Hi Ladies, I am new to this group. I am beside myself and not sure what to do?!?!?!?!
I am a single mom, my DD is 13. Her dad moved to a different state when she was 9 months old so has not been a huge part of her life. Not because of anything I have done. For years we had an amazing relationship, but has not been so good lately.
To fill you all in, he is disabled and has not worked since before she was born. I do receive benefits from his social security for her. But he, personally does not contribute. A couple of weeks ago, very early in the morning he called me and left a message, I called him back after seeing that he called without listening to the message. He went on about how neither of us better ever ask him for anything, and we are not welcome to visit (which I have not done in years and my DD does every summer) and that I should have aborted DD when he told me to..... Now who says something like that?!?!?! HORRIBLE!!! Then I listened to his message which was basically the same thing.
I have not asked him for any help financially in years, in fact i work 2 jobs so that i can be self supporting along with the social security benefits DD receives, which I use as child support. After about a week and a half i called him and he acted as if nothing happened and when I bought it up he said he was sorry. Then he started in about all the money he sends. He personally does not send a dime. It is social security, it does not affect him either way. She gets it as she is his child, if he did not have a child he would not get the money, it would just be a part of the system. I have been so grateful for this money as I could not have made it without it. I have told him this. I do not know what he wants from me. But after the horrible things he said I just do not know what to do. DD could really care less if she see's him, he just has not been a very good dad to her, however, her grandparents live down there and her cousins come to town every year at the same time so she looks forward to seeing them. He has a history of drug abuse, however, when I asked him what he was on when he said those things he said nothing.
I am not quit sure what to do... and no, my DD does not know about either of these conversations..... and how would you feel about money coming from social security, am I wrong???