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panicking like crazy

Posted by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:59 PM
  • 9 Replies
My ex's mum just rang me and was asking after my kids and then asked if I was coping and things. I thought she was just being nice and concerned etc.
She then just casually said "you are awfully young to have 3 young children to look after on your own, why not let them come live with me?" Obviously I said no and asked her who the hell she thought she was and she then said "what about just the twins then? To lighten the load on you" again I said no and was ready to hang up on her when she said "well I tried to make it easy for you but you have given me no choice, I'm going to get custody of my grandchildren I will see you in court" and then hung up.

What the hell?!?!?! Can she even do that? Can someone tell me about what the procedure would be (I'm in the UK) sat here in tears terrified that my babies are going to be taken away.
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:59 PM
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Replies (1-9):
tamikadorch26
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:06 PM
2 moms liked this

She has no legal rights to your children. I don't care if you are low income and getting help from the state. The court is not just going to take away your children unless you are using drugs or abusing your kids. If you have a place where youstay that is ok to live in, food for your family, and it's it's not full of junk and pet crap (pee and dodo) then you are good to go. I know some people who barely get by and the state didn't take their kids. I never heard of the kids taking kids because the mother didn't have a lot or was rich. Women who hadtheir  kids at the age of 12  got to keep their kids so why wouldn't you. Your ex's parents are looking for some money. When you have kids you can carry them on your taxs and being that they are your kids the state will give them child care money and might even try to put you on child support. She just can't take your kids no matter how old you are. I would stay away from her. She is not trying to help you but herself. I would have told her I  will see you in court and after that to stay out of my family life. Many courts will always side with the mother unless she is unfit and can be proving to be. Is her son on child support to help you? If not then his ass would be and I would tell the court that if he did his part to help out with the kids then you would have to means to do better and to give the kids more. She have no rights at all when it comes to your kids. Best of luck to you.

youngmomma863
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:13 PM
I'm not on drugs or abusing my kids not that she would know that as she has never spent any considerable time with my kids. There is always enough food for my kids at my aunts (thats where we live) and it is safe for them to be here.
Since splitting up he hasn't given me any money for the kids but it hasn't been a week yet but I honestly don't think he will.

Thank you x

Quoting tamikadorch26:

She has no legal rights to your children. I don't care if you are low income and getting help from the state. The court is not just going to take away your children unless you are using drugs or abusing your kids. If you have a place where youstay that is ok to live in, food for your family, and it's it's not full of junk and pet crap (pee and dodo) then you are good to go. I know some people who barely get by and the state didn't take their kids. I never heard of the kids taking kids because the mother didn't have a lot or was rich. Women who hadtheir  kids at the age of 12  got to keep their kids so why wouldn't you. Your ex's parents are looking for some money. When you have kids you can carry them on your taxs and being that they are your kids the state will give them child care money and might even try to put you on child support. She just can't take your kids no matter how old you are. I would stay away from her. She is not trying to help you but herself. I would have told her I  will see you in court and after that to stay out of my family life. Many courts will always side with the mother unless she is unfit and can be proving to be. Is her son on child support to help you? If not then his ass would be and I would tell the court that if he did his part to help out with the kids then you would have to means to do better and to give the kids more. She have no rights at all when it comes to your kids. Best of luck to you.

tamikadorch26
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:58 PM

Well then you are fine. I wouldn't worry about it.  I would still put him on child support. You didn't make them kids on your own. Your Aunt can back you up as being a good mother to your kids. Court rarely take kids from mother's unless they are on drugs or abuse is going on. Grandparents don't have rigths to grandkids just because they want them. I wouldn't talk to any of them anymore. It's just stress for no reason. I would get a order of protection on them from calling and coming near you or your family.

krisnkids
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 7:12 PM

I would go to an attorney and see what the chances are. Do not hit the panic button until you need to. It sounds like gma is just blowing smoke. Go file for child support (or whatever its called in the UK) and get his ass paying cs.

youngmomma863
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 8:05 PM
Thank you ladies, how do I make him pay child support? I know I sound dumb but I have never had to know and don't know anyone who has been through it
dstarr347
by Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 8:41 PM
2 moms liked this

In the UK child support is called child maintenance here is a link that could help you:

https://www.gov.uk/child-support-agency  hugsMake sure you file for sole custody and child support before your husband files for custody of the kids. MIL calling like that sounds fishy so shore up your defenses. Good luck!

virginiamama71
by Carrie on Apr. 3, 2014 at 10:06 PM

 Hopefully you can get along with her so you and your children can have some kind of help. He is not helping you.

Is your family going to be there to help you?

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:05 PM
Unless you are a horrible parent in and out of jail etc she has no rights. File for sole custody get everything established now
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youngmomma863
by on Apr. 4, 2014 at 4:06 AM
Yes we are living with my aunt and she is helping

Quoting virginiamama71:

 Hopefully you can get along with her so you and your children can have some kind of help. He is not helping you.


Is your family going to be there to help you?

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