Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

experienced help in visitations please

Posted by on Aug. 14, 2014 at 10:36 AM
  • 9 Replies
So I got an email from my babys father yesterday asking if I hurd from court. I called court to see if there was a hearing pending for visitations an there was. My worst nightmare. So its in oct. My child is 2. Never met this man ever! He pays child support weekly threw the courts. But we both live in different states. Me an my dd live in nj. Him an his preg gf in nc. (I think. Cause he said something about moving) I guess anyways would anyone know how the hearing might go if hes in nc an im in nj. An can I request him coming to nj for visitations since my dd dont even know who this man is. An she is with me 24/7 an freaks out when ever I leave her with her grandma (my mom). I hate this my dd is so close to me an my oldest dd that making her leave the state from the start with out taking it slowly might scare her which I dont want... any advice or help will be appreciated thankyou.
by on Aug. 14, 2014 at 10:36 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-9):
krisnkids
by Gold Member on Aug. 14, 2014 at 11:15 AM
2 moms liked this

You can ask for a gradual visitation plan. If I were you I would do a search for long distance gradual visitation plans and see what others do and go in with an idea of what you are willing to do. That way you don't get as many shocks.

kmc319
by Member on Aug. 14, 2014 at 11:18 AM
Thankyou. Thats a great idea.
Oliviasmom72
by Silver Member on Aug. 14, 2014 at 11:45 AM

Dad is still entitled to visits and its not necessarily his fault that he has not seen the child. Have you allowed and or encouraged any visits? Who moved? You can certainly ask that visits take place in your home or by a neutral 3rd party. Did you expect that would pay for a kid that he would never ever want to visit?

If you come across as reasonable and willing to work with him I think this will end better for you.

It is unlikely a judge will order unsupervised visits off the bat but this is not totally unheard of. Make it so that he will be willing to do supervised at first.

Good luck

kmc319
by Member on Aug. 14, 2014 at 12:39 PM
Father moved to nc right after she was born. Never even came to the hospital to see her. And from the get go wwnted nothing to do with her. Hinced why he moved
kmc319
by Member on Aug. 14, 2014 at 2:52 PM
Bump
Oliviasmom72
by Silver Member on Aug. 14, 2014 at 4:46 PM

Child support often triggers some involvement.

So since he moved, ask that he come to you for visits. I, but I would offer 4 hour increments in your home, every 2 weeks. I would do this for 6 months and see if he shows up most or all the visits. Be prepared for him to want his GF present. I would say no to this at this time but she will likely never be banned from being aroubnd your child but you should be able to control what happens in your home.

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Aug. 14, 2014 at 11:53 PM
Definitely ask for gradual skype, supervised etc
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
cjsmom1
by Gold Member on Aug. 15, 2014 at 2:20 AM

As the other ladies have suggested look into a gradual visitation plan. Research your options online and see which one you like the best. When you go to court bring it with you and explain why you think it's the best option for your dd.

kmc319
by Member on Aug. 15, 2014 at 11:17 AM
Thankyou ladies very helpful
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)