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how do i do this?

Posted by on Mar. 13, 2014 at 12:57 PM
  • 8 Replies

My DD is in pre-k and this month we have to do a family tree with her talking about her family.


Well here the probelm or at least what could be a problem is the fact that while her bio dad is not a part of her life( he has not since her since we divoce when she was 16 month old his choice) so im not adding him or her half sibling to the tree.( that something im waiting till she a bit older to explain that yes she does have two sister and why we never see them). 


Here the thing im worried about we currently live with my parent..( have been since i divorce). She see my father as her dad. She know his name and that he is her grandpa and well she also says he is her dad and i have never told her that she is wrong. In turth my dad is her dad he does everything just like a real dad does.

what im concern is when she talks about her family what would the other children say to her and how this could see her life as not being the same? Should i bring this up to her teacher so that she does not correct DD when she called her grandpa her dad as well.

by on Mar. 13, 2014 at 12:57 PM
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Replies (1-8):
dominatrix250
by on Mar. 13, 2014 at 1:01 PM
Every family dynamic is different. Have her draw out the only family tree she knows. Many single Mom's have no Father figure in their kids lives. You are doing a good thing by being with your parents. Who cares what the other kids think. You can explain that there are many types of families in a way she understands.
Good luck. *hugs*
virginiamama71
by Carrie on Mar. 13, 2014 at 1:45 PM

 This is a time for her to learn that families are not only made up of a Mother and Father.

krisnkids
by Gold Member on Mar. 13, 2014 at 2:48 PM
1 mom liked this

I would just put him in the family tree the way he should be. Many children in today's world are being raised by one or two grandparents. The teacher will understand.

happynewyorker
by Member on Mar. 13, 2014 at 3:00 PM
1 mom liked this

For me I don't see the problem.  My daughter (10  yrs old), sees here dad (we are divorced and we both moved out last August 2013).  But, she has a loving relationship with my step father.  She tells him everything to Eric then her own dad.  She even told me once that she wished Poppy (Eric) was her real dad because he does everything with her. 

Why not practice with her to see what she's going to say about the family tree presentation??

My boss was 60 when he had his son.  People would tell him what a cute grandson he had. He would correct them and say thanks but it's his son.

I wouldn't worry, if I was you.

 

 

Shy_Dia
by Silver Member on Mar. 13, 2014 at 5:52 PM
1 mom liked this
This. There's actually a couple books about it too- geared towards kids.

I'd also start correcting her on calling him dad. That's just me though.... I just see so many problems from that alone... your grandpa is your dad? Did your mom sleep with your dad?- questions that can either come from adults or kids when they get older.



Quoting virginiamama71:

 This is a time for her to learn that families are not only made up of a Mother and Father.

momofone83
by on Mar. 14, 2014 at 12:39 AM

Actally she calls my dad papi its spanish for dad but i also know it a would used for grandpa in the states. But yea that would be strange if they thought it was both my and my daughter dad

Quoting Shy_Dia: This. There's actually a couple books about it too- geared towards kids. I'd also start correcting her on calling him dad. That's just me though.... I just see so many problems from that alone... your grandpa is your dad? Did your mom sleep with your dad?- questions that can either come from adults or kids when they get older.
Quoting virginiamama71:

 This is a time for her to learn that families are not only made up of a Mother and Father.


Callaly
by Jessica on Mar. 14, 2014 at 9:59 AM

 Personally, I would include her real father into the tree. I would have her say something about him not being around in her presentation.

Changing everything around for her to wait till she is older may make it seem more complicated then it really is to her. There are soooo many different family situations now a days that its nothing new.

I remember my estranged father having 3 other kids with different mothers, and in my eyes it was so complicated because the way everyone around me made it seem, in reality its not complicated, I have 3 half sisters and an estraged father, probably the same as about 100 other people in my city.

As parents, its how we make our kids feel about different situations, she could turn it around and be proud that she only has a mom and grandparents that are in her day to day life, because im sure there is another kid that doesn't have any of that. Just make the best out of this situation for the goodness of your child!

Miss_Magnolia.
by Member on Mar. 14, 2014 at 10:07 AM
Idk about having him there. Maybe leave it blank.

It's totally weird she calls your dad dad. I'd correct that asap
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