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I'm not allowed to be happy

Posted by on Sep. 20, 2013 at 10:45 AM
  • 13 Replies

So my ex and I were getting along fairly well with the whole figuring out which days he'd have our son thing since he's currently a waiter and his shifts are diff every week. That's changing as of sept 30th because he got a real adult type job with weekends off.  So I text him last night and asked him if we could start the weekends so he would have our son the weekend of the 19th.  He asks me why so I tell him because Ben is coming down to visit me and I want to  make sure it's a weekend I don't have Luke.  So that turns into him accusing me of seeing someone that I don't trust around my son. Um no I just don't have guys around my son when it's a new relationship. Unlike him who had his son around his gf literally the week we split and had her move in 2 weeks after they hooked up. 

So this turns into a huge fight and I'm like I don't see what the big deal is. You will be taking him every other weekend I just need to know which ones so I can make plans. SO then I get accused of trying to pawn off my son so I can whore around. Um no you get him every other weekend. How is asking which weekend he wants him pawning him off? 

Ever since I started seeing Ben he's just tried his best to make me look like the bad guy and a whore. 

The best part? Our marriage ended because he cheated on me then he tried to have a threesome the night after he cheated on me and handed me his ring and he tried to go down on some dude to see if he wanted to be with dudes instead.


But I'm a whore for having a boyfriend. 

Sure. 

by on Sep. 20, 2013 at 10:45 AM
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Replies (1-10):
steviechick
by Gold Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 10:58 AM

Your ex is a scumbag.  He needs to get over his anger and issues with you and your life.  Tell him he's a father first and his child should come before his personal needs with guys and gals.  I would actually question about your son being around your ex as he makes rather odd personal choices of who he wants to hang around.  Have you thought about changing visitation rights? 

orliesmom
by on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:01 AM

Wow he needs to grow up. Just hang in there. My ex was the same until I remarried a few years later Now he doesnt dare say anything because he knows that my hubby is a better father then he ever was and will be.

Bero2007
by Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:08 AM

thankfully his whoring around only lasted a couple days and then he regained his sanity. his gf is thankfully really good with our son. if she wasn't then I would have fought for full custody. he just can't handle that I'm finally moving on after 3 months. He thought I would just sit around and be single forever and he could use me as a babysitter whenever he wanted to

Quoting steviechick:

Your ex is a scumbag.  He needs to get over his anger and issues with you and your life.  Tell him he's a father first and his child should come before his personal needs with guys and gals.  I would actually question about your son being around your ex as he makes rather odd personal choices of who he wants to hang around.  Have you thought about changing visitation rights? 


easinpc
by Gold Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:23 AM
1 mom liked this

group hug

Jenn8604
by Silver Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:26 AM
HUGS!!! I have no clue what to say, besides what a douche and that's not something you don't already know.
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kfrog13
by Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:29 AM

Ugh, sorry to hear that! Your ex sounds like a douche like mine.  I caught him cheating online (nothing in person as far as I know) and he was constantly badgering me about whether there was someone else, cause you know his crappy treatment of me was not enough for me to walk :-/

Anyway, I think in the future you should just tell him you have plans and would like to know if that weekend would work for him.  It's none of his business who you see or what you do on your weekends off.

lnrmom
by Bronze Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:38 AM
1 mom liked this

Tell him to STFU and get over it. You making sure that you and Ben are in it for the long haul before introducing Luke is a good thing. Don't let him make you think otherwise.

Bero2007
by Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:40 AM

yeah I'm pretty much never going to tell him when Ben will be in town.  In the beginning he told me he wanted us to be friends and be able to talk about anything because he still cared about me. Now I see how it really is. I'm not going to talk to him about anything that doesn't relate to our son.  He's proven he can't handle me being happy and everything else in my life makes me happy

Quoting kfrog13:

Ugh, sorry to hear that! Your ex sounds like a douche like mine.  I caught him cheating online (nothing in person as far as I know) and he was constantly badgering me about whether there was someone else, cause you know his crappy treatment of me was not enough for me to walk :-/

Anyway, I think in the future you should just tell him you have plans and would like to know if that weekend would work for him.  It's none of his business who you see or what you do on your weekends off.


Bero2007
by Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 11:42 AM

I think he's the only person that doesn't grasp that I'm doing the right thing by not immersing Ben into Luke's life for awhile. I just love how he tries to turn it on me and claim that I'm doing it because I don't trust Ben. Uh I wouldn't be with him if I didn't trust him.

Quoting lnrmom:

Tell him to STFU and get over it. You making sure that you and Ben are in it for the long haul before introducing Luke is a good thing. Don't let him make you think otherwise.


justahousewife
by Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 12:55 PM

What you do with your free time is none of his business. When it comes to talking to him the subject should always be your child and refuse to talk about anything else. He's not your parent or your partner.

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