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I need mom advice on akward talks with my daughter

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 8 Replies
My daughter will be in jr high next month and is going through puberty, so we've been having akward talks about friends and boys. Is there any easy way to explain certain things that I feel she shouldn't know? Or jus tell her an let it go over her head or shock her? Finding out about boy parts an crushes was uncomfortable but fine an I'm glad she came to me. Periods, she's mature about but now I had to explain self harming/suicide to her. Our friend was mad and said our daughters can't hang out anymore cus mine is a bad influence and I said I don't think he fully understands what an "emo" kid is an y his daughter calls herself that. So she was in her eyes trying to share something in common w her and sent 3 pics of girls cutting their wrists. I asked her y she would do that an she said idk, Audree an Christine where shareing pics like that. I had an hr long talk about it w her. My daughter would never tell a girl it's ok to harm herself.
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 11, 2014 at 9:34 PM
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Replies (1-8):
toughmommy
by Member on Jul. 12, 2014 at 2:17 AM
1 mom liked this
That's a tough one. This kind of behavior is not at all innocent. I don't think you should shield her. I think you should give it to her straight. She needs to be shocked. Then you could have her shift her focus, have her do other things to lighten her sence of self and give her reasons to share happy motivational pics instead. Maybe she could do some sort of activity or volunteering. I think you should also sit down and give her a chance to talk to you. She wouldn't share those pics unless she had a false sense of what it means, if it continues I would have her talk to a counselor, sometimes the best thing a parent can do is rope in a third party. You'll figure it out. Good luck. Hope things go better for her.
Karen24
by Bronze Member on Jul. 12, 2014 at 8:48 AM
1 mom liked this
Hm. That stuff is tough to talk about. My DD (12-almost 13) had a friend last year that could be described as 'Emo' (they don't hang out anymore) I know she learned some unpleasant things from her and yes, we've had some very honest talks about this kind of stuff. I just try to be honest and not sugar-coat anything.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 12, 2014 at 12:48 PM
I don't give a ton of detail an she's told me before she jus needs the basics right now. I had a hard life as a kid an don't want her going through the same so I let her know the difference between good n bad
deltathree
by Gold Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 11:47 AM

She's at the age you can't shield her --- she'll get her info from school/other kids and that's not good.  Sadly, it's the way it is now. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 13, 2014 at 1:37 PM
That's true but when she comes to me I want to be able to talk to her about it
allwritenow
by Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 4:51 PM

When my daughter was in sixth grade, one of her classmates killed herself. Talk about shocking. There is no shielding your children from what is out there. They know things at younger and younger ages. Keep the discussion open, and make sure your daughter knows that no matter how awkward, you are willing to discuss with her.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 13, 2014 at 7:28 PM
I'm sorry your daughter went through that. I'm happy my daughter and I can talk about things, I just don't always have the awnser
LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jul. 13, 2014 at 11:47 PM
1 mom liked this
Bring up the topic and share some but let her ask questions. If you don't know be honest and look up the answer with her. My parents had no talks with me I found out a lot on my own and probably did things that could have been prevented by knowledge
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