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Which last name?

Posted by on Dec. 19, 2013 at 6:54 PM
  • 35 Replies

I am now 23 weeks pregnant and am constantly asked whose last name will the baby take on...

My ex and I are not together, nor will we ever be... he comes and goes as he pleases or when  is conveinent for him... so do i give the child his last name or mine?

I am not sure how this works with court systems and what not? If i gave him his last name would it cause more grief in the long run?

by on Dec. 19, 2013 at 6:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
bluedeaj
by Deidre on Dec. 19, 2013 at 7:29 PM

I just would suggest giving the kiddo your own last night.  My daughter has my last name.  She was born while I was married, so she has her father's last name too.  I've decided not to change my last name back to my maiden name, not only b/c of the hassle it'd be for me to go through that, but because I want to go ahead and keep the same last name as my kiddo.  At least for now.

amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 8:41 PM

Totally up to you and what you feel is best for your child.  I gave my oldest son his dad's last name, though we were no longer together.  My younger kids have their dad's last name (we were married at the time they were born) and when we divorced I went back to my maiden name.

SueSahara
by Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 9:49 PM

If you give the child his last name that means his name is on the birth certificate. Trust me if you aren't together and he is already a ns dont do it when his name is on the abirth certificate you have to get his signiture for everything 

SueSahara
by Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 9:53 PM

I would get so pissed (before the custody agreement) when I would have to call my dd deadbeat to get his signiture so I could get important documents for MY DD. He wasn't even helping me with her or seeing her and he would give me a hard time just to be an ass.

sid1083
by Silver Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 10:06 PM
You (general) can give a child any last name you want - the father's name won't automatically be put on the bc…paternity must be proven if an affidavit isn't filled out.

I gave both my kids their dad's last name. Go with your gut on it OP…it really comes down to personal preference.


Quoting SueSahara:

If you give the child his last name that means his name is on the birth certificate. Trust me if you aren't together and he is already a ns dont do it when his name is on the abirth certificate you have to get his signiture for everything 

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sara_g21
by on Dec. 20, 2013 at 12:00 AM
This is true, a last name is just a name. You can give your child any name you want. It is not a declaration of paternity or any legal reflection. I have both kids with their fathers name because that's my family culture and tradition. My kids have two different fathers, my oldest 's past away, and I am on and off with my new baby's father. Her dad opted not to sign declaration of paternity. He was angry with me at the time and now regrets it... Telling you this so you can see that theses issues can be a roller coaster. Choose what feels right to you. It won't change relation ship status, child support, rights...

Quoting sid1083: You (general) can give a child any last name you want - the father's name won't automatically be put on the bc…paternity must be proven if an affidavit isn't filled out.



I gave both my kids their dad's last name. Go with your gut on it OP…it really comes down to personal preference.




Quoting SueSahara:

If you give the child his last name that means his name is on the birth certificate. Trust me if you aren't together and he is already a ns dont do it when his name is on the abirth certificate you have to get his signiture for everything 

MomToNeeners
by Bronze Member on Dec. 20, 2013 at 12:26 AM

I would give your child your last name.

mollymae09
by on Dec. 20, 2013 at 12:32 AM
Give him yours!!! I regret EVERY SINGLE DAY that I gave him his fathers last name.
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Solo_Fan
by Member on Dec. 20, 2013 at 1:16 AM

 I would say your last name.

katy516
by on Dec. 20, 2013 at 2:26 AM
I'm giving my daughter my last name. She is mine. And her father won't be around.
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