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Single Moms Single Moms

Stupid boy

Posted by on Nov. 27, 2013 at 9:23 AM
  • 19 Replies
So my babies dad has been emailing me thinking I was someone else that he met online a week ago. Don't ask me how he's that stupid I'm guessing he was using the last of his money to get drunk. He told me he has been single for years and he's a recovering alcoholic and hasn't drank in three years which is a lie because we broke up a month ago ;( he hasn't came around for my daughter and all he's worried about is getting another gf so he can get laid. I know because I checked his emails. I know it was wrong but I just needed that extra push so I could stop loving him and wondering what might have been. He also admitted to cheating on me a year ago. I know he will never change but it doesn't make any of this easier on me. I know it's not about the money but he quit his job so he didn't have to pay me any child support. Idk how I'm going to take care of her alone much less answer her questions when she's gets older about him. I mean what do I say you're dad chose beer over us or he cheated on mommy or mommy was so sad and to be happy she had to leave him? He took everything from us we have no car nothing all we have is our clothes now he gets to move back in with his parents that will provide for him. He's almost 30 I mean come on now.
by on Nov. 27, 2013 at 9:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
TXHulaMama
by Ashli on Nov. 27, 2013 at 9:53 AM

 I'm sorry you're having to deal with such a jerk. It sure seems there are a lot of them out there. Use this information to help you move past the relationship knowing you did the right thing.

When the time comes you'll know the right thing to tell your daughter. I plan to tell my daughter that her father knew he couldn't be the best daddy for her, which is what she deserved, so he did the best he could for her. Coming from a single parent family with a deadbeat dad myself, I know what she will be going through as well.

Does your state allow you to have the child support come directly from his paycheck? If so, then everytime he starts a new job, they will be notified and take it before he even gets it. That is the way my court orders are set up, but I'm not sure if it is always like that or just because my ex is in another state.

Makennasmommy89
by on Nov. 27, 2013 at 9:59 AM
Yes it works that way here too. But who knows how long it will be until he grows up and gets a job
cjsmom1
by Gold Member on Nov. 27, 2013 at 10:19 AM
1 mom liked this
I don't understand the "I'll just quit my job" mentality. I can't imagine moving back in with my parents over something so stupid. It's his kid too and his parents should be ashamed of how he's acting, not encouraging it.
Personally, I wouldn't tell my child any of the things you listed. I would just say he wasn't ready to be a dad and he left. I am a firm believer that kids will eventually see the truth so she will know one day what a jerk he is.
Makennasmommy89
by on Nov. 27, 2013 at 10:45 AM
His mom texted me and said not to get child support till he gets a job but I just can't raise her alone
Callaly
by Jessica on Nov. 27, 2013 at 12:57 PM
1 mom liked this

Its normal that you are feeling this way, its the first month that you are alone without him.. but to be honest he doesn't seem like a real catch and you need to really think "is this someone I want around my daughter" until he gets his shit right I hope your answer is "No" 

You need to get information, do research and figure out ways to get help, I am sure in your area there are means to support people in your situation, just until you get back on your feet and get the hang of single parenting. 

Its hard, but everything that happens to you happens for a reason.. because you are strong enough to get through it!  

Makennasmommy89
by on Nov. 27, 2013 at 2:08 PM
He will never change my daughter isn't the only baby he has :( he hasn't seen the other ones in yrs
sid1083
by Silver Member on Nov. 27, 2013 at 3:18 PM

Your daughter doesn't need to know he cheated on you. What good would that accomplish?

Makennasmommy89
by on Nov. 27, 2013 at 3:22 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm going to tell her the truth if she asks.
Blessed2585
by Member on Nov. 27, 2013 at 4:23 PM
1 mom liked this

I am sorry that you are in this situation. I can't even imagine what you must be going through. I know that is it stressful and that it is hard to have faith in a situations like this. I am sorry that you are being left alone to figure this out for yourself.

Do you have family near by that can help suport you in any way? Are you a member of a church, they might be able to help you out?

If you need to talk to someone I do know that Focus on the Family has free licensed counselors that you can call and talk to. I know they would be happy to come along side you and your daughter in anyway they can.

I will keep you in my prayers!

heretolisten
by Bronze Member on Nov. 27, 2013 at 4:31 PM

I'm so sorry.  (((HUGS)))

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