. Try couples counseling. Job loss is hard for everyone, especially a man who feels he's failing his family. Is getting a job an option for you? Maybe you working and him being a sahd will work.
by on Sep. 16, 2013 at 6:15 PM

When you feel like your entire world is crashing down you just gotta take it day by day.  Focus on your children, pray for strength and try to talk to him about counseling.

If he is not open to it, then you have to remember that you are a mother before you are anything else.  Those kids are your future and you are theirs.  

I'm super sorry, sweetie.

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