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opinion on child support enforcement

Posted by on Oct. 24, 2013 at 10:27 PM
  • 19 Replies
My ex pays his child support on time so far since August when our divorce was final.I have his information at the child support office.

He is pregnant, remarried, and also is known to tell lies. I havent had problems with payments yet, but with this new baby coming i expect and want to prepare for trouble! I used to want to have a heart but he walks all over us. Would you just have it enforced for your own security or continue being nice?
by on Oct. 24, 2013 at 10:27 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Oct. 24, 2013 at 10:56 PM

Initially my son's dad was mad at me for using Child Support Recovery but it's one of the best things I've done. We have ZERO drama about CS.  It's so nice not to have to worry about that.  There is plenty more to worry about. :-)

Nisha929
by Bronze Member on Oct. 25, 2013 at 7:06 AM
7 moms liked this

I really don't understand why so many women choose to be nice to a man that gives them his ass to kiss. You have a child(ren) to take care of and while there aren't any issues right now...they could occur once the new baby is born. Do what you have to do and stop worrying about being nice to him. Enforce it and if he doesn't like it...too bad.

My kids father doesn't speak to me because I took him to court for CS for our son (he was already paying for our daughter) but I don't care. He doesn't care about his kids and their well being so I don't care about him and his feelings. If he isn't going to be in their lives, he will be responsible in some way whether he likes it or not.

Luv.My.Kidz
by on Oct. 25, 2013 at 7:21 AM
2 moms liked this

Don't be nice... CS is for your kid... getting it documented on how much he has to pay weekly, bi-weekly or monthing is the BEST way and (IMO) the ONLY way to go. These women who do CS between them and the father tend to get hurt 8/10 times. They whine and cry because his new lil' g/f or wife is now controlling his money and won't give their baby any CS. 

My ex's pay support... when they want. Even with an order.

Your support won't go down or get raised typically unless there is a 30% change in income. 

cjsmom1
by Gold Member on Oct. 25, 2013 at 8:01 AM
If you're worried about not getting paid then get a cs order.
bluedeaj
by Deidre on Oct. 25, 2013 at 8:12 AM
1 mom liked this

Our child support agreement is written in with our divorce agreement.  In order for the amount to change, we'd need to go through the courts for that.  He's welcome to give me more if he wants lol but he can't give less unless he's up for being in trouble (which is not like him).  Did you not have to have it in writing (the CS) when you filed for divorce?

steviechick
by Gold Member on Oct. 25, 2013 at 9:54 AM
1 mom liked this

Ditto to what you said!

My ex is being a total scumbag about the cs he still owes his daughter.  He's gone to the lowest level and had his own wife (the tramp he left me for) file for separation just so that the garnishments I had in place are overruled.  Thing is he still has to pay our daughter the cs and pay me for the loans and embezzlement he agreed to in accordance to our settlement agreement or he goes to jail for 180 days. 

Our children are important to be taken care of responsilby by TWO parents.  Your ex fathered a child,so he is responsible for that child he fathered.  End of story.  At no time should any woman kiss the ass of their exes just so the exes will be nice to them and get away with being a father.  Take the ex to court if he doesn't comply.  It's the law and it's for the welfare of your own child.


Quoting Nisha929:

I really don't understand why so many women choose to be nice to a man that gives them his ass to kiss. You have a child(ren) to take care of and while there aren't any issues right now...they could occur once the new baby is born. Do what you have to do and stop worrying about being nice to him. Enforce it and if he doesn't like it...too bad.

My kids father doesn't speak to me because I took him to court for CS for our son (he was already paying for our daughter) but I don't care. He doesn't care about his kids and their well being so I don't care about him and his feelings. If he isn't going to be in their lives, he will be responsible in some way whether he likes it or not.


 

Mommy2Boys0900
by Unique Yanique on Oct. 25, 2013 at 10:28 AM
I would definitely have child support enforced.
My older son's father wasn't involved for the first few years of his life and I took him to court for child support. He paid his court ordered support, then when my son was 6 years old, he started being in his life. He sweet talked me and was coming around and doing things with my son, and with me. W hen he felt he had me wrapped around his finger he asked if I would drop the child support and let him pay child support on his own with out the court's enforcement. After laughing my ass off, to his face, I told him it was best we leave it the way it is. I'm so grateful I had enough sense to do what was in my son's best interest not his.
xyxyxx
by Member on Oct. 25, 2013 at 12:21 PM

I would definitely go through DCSE, but also remember that they are a state funded part of DSS and they are not always the most repsonsive, BUT if you have any concerns about him not paying in the future, you are better served to have it go through them because there are legal repercussions if he does not pay and the impetus is on him to prove why he did not pay. 

Jenn8604
by Silver Member on Oct. 25, 2013 at 12:25 PM
1 mom liked this
Id tell him "I'm glad you pay cs on time. That shows being a good father to X. Thank you for supporting your child. But I want to make sure this is all legal so no one feels cheated later I'm asking that cs be taken straight out of your paycheck. Like I said I don't want anyone to feel it wasn't done right. So everyone can be happy and remain civil for X's sake.
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faerie75
by Ruby Member on Oct. 25, 2013 at 12:46 PM

 personally id talk to him about it. id tell him that you will file if he plays any games.

my ex pays me on time without a court order, has for years but not all men will. my ex was an asshole at the beginning as well.

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